have a really intense dream about my ex. The dream leaves me feeling really confused as all the old feelings come back, and in the dream the message seems to be that he's the one I should be with. However in real life this guy was not nice to me, and although we had a real connection I spent most of the time with him unhappy. What do you make of this?
2006-10-29 09:55:39 · 10 answers · asked by rachel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
NO stupid 3rd answerer. I have been with my fiance 5 years but have been engaged for 1 year! should i have said that i have been with my former boyfriend (4 years), now fiance(1 year) to make that clear enough for you to understand? and in any case, my mother was engaged for 12 years and has been happily married for 8, so what you said makes no sense whatsoever. dumbass.
2006-10-29 10:04:24 · update #1
Its just a dream, keep reminding yourself, that he isn't a nice person, and the person you are with now, is a much better person that your ex.
I still dream about my ex too, about us getting back together and stuff, and in my dreams, I'm really happy. Then I wake up and remind myself he's an Ar*se and I don't even want to be with him.
All the Best.
2006-10-29 10:01:05 · answer #1 · answered by bizzybee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some reason your subconscious mind is still trying to work something out with your ex - and that is why you are having these dreams. It could be like a puzzle that you are trying to work and there is a piece missing and it is driving that part of your mind into a frenzy from time to time... I think we all dream about our ex'es especially if they were long term relationships. It's natural. It doesn't mean you should be together again. Like you said - things were not good with him and you were unhappy. IF you were together today - it would be the same or worse.
The best thing to do is just wake up and shake it off. You're happy with your fiance and there is no point in going backwards.
2006-10-29 10:01:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dream psychology is a tricky subject. It may have nothing to do with you're ex, and more to do with your fiancee. Are you worried that things are getting stale? if so try role play, new undies or some time away together to spice it up. Is it fear of commitment? if so, going back to your ex won't help. You split once for a reason, and in my experience, if you try again it will end the same way. Possibly try talking to your fiancee about the issue. When it comes to it, a sleep therapist, or psychologist worth their salt would be a better person to ask than yahoo answer.
2006-10-29 10:04:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The issue that broke up you an your ex has never been resolved.
Hence, you are in a preoccupation with it, which sometimes surfaces when you're sleeping. It could also mean that there are feelings buried underneath the current scene which is why it keep cropping up.
There are one or two things you can do.
1/ Try and resolve the original issue.
2/ Decide that regardless of no resolution; that you ARE happy with your fiance, and move on.
Good luck with your choices.
2006-10-29 10:05:09 · answer #4 · answered by littlebritfan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is not real connection between the dream and what you should do. The dream is from something you noticed during the day that reminded you of the ex. You may not even realize that you were reminded of your ex, but your brain picked up on something and used it in the dream. Dreams are a way for our brains to "defrag" the information we have poured into them all day. They mean nothing except that we have lived that day.
2006-10-29 10:00:00 · answer #5 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Things re-surface in my life in phases. I think about old friends or things that went wrong. I think about good times too.
If you know he was wrong for you then use that knowledge to cope with your dreams about your ex. It is only natural to think over sections of our life and the experiences that we have. If we didn't reflect and learn from our good and bad decisions we wouldn't get very far.
There is a chance that your current partner is lacking in a certain way that your ex excelled in. Perhaps try and improve things in that area - maybe romantic things / nights out / holidays / sex life and see if that changes anything.
Bottom line - you know you are with the right person. Dreams don;t change that.
2006-10-29 10:01:46 · answer #6 · answered by Stanleymonkey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have been engaged to be married for 5 years and you are still not married ??
What kind of an engagement is that ?
Perhaps your periodic dream is telling you that you should go back to someone who might really marry you...
You need to get this engagement issue resolved...
Find a man who will marry you...
Not necessarily your ex but certainly someone who will commit to taking care of you properly and permanantly...
2006-10-29 10:00:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It may just be general fears which can crop up now and then. It does sometime happen when you'd been with the same person for a long time Get through it by reminding yourself abt the person that youre with and why. Works for me.
2006-10-29 09:57:37 · answer #8 · answered by DarlaTremere 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dream is just a dream, its not reality. if it helps i would write your dream down on a piece of paper because if you see it in writing it may answer some of your own questions.
I had the same problem when i was with my ex partner and we was together for 14 years.
but it definitely helped me writing it down so i could have more understanding to what the dream meant to me
good luck
2006-10-29 10:03:44 · answer #9 · answered by blondegirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that's pretty common, esp if he was your first real love.
Remember how you were not happy when you were with him, most likely he didn't appreciate you (if it's anything like my ex). I think this is something that every woman deals with at some point in their life.
2006-10-29 10:00:43 · answer #10 · answered by e. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋