Can you give me an advice please?

Question

I am having problems with my father.We seem to just not understand each other. Everyday we are argueing and just can't have a normal talk as father to daughter he gets very angry on me, I talk back to him and we get to have very ugly fights. Sometimes i feel that i want go away, just to not be home anymore.I am 19 years old, and this hole mess is mostly because i want to hang out more and sometimes i come home late and then my parents get very angry. please help me , thank you...

Answer 1

I have no children, but I know if I had a son he could stay out every night and sleep with as many girls as he wanted. If I had a daughter I would want her home always and be a virgin until someone I regarded as a decent chap came into her life.

Doesn't make sense I know, but that is being human!

Answer 2

Maybe half of your father's anger at you is nothing but worry and concern for your safety. You say this started because you started going out more. What if you and your parents sat down and made up some rules, such as you will be going out on x number of days a week, but you will be home by a certain time, or you will definitely always call if it's going to be later, or similar things that will give your parents the feeling that they are still watching over you and that you're willing to work with them, not against them.

Answer 3

You should resepect and obey your parents. If you dont do then get ready for the same treatment, situation and behavour from your kids in future. To be 19 years, makes no sense to argu with parents,.Why did you forget that your mom kept your gene inside her for 9 months, then gave your births with pains, then sacrificed all their comforts, rests etc to take care of you and bring you up. How they took care of you by feeding, cleaning, bathing you while you were minor. Now you became young and behaving like that? If they say dont stay out late, they are right. They talking about your benefits. In fact in this age group most of the people dont think on proper and right lines. Look you can find around you that many youths have spolied themselves by adopting wrong lines like drinking, gambling, sexing and other immoral habits.

Answer 4

Try sitting down after they have time to calm down from last fight then ask them what they feel you need to do to avoid these fights and tell them what you feel about it, remember to be very calm and not attack them with it, but try to come to some mutual agreement about what their want and expectations are for their house "rules" and what your expectations and want are for being an adult.If things seem to get heated again tell them to think about it so far and you will come back to it when they feel able to always make it feel as thought your leaving them the control of the situation and that your open their criticism and advice.Sadly you do live in their house and they may require you to follow all rule as is but might also reconcider if you approach them as an adult and treat them as such.

Answer 5

What you could do, is stop arguing and just listen. You should also obey the rules and curfew, but hang out when you can. Or move out, and hang out. By agreeing to come home at a certain time and coming home late, you're proving yourself to be, unreliable and not trust worthy. It's important that you do the exact opposite of that.

Answer 6

Easy! You need to list your expectations & him the same. Set your boundaries, and rules, write them down, when your done , exchange. DO NOT READ IT RIGHT THERE!!!! You'll just fight. Walk away , and read it in private. Come up with some ideas that you know are fair not " FEEL " is fair. give it 48 hrs. then have a third party ( not a family member who lives there ) just someone that will be bias. A school counsler is perfect , they are great at mediation, most of them would love to help.

Answer 7

renka- this is the age when u will be cheated and u being a girl they r bothered.
not only thier name, reputation will shatter ur life also may scatter.
boys look descent till they get a girl but how things turn no one knows.
its better u come early and enjoy with them, they also will feel happy.
yes i can understand that u will be bored when u have a lot of friends cirlce.but they r giving u the whole day.
can't u come early?
these parties and night outs r very very dangerous if u r really a nice and good girl.

Answer 8

try opening the lines of communication with your family. Sit down and see if you can have an adult conversation with goals. Write down what's bothering you and some solutions and see if that works. Another suggestion would be to move out on your own. You are 19 after all and would be able to get a small apartment somewhere.

Answer 9

well as a parent we just want to see our kids grow up and be happy, but that doesn't mean the same to u as it does to us.
they would not get mad if they didn't love u. they want to see u either get a job or go to college.
i know, i remember 19 out of school and not sure what u want to do, but still want to go out and have fun.
don't get angry with them they are trying to be good parents and someday u will understand. when u have ur own kids. just think someday ur kids might be on here telling people the same thing :)

Answer 10

I have a19 years old daughter too,so I do understand how your Dad feel, he love u just like I do with my D ,from loving turn to worry anytime she go out, that why he get angry.Try to stay home more of fen,ask friends come over if u get bored,but just watch TV, do homework, play game....I bet U just few days your Dad will change,and you will see a SWEET FAMILY.