I'm planning on proposing to a girl and since I'm a pretty traditional guy and she's a pretty traditional girl, I want to ask her dad/parents for their blessing before we get married. The problem is, he lives 4 hours away and I'm not sure how I'm going to get away from her, sneak up there to talk with him, and get back without her knowing what I just did. The other problem is that without calling and talking with them ahead of time, I can't really be certain they'll be home when I can get away and don't want to drive up there to visit an empty house. I suppose I could call him ahead of time and say that I'm coming up to visit but since her sister just got married, I'm pretty sure he would know what to expect once I got there... All of this being said, is it ok to just call her dad and talk with him about this or is it still the best to do it in person?
2006-10-29 02:55:49 · 21 answers · asked by BJ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
My fiance was in the same predicament as you. My parents live 4 hours away as well. You may not like this idea, but he called my parents, and spoke with both of them. This wasn't the way he wanted to ask, but time restrictions and job travelling were the problem for him. My parents couldn't be happier for us. If there is a way you can sneak away (call him first-maybe you two can meet half way?) then do it. If you can't, I don't see any problem with a phone call.
Good luck and Congrats!!
2006-10-30 01:54:56 · answer #1 · answered by Sher 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy, THIS sounds familiar!!
My husband and I lived 4 hours apart too.......and I am a traditional girl and told him I would never agree to marrying him if he didn't ask for my parent's blessing. (I had told him that a long time before he ever proposed.)
So, he called my parents one day and hoped I wasn't there and they were home. When my mom answered, he told her what his plans were and she gave her blessing and handed the phone to my dad, who also gave his blessing. Granted, it wasn't done in person, but it was done in the only way he could given the circumstances. He said that's the only time he's ever had to take a shower after a phone call cuz he was sweating so bad! haha
Good luck!!
2006-10-29 08:03:08 · answer #2 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Omigod... you are so sweet!
It's better to do it in person. However, you can call them up before you come over to their (her parents') place just to be sure that they're going to be around. Bring flowers for the mom as an additional gesture. I am sure that her folks will be so very happy that you take all the effort just to ask their daughter's hand in marriage. Better yet, do it just around the time that she's coming there -this you have to conspire with her sister or something- and propose there to her... in front of the whole family. That would be ultra-romantic!
Good luck to you, dude. It's very hard to find a guy like you nowadays. Say hi to your future fiance. She's a very lucky girl! :)
2006-10-29 04:19:16 · answer #3 · answered by girliegirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Has it been a while since you've both visited her parents? If so, arrange it with them in advance, and casually say "Hon, we haven't seen your parents in a while. Wanna head up there for the weekend? I have this really cool *insert some kind of gift* that I'd love to give your dad/mom. Plus we could go to *favorite place*. Let's just get away for a while and relax."
Give the gift to dad/mom, and propose on bended knee and shock the **** out of her!
You're still one of the old schoolers who believe in chivalry.
2006-10-29 04:19:14 · answer #4 · answered by chefgrille 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In person is the best way to do this, but with the distance between the 2 of you I would think calling would be okay. It will show her dad that you respect him by atleast calling to ask. Good luck with everything.
2006-10-29 05:07:13 · answer #5 · answered by af_wx_wife 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its so nice to see that there are still some traditional and romantic people out there
its always good to do things in person but im sure if you explain the situation he will be cool with you doing it over the phone.
good luck for your future hope the father agrees to let you marry his daughter. lol
2006-10-29 03:20:29 · answer #6 · answered by rosierotweiller 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
First, I think its wonderful that you want to ask for his blessing.
Second, in person is best. If you absolutely can't get away then explain the whole situation over the phone.
Good LUck!
2006-10-29 16:29:25 · answer #7 · answered by Mommy-of-Twins 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call him and ask him if he wants to meet you for lunch one afternoon. Meet halfway, then you won't have to drive so far. You could even come up with a reason why you will be out that way (business meeting/shopping). I think it's sweet that you would do that for your girlfriend. Definitely in person, though.
2006-10-29 07:03:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Plan a visit and you both go up. Take him to the side and ask him. With his blessing, pop the question in her parents home! Good luck to ya!
2006-10-29 03:01:00 · answer #9 · answered by cowboy462006 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yes it ok to call her dad for an engagement. If you dont want your gf around just call her friends and tell them to take her shopping for stuff and then you call her dad and ask him and then your 99.9% get his permission and then you can propose to her than night with a romantic dinner and a rose and a diamond ring.
2006-10-29 07:16:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋