How can I keep my 3yr old from coming into my bed @ night?

Question

My son will go down in his bed but in the middle of the night after I'm asleep he'll sneak in and I won't realize this until morning. What can I do to change this? The bad part is most of the time I don't even realize it until morning. He does this about 90% of the time. Help!

Answer 1

Put a baby gate in his doorway that he cannot open, or if this makes you uncomfortable because he wont get out in an emergency...put a gate in your doorway. This way he can still call for you if he needs you but will stay in his bed. I had to do this with my son because he used to do the same thing..after about 2 weeks he started sleeping the night in his own bed and we didn't have any more problems.

Answer 2

First of all, ask him why he comes in your room in the middle of the night. Does he get cold? Is he lonely? Does he have bad dreams? It's essential that you address the problem.

Then, I'd do my best not to make him comfortable. So, tell him if he comes into your room at night, that he can sleep on the floor. (You can even put a pillow and blanket there for him.)

Also, you can try to give him rewards for not coming in. So, make a chart with 7 vertical squares. At the top, draw a castle. Tell him for every night that he sleeps in his own bed, he gets a sticker. Once he gets to the castle, he gets: a piece of candy, a small toy, etc.

Hang in there!

Answer 3

I haven't had this problem my self, I only have an 8 month old, but with my brothers my Mom would make a HUGE deal about them sleeping by themselves, like how they were such big boys, and they'd get a toy when they did it for like 2 weeks straight.. You know like a reward system...

Answer 4

My daughter used to do this too. We didn't have a baby gate anymore (at age 3) - so I tried something I read in a parenting book. I added a "body-pillow" between my husband and me to "crowd out" our daughter if she decided to climb in. After awhile it was just too uncomfortable for her and she gave up. You may find another way to achieve this. The book mentioned "accidentally - on purpose" crowding out the child - so whatever means works for you... give it a try.

Otherwise, the baby gate idea was also suggested in the book. My girlfriend tried this and warns you may need to prepare for an upset child who is miffed at the baby gate - If his upset wakes you (crying, whining, whatever) - just pretend you're still sleeping and he will give up on trying to come in sooner than if you notice he's upset about the baby gate and pay him any attention. :-)

If your son is having nightmares, however - the things that may be causing them need to be addressed so that he feels safe and secure at night. One of my older kids stayed in her room the whole night only when she got a night-lite. The one just older than her had no issues of any kind and had no need for a night-lite either.

Your pediatrician is also a good source of advice or suggestions (especially if they have their own kids).

Answer 5

lock your door, but tell him in advance that he is now a big boy, and he is no longer allowed to sleep in your bed. he will cry the firstfew nites, and you'll probably find him asleep outside yourdoor, but it will eventually work. or, you could just wait a few years until he sleeps through the night.

Answer 6

You can also put a lock on your bedroom door! Or maybe just some sort of noise maker that he would trigger when he walked in your room, that way you could wake up and make him go back to his own bed.

Answer 7

Does he sleep walk?

You can try to reason with him and offer some small rewards if he sleeps in his own bed. Set up some rules.

And maybe lock your doors. :)

Answer 8

be grateful he doesn't wake you. he just wants some company. why do you want him to stop? is he really hurting anything?

Answer 9

lock your bedroom door

Answer 10

be thankful that he doesn't wake you up!