We knew each other from before but started dating for 5 months now. His kind and a great friend, but as BF material, he confuses the F#@K of me! One week his into me calling me and wanting to see me and the next his abit distant and kind of cold and this goes on and on in a circle. I'm not the nagging type and I hate saying why dont you do this and that!
He says to give him time and he'll warm up to things. I feel like Im the man in the relationship really, I pay and enitiate all our outings and stuff and he hardly includes me in his things. I dont know if his like this coz his confortable with me as we use to be mates before we went romatic. I tried talking to him but Im not sure if his confused or just likes to be alone alot of the time and when he wants to be with me then he puts in the effort. I just dont know whether his coming or going. What would you do? I do like him and I know he does too more then friends? but why does he do this then? Help pls!shld I leave?
2006-10-29 12:38:49 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My advice is leave. You will end up being hurt and having to leave in the long run, so why make it worse?
If he was a business venture you'd close it down or sell it.
If bf was a job where the pay was irregular, customers moody, you had to make management decisions, you had to spend your own money to do the job, and you were up all hours doing the bosses paperwork then you'd quit.
You said you have to initiate and pay for outings, this shows his lack of commitment to you. He may even have another girlfriend. He wants more time, but he's had more than enough time to get his act together. He's hot then cold, this shows immaturity and insincerity. He' just using you.
Think of it this way: He doesn't actually want a relationship with you, so, as a good friend, what should you do? You should help him. Give him the present he wants: dump him.
2006-10-29 13:20:43 · answer #1 · answered by Bad bus driving wolf 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have actually known someone in this kinda situation before. Step back and look at the big picture. Has he ever been in a relationship before, if he did how long was it? If hes being distant maybe its male pms or maybe hes scared or confused about you. I would just step back do your own thing for a week and see if he calls...if you feel better knowing that you are telling him something, tell him that you want him to initate things insted of you doing it. If that doesnt work just tell him that things were much easier between you two when you were friends. But remember: a relationship takes 2 people, and it takes work. If you think that this is something that you guys can work out, then try to work on it. If not, stay friends and look for someone who can be the man in the relationship. hehe. Good luck!
2006-10-29 20:48:11 · answer #2 · answered by Katie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have also been in this situation. My gf didn't care about me.
He doesn't respect you or the old friendship is getting in the way. He should have had enough time to warm up to the idea, but he just can't accept it. Maybe he likes someone else and is just ignoring u so u break up with him. I would either talk to him to find out what is goin on, deal with it, or dump him.
2006-10-29 20:55:51 · answer #3 · answered by Snowboarder91 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ALWAYS require respect from your guys. He's using you to pay for his dates. He's not confused about you he's just not all that wound up about you. It wouldn't surprise me to find he's got other fish to fry if you get the meaning. He does that to you because it's convenient and he doesn't want to do otherwise. Don't ever accept less than you need or "second hand" treatment from your guys.
2006-10-29 20:57:33 · answer #4 · answered by DelK 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well honey im sorry but you wanted a mans view, so here it is he's still looking, if he really cared and was into you, you would know, but deep down i think you already do.
2006-10-29 20:45:26 · answer #5 · answered by belfiglioval 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it seems he is only into being with you on a semi regular basis. If you want more then I think you will be unhappy in a realtionship with him. Be prepared to ditch him..
2006-10-29 20:42:53 · answer #6 · answered by mayigniteunderpressure 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's full of S#@*.
2006-10-29 20:40:42 · answer #7 · answered by revieskid 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋