A good long-distance friend of mine is seriously depressed. He has seen a doctor before but claims that medications only make his depression worse. He has taken to drinking to help his depression but I don't think he understands that he is only making it worse. He is in a bad relationship but is afraid of losing his kids if he leaves her. He is truly unhappy and I want to help him because he has always been there for me. What is some advice I can give him and what are some things I can tell him to make him feel better?
2006-10-29 10:59:16 · 9 answers · asked by A Girl 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
If his meds made him more depressed he's either not being treated properly or he's not telling the truth. It's not unusual for alcoholics to lie to be able to continue drinking. I'd be very suspicious of that. He needs to get to a physician skilled in treating depression and follow the regime.
2006-10-29 11:05:51 · answer #1 · answered by DelK 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You could send him some information on the VERY strong link between alcohol use and depression. If he understands it, maybe he will be more open to getting help. It IS true that many people are not helped by antidepressants, so I would suggest counseling.
I'd stress that he's not "crazy", but is responding normally to an awful shock and that it's not permanent (if it's a recent thing, though it sounds like he's had bouts of this already). However, if he becomes an alcoholic, it WILL be permanent! Kicking depression once you're addicted is incredibly difficult, and often impossible! If he gets bad enough, maybe you can get together w/his family and do an intervention. You might try reasoning with his partner, and letting her know how bad it is (does she?).
He also needs to get out of that relationship and find a good lawyer. The legal system is much better now about not automatically giving custody to the mother. If he's a full-blown alcoholic, though, he will be much less likely to get any kind of custody! And eventually, she'll probably leave HIM!
Below are some links you could send him. The first one is interesting, as it deals with a "functioning" alcoholic (the kind that drinks steadily yet never gets a DUI, loses a job or thrown in jail, etc. These are often the people who die of it, 'cause they never "hit rock bottom") (1)
The third link (3) deals more with depression and the different types. It sounds like your friend has "reactive depression" (reacting to a traumatic event), rather than a clinical depression/ However, a qualified psychiatrist needs to make that diagnosis.
The best thing you can do for your friend is let him know you still care about him and that you're there for him. Depressed and/or alcoholics/heavy drinkers usually feel VERY alone and are often shunned by society's ignorance regarding addiction. You are a true friend and he's lucky to have you.
2006-10-29 19:19:11 · answer #2 · answered by Gwynneth Of Olwen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alcohol is a depressant, it cannot help. I agree with first anwer either he is lying to keep drinking or he need to try new meds.
Pray for Him and let God handle it if you believe, He deals with people far better than us.
If you don't believe, still leave him alone. Alcoholics need to hit "rock bottom" and losing his kids may help him get there. It hurts to watch loved ones go through difficulties I know. Chin up!
2006-10-29 20:34:00 · answer #3 · answered by judge_smails_sir 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what a good friend you are ,,, you have reason to be concerned the friend who is Drinking is only making the depression worse, if he sees a Dr. who specializes in mental health he CAN find a med that work for him ,it might take a while to find the right medication . please tell him that and if hes worried about the bad relationship maybe its because of his drinking and depression I really don't know what to tell you to make him feel better just let him know that your there for him and also concerned about his drinking..... good luck
2006-10-29 19:11:40 · answer #4 · answered by MissMonk 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
In the Beginning God created heavens and earth.
God gives you air to breathe and sunshine to enjoy.
God gives you water to drink and food to eat.
God gives you a wonderful body and sound mind, to live.
God loves you, and you are precious to Him.
Son of God died on the Cross to save us from condemnation.
Jesus’ love is boundless and everlasting.
We have the hope of Heaven through Jesus.
Life therefore has fantastic and glorious future!
(Digestion of above can even prevent depression and suicide attempt.)
2006-10-29 19:26:54 · answer #5 · answered by Moriahho 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
CALL 1800LIFENET WHICH HELPS PEOPEL OUT. SEE METANOIA.ORG OR ASKTHEINTERNETTHERAPIST.COM. GO TO ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS. GO TO AYURVEDICCURE.COM WHICH HAS NATURAL STUFF FOR DEPRESSION. TELL HIM TO WALK 30 MINUTES A DAY. LISTEN TO POSITIVE MUSIC. TELL HIM TO LOOK AT HOLISTICONLINE.COM.
2006-10-30 06:42:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would tell him to drink up. Depression stinks.
2006-10-29 19:13:02 · answer #7 · answered by sweetirsh 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
He has to find his own way. Butting in may cause more damage. You may need to go to al anon.
2006-10-29 19:07:07 · answer #8 · answered by mellijenk 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
well,me personally,i would ask him to start reading the bible.
that always cheers me up,no matter what. :)
2006-10-29 19:07:34 · answer #9 · answered by forest lover 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋