The situation:
I am currently renting a house with my friend and her boyfriend. Just over a month ago, the boyfriend's friend starts staying here because he was kicked out of HIS girlfriend's place for reasons unknown. He was supposed to be here for a couple nights, which stemmed into a couple weeks, which turned into just over a MONTH now. He eats our food, gets home extremely late and makes noise when I have to be up at 6am every day, and most annoying of all, he actually had the nerve to have a bunch of friends over that I didn't even know when my other roommates left for a weekend. We have not recieved ANY money from him.
My roommates don't seem to think it's as huge of a problem as I do, and are telling me that they don't want to "kick him on the curb". He has had more than enough time to find a new place. I don't feel like it's my place to be kicking him out since it's my roomie's friend - but this is getting to be a HUGE hassle.
I want him OUT. What can I do?
2006-10-28 20:10:33 · 17 answers · asked by Angela 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
by the way, he does have a full time job, so it's not as though finances are a problem for him.
2006-10-28 20:10:58 · update #1
I have no option of moving out - I'm on the lease as well as my roommates. The guy staying here is not on the lease.
2006-10-29 04:56:19 · update #2
Scenario 1
Move out. I would. They probably want to stay together anyway. Because they seem to like him so much .Maybe its better for you in the end. Find another place ASAP
Scenario 2
Give your portion of the rent money to your friend, his friend. Then it becomes your friends problem. Not yours. Put a lock on your door, stay there all the time. Wait until you get your new place.
2006-10-28 20:13:44 · answer #1 · answered by QuiteNewHere 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know it's a bit late for this, but one should never, ever let someone stay with them "for a few days". Especially if they've been kicked out for reasons you're not clear on. Chances are, they were kicked out for reasons that you'll find out personally in due course. If you do let someone couch dwell, PLAN on it being at least a couple of weeks, and come to terms of agreement concerning a bit of rent, and they buy their own food.
If all of your names are on the lease, find out what the rules are in your area on this situation. A lot of apartment complexes will get very irritated if they find out someone has been staying there who isn't supposed to. If that's the case, then talk it over with your roommates and come at it from the perspective of you'd like to stay on good terms with your landlord.
Do you have equal say in how your house is run ordinarily? If you don't, you may want to look into a new place, yourself. In cases of odd numbered roommates, someone tends to get left out in the cold, and I'm betting it's you. If you don't ordinarily stand up for what you want, then it might not be a bad idea to remind them of that, but this time, you feel this is a big enough deal to insist upon. If you don't think you can convince them to kick him out, then say it's time to establish some rules. If you eat it, you buy it. It wouldn't be unreasonable, given that he has a job, to ask that he pay SOME rent. Chances are, the moment rentt comes up, he'll mysteriously vanish, since couch dwelling is such a crummy situation, nobody'd actually want to pay for it. He won't actually wind up homeless- he clearly has other friends.
2006-10-29 10:21:42 · answer #2 · answered by kivrin9 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your friend he has to leave. You can also let the landlord know - the lease often states that there can be no other people living there without permission.
However, the best option, if your lease arrangement allows it, is to move out so you don't have to deal with any of them.
Have you considered that maybe the bf's friend is actually paying a portion of the rent to him and your friend? Maybe that's why they don't mind the "freeloader."
2006-10-29 02:23:32 · answer #3 · answered by picopico 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would tell your room-mates, since he is their friend, they can either cover the $$ amount rent- PLUS 100 a week for food that he eats- plus $$ for maid service and utilities, and household supplies, or tell him it is time to move.
Either way you expect payment in hand within 5 days, or him out!
You don't even know what this guy did to get kicked out of his gf's home...could have been something really bad!
BTW, he has been there a month that's long enough for him to be legally your roommate in some states..and you will have to go to court and have him evicted!
2006-10-29 02:18:59 · answer #4 · answered by kat k 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be assertive. If your name is not on the lease, move out. If your name is on the lease, then you need to tell him to get out. Put EVERYTHING in writing so you will have proof. Give copies to his friends. You might need to see Judge Judy.
Your roommates are not too cool. That is your home, not a shelter for the homeless.
2006-10-29 08:22:32 · answer #5 · answered by Lynda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest a group meeting. Explain that if he intends on staying he should show a bit more respect for the people who already live there and he should start contributing his fair share financially. Otherwise, it might be time for him to consider finding somewhere else. It'll be hard, but if you just try and force him out it might create friction between you and the other housemates which would make living there difficult. Hopefully, he'll either clean up his act or leave, either way the situation should hopefully improve.
Good luck!
2006-10-29 06:47:45 · answer #6 · answered by arcanehex 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can always get rid of him. Let the landlord know about the situation. Or if you feel threatened or uncomfortable you could move out and won't have to pay if you break the lease.
2006-10-29 02:18:42 · answer #7 · answered by smc197727 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time to have a talk with your roommates. Just tell them you didn't mind if he stayed for a few days but it's gone on for too long. Tell them you're losing sleep because he comes in late. Who pays for the food btw? If you're halfing it then tell them he's eating up your share of the food.
2006-10-29 02:14:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely time for an ultimatum-tell your friends it's you or him.
If you're on the lease the law's on your side-next time he's noisy or has unauthorized guests,call the cops. If you're not on the lease move out.
I myself would also rethink about my friend and her guy-do you really need friends who treat you this way?.
2006-10-29 04:27:16 · answer #9 · answered by barbara 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him simply that he may have over stayed his welcome. Maybe check out the classifieds or a website for some apartments that he can check out. Let him know that he needs to shape up and start paying some rent or you will be forced to kick him out anc all the authorities. because nobody likes have the authorities after them, now do they? lol
2006-10-29 02:21:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋