This is so embarrassing. I was on top of things before the wedding, I sent thank-yous for the shower gifts etc. However I didn't have a chance to send thank you's for the actual wedding gifts. It's horrible! (My wedding was in July 2004!). I used to be in public accounting, was auditing a global auto manufacturer etc. It was also when Sarbanes-Oxley started being a huge deal and pain in the a$$.... on top of that we were dealing with filing info etc. for my husband's immigration etc. (I'm a citizen of the US).....
Anyway! I know there are no real excuses for this... I tried to use beautiful Christmas cards made with my favorite picture from the wedding, with a thank-you inside (in Dec 2004) but I gave up since I knew that some guests had moved... etc. etc.! Obviously after the year end, we got even busier with work and it was just awful! However, I have a much better job now and my best friend said I should send Christmas cards (without the wedding pic). Ideas?
2006-10-29 01:30:07 · 7 answers · asked by Mishy 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Actually the cards that I had made in Dec 04 are printed with a beautiful pic of my husband and me on the front - I woudn't be sending a photo. Also, no - this is not because I'm about to "celebrate something else" etc. I really feel awful about this. It was terrible. I think the simpler I keep it, the better. In Dec 04, I was going to send those holiday cards (with the wedding pic printed on the front) and then I was going to write the thank you on a separate pretty piece of paper and put it inside. But when I realized that some people had moved etc. (and I was already so close to Christmas etc.) I just gave up.... maybe I should just say something right in the Christmas card?
2006-10-30 15:30:44 · update #1
I dont think you can make it up at this point. I think that if you were to send Christmas cards dont mention it at all. By this point it is really past the point of correcting. Perhaps on your 5 year anniversary you can send something out to all the guests and say that you appreciate them attending your wedding, that your relationship is growing and striving and stress that you are truly thankful for their attendance and gift 5 years back. Point out that their contribution set a wonderful foundation for the success of your marriage. Try your hardest to track down every single one of your guests to send this out to, hopefully it will rekindle some past relationships as well.
2006-10-29 03:30:30 · answer #1 · answered by !?!?! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think holiday cards with a wedding pic or two in there is a fabulous idea. Don't trip over yourself by explaining that you got busy at work and then you had this other idea but that didn't work out, etc. etc. Just be upfront. Because really, the only explanation is "I messed up." Thank them for the gift and their thoughtfulness and wish them a happy holiday season.
On a personal note, I've sent wedding gifts and have never gotten a thank you note. If I had finally gotten one two years later, I would not hold any hard feelings or anything. I'd appreciate the fact that they 'fessed up and did the right thing. Good luck!
2006-10-29 02:08:05 · answer #2 · answered by mrssamikeyp 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love what the person said about "it's never too late to do the right thing." You may even want to use that in your handwritten notes inside the cards, saying that it's your new favorite quote. I, too, have given gifts for wedding and births, sent flowers to funerals -- all kinds of things, really -- that were never acknowledged. They were given to very professional people from whom I expected a response. But, when none came, it didn't make me not like them, or think less of them -- just think differently of them. I suppose previously I thought of these people as someone who had it all together. Almost a relief to know that none of us really have it totally together and that others botch up sometimes, too. What your friends will remember about you, after this is all over with, is NOT that you are the type of person who doesn't send thank yous, but that you are the type of person who when they slight someone or don't do exactly the right thing, just can't let it go until it is rectified. That's a good thing. Send these out, the sooner the better. You are going to have such relief over not entering 2007 with this hanging over your head. (As a personal point, I don't think I'd send them along with holiday cards, if it were me. I'd let it be a whole separate thing, even though that's more postage.)
2006-10-30 03:53:46 · answer #3 · answered by Rvn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's never too late to do the right thing. Perhaps a holiday greeting card with an insert in your handwriting, explaining that you are sorry for being so late but you love the gift they gave to you ? You can even get fancy with pictures of you and your husband using the gift such as a blender , or whatever.If the gift was monetary, tell the recipient how much their gift helped you set up a kitchen or whatever.
2006-10-29 01:46:05 · answer #4 · answered by Cammie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd fix it. Say something in the Christmas card, or mail the thank you notes now. Don't make a big deal of it, thank the person, and apologize for being late. the photos are OK if you want to go to the expense and trouble, but since it has been two years...
I do not mean to be mean, or to accuse, but hopefully you are not fixing things because you are about to celebrate another happy event, and have realized you won't be getting any gifts for it. I just wanted to advize you before you might make another, potentially bigger, faux pas.
Good for you, wanting to make things right!
2006-10-29 05:56:37 · answer #5 · answered by riversconfluence 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop beating yourself up about this.
The card with the wedding pic is a good ideal.
Write inside: Thanks for Comeing to my Wedding, Sorry it's taken so long for me to get back to you...I hope we can meet again soo.
It's a faux pas, sure, but many people forget to do these things. It's not a crime, just a little careless.
2006-10-29 08:38:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Better late than never :) I love the idea of the cards - and why not follow with an open-house invitation? Let people come see your new place, with your new appliances/furniture/etc.
Best Regards,
Holly
2006-10-29 03:19:19 · answer #7 · answered by Holly 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋