My best friend is going through relationship issues. She had been dating this guy for 4 years. In that time he left her on five seperate occasions in pursuit of other women, lost his virginity to another woman while dating my best friend, sold and smoked marajuana, gone out and got drunk several times with his friends, and screamed and cursed her out every time she protested. He threatened my life because he assumed I was sleeping with her, though I have been engaged for some time. She finally got sick of it and broke up with him. He came crawling back to her and claimed how much he has changed, and he wants her to take him back. He claimed to quit all forms of drinking, yet he has gotten drunk several times since that claim. He claimed to quit smoking, even that has yet to be seen. The only argument she has made in his defense is that "at least he tells me the truth now instead of doing it behind my back." She is still considering getting back with him. Does this make sense at all?
2006-10-29 10:53:54 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No clearly this is not the right for your friend she needs to stay away from him because it sounds to me like this bf of hers may go to the length of beating on her someday. Besides he said he will stop drinking meaning he is still a drunk. If he was so bent on getting her back his first words should have been i have stop drinking and doing drugs. This man is not serious and you should do all you can to save your friend from this man.
2006-10-29 11:06:57 · answer #1 · answered by L@M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The worst mistake girls ever make is thinking a guy can or will change atleast not when it comes to who they are stuff like what your talking about you already answered the question he is still doing it I wish i could get through to your friend cause it will only get worse and accepting someone just because they want you is a mistake I have made and payed dearly for and I mean paid seriously with everything I had and ultimately will affect everything I ever do GOOD LUCK
2006-10-29 10:58:56 · answer #2 · answered by KIMBUR 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No sense at all. I know the trouble your having w/the whole thing. I have to be honest here and tell you that I would back way off the friendship because the drama would drive me batty. She doesn't think enough of herself to do better then I would let her be. I know it sounds mean to say that but life is just too short to put up w/the crap.
He will never change probably, she will stay for awhile if not forever so why allow it to darken your waters too?
2006-10-29 11:00:53 · answer #3 · answered by sideways 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best advise I can give you, is just be there for her when it falls apart, when she finally gets enough she will need a good friend to turn to. I know you just want to fix this for her and run him off, but its something she has to do for herself. She will eventually get enough and need a good friend like you. Try to show her how people are suppose to be treated, point out good things about other relationships, without being negative or putting pressure on her.
2006-10-29 11:03:13 · answer #4 · answered by magnolia_76 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend has to learn for herself. I know you want to intervene to protect your friend, but until she realizes that he is a loser for herself, there really isn't anything that you can do for her. She has some personal issues that draws her to the type of people that this particular guy is and these are issues that she has to face and overcome which is pretty hard for most women to be able to do. The best thing you can do is just be ready and be there for your friend when reality comes crashing down on her, because eventually it will. But to answer your question...no, this guy hasn't changed one bit, and don't expect him to because he won't. What he has done is found new words that he is using to manipulate your friend because she falls for it.
2006-10-29 10:59:45 · answer #5 · answered by boxerpitk9 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, it doesn't. A lot of women are in that situiation though. When you love that person so much, you desperately want to believe them. The truth is, most of the time they will "change" for a while then go back to the same crap they did before. you need to try and help her get over this man. He will destroy her life.
2006-10-29 10:57:13 · answer #6 · answered by day dreamin baby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No this makes no sense, you friend has some relationship issues.
She needs to leave this man, she could get hurt very badly if she stays with this man.
It sounds like she is the type of woman that...not to sound harsh but won't do what is best for her cause she says she loves the man.
You as her friend need to help her before she gets hurt.
2006-10-29 10:56:58 · answer #7 · answered by Engel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some women it's hard to give up on 4yrs even when the writing is on the wall she's not alone I've seen it before like women who date bad boy's and when they pull crap on them they can't believe it. To bad you can't just kick his butt and tell him to move on. All you can really do though is be her friend and catch her when she falls and sooner or later it's going to happen.
Then she will wonder how she wasted so much of her time on a loser...
2006-10-29 11:01:49 · answer #8 · answered by miester44 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it doesn't make sense, but love never does. When she gets tired of it she will leave him. Until then just continue to support her.
2006-10-29 10:58:44 · answer #9 · answered by MsT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is obviously psychotic and it would be an extremely bad idea for her to get back together with this cretin.
2006-10-29 10:56:42 · answer #10 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋