I certainly can top that. My sister who is 22 hasn't seen her daughter in two weeks, and they live in the same house. My sister decided to work from 12:30 pm to 9:30 pm and she chose to do that so when my mom is taking care of the children in the morning she knows she doesn't have to. So she wakes up around 11:30 am takes a shower and is out of the door and refuses to say bye to the kids. She doesn't see her children because they are in bed by 8:30 pm. She and her fiancee broke up and he never sees the children also. She just started to date again, after f*cking every guy she met and making her kids call them Daddy.Well, Just my mom and his mom are the caregivers, His parents are the worse, I went to their rotten house because I was meeting my mom to go to the mall with her and we had to pick up my nephew. The mom had tossed Donovan to me, got in a car and split. I was so confused. The only person My niece and nephew really love is my mother. My niece even calls me mommy which is wrong. I asked her does she like her mommy's new boyfriend, and she said no, because he takes up all of her time. My sister is planning to move in with this man, he has a dui just like her ex fiancee had a dwi, so she picks them perfect right? He is pretty much a kevin federline. My sister has never been there for the children and it hurts. When I just turned 16 I took care of my niece when she was just born, because my sister didn't want to. That's how I knew I was going to be a great mom.
2006-10-29 02:23:22 · 6 answers · asked by fourcheeks4 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Pretty much what I am saying is should I do something for the welfare of my niece and nephew or it's just not my place and watch the children be thrown into different people's families and grow up akward, They will get confused of who their daddy is?
2006-10-29 02:25:00 · update #1
My sister is very immature, I took a picture of my son and my nephew and she was in the background flipping the camera off
2006-10-29 02:25:58 · update #2
Is there a way to talk to her? She is very stubborn and never listens
2006-10-29 02:26:36 · update #3
It sounds like your mom is the one who needs to say something. She is allowing this behavior. If your sister doesn't want to be a mom then she should step out of the picture. But is that an option to your mom? You can't force someone to grow up. If giving birth didn't do it, I doubt you can change her mind or attitude. If you or your mom are willing to step up and take full time care and custody of the children then ya'll should do something. If not, then you're pretty much stuck. You sure don't want her to take them on her own right now, you think they are neglected now, if your mom and you are out of the picture, what then? Some may say, "Tough love on your sister, let her be the mom, don't help her" but thats not what is best for the children. Thay need security, it really doesn't matter where they get it in the long run. Support the kids, but your mom needs to protect them. She should be the one to "stir the pot" so to speak. She has allowed your sister to do this for a while. Seek real proffesional advice on how to handle her. People on here can only give opinions, we're not there and this is serious. Children's futures are at stake. Hope this helps.
2006-10-29 02:41:02 · answer #1 · answered by zekemarie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh sweetie. First of all take a deep breath. You need to calm down. Secondly, repeat after me, "I cannot change other people, I can only change my reactions to them"
Although it is hard, you have to let go. You did not bring these children into the world and they are not your responsibility. You cannot talk to your sister or force her to grow up or make her a good parent. She has to make the decision to do that, you can't make her.
I KNOW it hurts, I have watched my sis ruin her children for 15 years. Now her oldest son is in and out of trouble and sitting in juvenile detention as I type this. The worst part is there is absolutely nothing I can do. I used to fight with my sis to try to get her to see reality and all that accomplished was her hating me and keeping me away from her kids. So I learned to shut my mouth and just to spend as much time as possible being the great Aunt. In that way I can at least have a little influence over their lives and thought patterns.
It was very hard for me to learn to let go, and I still grieve for her children on occassion. BUT it is her life and her kids, not mine, so there is nothing else that can be done.
Pray for your niece/nephew, with a mom like that, they will need it.
2006-10-29 02:41:35 · answer #2 · answered by Gem 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talking to her will not help..she is selfish and immature and nothing you can say will change her behavior. it sounds like you have already learned form her how NOT to be a mom. So make sure her kids are safe and secure and love them so they know they can trust you...
2006-10-29 08:00:26 · answer #3 · answered by deidra3970 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why bother she has already decided what she wants to do with her life and it doesent sound like her kids are part of it so just try to be there for the little ones cause its not there fault good luck
2006-10-29 02:27:23 · answer #4 · answered by suepetonquot 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she should get that starts in the morning and ends at lunch then she could spent time with her daughter
2006-10-29 02:26:42 · answer #5 · answered by elmo_roxs_13 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your sister needs therapy. if she wasn't ready to look after her kids then why must she make her children suffer. she must take responsibility of her kids. their father must be involved
Children are a gift from GOD.
2006-10-29 02:29:42 · answer #6 · answered by moombaziebo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋