When I was 13 I was raped sevral times by an older teen in my hood. I never told anyone untill I was 17. I'm in my late 20's and started dating this new guy, I really like him, but I'am unsure if I should share this information with him, since I have moved on; and I don't want him to pity me or be afried to have sex with me.
2006-10-29 14:07:52 · 8 answers · asked by Fishgc 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I don't think it's something you share with a boyfriend, but if you were about to get engaged, then I think you do. And not because the guy is going to change his mind or anything, but it's a big part of your life, and you should be able to trust them with that. You may be over it, but an event that large still has its effects, and some of your behaviors would be better understood by your significant other in light of that.
It's not so much about "full disclosure" as it is being open and vulnerable with the love of your life. Until you get to that point, though, no need to talk about it.
2006-10-29 14:27:54 · answer #1 · answered by You'll Never Outfox the Fox 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If (and it sounds like you have) gotten over/past it keep it to yourself.
I can't see a good reason to reveal this unless it bothers you and you are concerned about your image,or his thoughts.
But, for some reason your revealing is some sort of a symbol of love that you want to share, sort of like it was your virginity, you may consider it. Or as a test of his potential loyalty/maturity to you.
Otherwise I can't see why you would waste energy on even thinking bout what to do.
Good luck.
2006-10-29 14:23:50 · answer #2 · answered by GERALD S. MCSEE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are some secrets that are better kept secret. You have moved on. This secret will devastate him because of his love for you. It's better not to tell him. You're starting a wonderful life now with a new guy who loves you. It's time for yourself to forget your past and start a new, wonderful beginning. Don't stay in the past, live your life to the fullest. We're rooting for you!
2006-10-29 14:16:35 · answer #3 · answered by Jb 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I told my fiance which is the father of my 2 kids....but didnt tell a bunch of guy friend I had between the raped and this relation ship
2006-10-29 14:11:23 · answer #4 · answered by tinkerbelle_oceane 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think let it go. at this point in your life...it was an experience from long ago...while a horrible experience, you have overcome it and if you have moved beyond it then let it go. This is a new guy you've begun dating...give it a clean slate. Your a strong person, and you are in a new chapter in your life. good luck!
2006-10-29 14:16:14 · answer #5 · answered by star 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it might explane some things about you to him then again you might not want to if hes jsut a fly by night boyfriend. depends on you.
2006-10-29 14:11:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
dont say anything it's in the past unless he asks or brings up sumthing related to it
2006-10-29 14:11:10 · answer #7 · answered by freemechulie 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you dont have to tell him unless, you contracted a disease or something, but just wait and tell him when your ready and when your comfortable.
2006-10-29 14:32:22 · answer #8 · answered by ya girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋