Why does dating become so hard after thirty? Help! Lonely on the brink of desperation.?

Question

I have been single for a couple of years now and haven't been looking for a relationship but dang this single stuff is getting old and I can't fiind anyone that I like. The ones I like don't like me.
I'M SO DAMN LONELY!! And HORNEY as H*LL! I don't want to sleep with just anyone though. Getting a guy to sleep with is not the problem. Getting one I think is worth it is the ticket. Any advice would be appreciated.

Answer 1

I am single and over 30 and I also think it is difficult to find somebody special. The ones I really like are either married already or in long-term relationships. Not giving up because I know the right one will eventually come along, especially if I remain open and available, is what keeps me going in the dating world. I understand the horny part as well and make sure that if you find somebody to sleep with that it does not interfere in your quest to find that somebody special. Good luck.

Answer 2

finally someone in my boat, except ur a girl. it seems like the only ones out there this late in the game are losers, that no one else wanted.
i have been single for a little over a yr. after a 5 yr relationship.
I am not into the one night stands, i know, i am a guy and guys r pigs. sorry i don't fill that streotype.
i have to have a connection with the lady. i don't mind going to the bars, cause i am an out going person. alot of the women i meet in my age group are physco.
when i was younger being alone was not a big deal, but i figured i had plenty of time to find the rt person and get married. then one day i woke up in my 30s and realized i wasn't getting any younger.
yes the horny part can get mind blowing, its really bad on rainy days (don't know why, but the rain knocks my testosterone level threw the roof. somedays i wish some chick would walk in my bedroom and rape me lol.
i never thought i would hear myself say this, but what i miss is the hanging out and curling up next to a fire place in the winter. listening to the crackling of the fire.
being alone is one thing, but being lonely is quite another.
i feel for u honey.
when u find the answer let me know, best of luck

Answer 3

I have no real advice, just some observations. It would seem that you are circulating in the kind of environments that don't produce reciprocal attraction and that fulfillment for you is not in a one night stand, but rather a quality relationship. Have you thought about changing the environments in which you usually find yourself? Have you considered making some changes there? Maybe trying some new surroundings or new places to hang out would produce better results. If you want a quality relationship, you first need to be a quality person yourself, and then place yourself in environments where quality people are. Just some thoughts. Take it from there...

Answer 4

People look for those that are younger because not only od they have an increased sex drive, but they are less likely to want to be in a relationship. When you hit theirty, you're more likely to want to start settling down and having a family, rather than going out and partying.

That's why older people are stuck with speed dating, toy boys, and singles bars instead of night clubs. Guys just want to go out and have fun, and more often than not, they will go after the girls that they think their friends find attractive, rather than what they do. After all, a young man dating a 30 year old would be more than likely teased by his friends.

Don't worry about it. You don't need a guy to keep you happy. It's a natural reaction for people to want to seek out a partner and be with them, but don't make it your only priority. There are plenty of men out there that would want to be with you. You just have to get away from this computer and go and find them.

If you want any more advice or someone to talk to, then come and see me at http://www.phpbbserver.com/theconfidant/

Or email me at [e-mail]

There is plenty of info on my profile about the site, and there you will get more quality and in depth anwers than what you would find on Yahoo Answers.

Answer 5

I was recently asked this very question by a 26 year old female.
I didn't have the heart to tell her that at the age of 26 she has two kids from two different men one she never married and one she divorced shortly after the wedding. She smokes and cusses. Some winner huh? She is very pretty though so she gets lots of attention but nothing long term. Care to guess why? So to put it bluntly, take a good and honest look at yourself. Quality people attract quality mates, it's that simple. Otherwise, you have not yet outgrown your bad boy phase. If this is so, you soon will. Maybe.

Answer 6

Can I answer a question with a question?? Are you coming off as being desperate?

I've been trying the "on-line" thing and that is one thing I have noticed.....that there are a lot of desperate people out there - and that can be a real turn off! Make sure that you are "complete" before you try find someone - or you'll never find anyone that fits with you.

If you're up to wading through a lot of "mr. or ms. wrongs" - then you may just find someone as close as a mouse click away!

Answer 7

I am most definitely not on the brink of desperation when defending my girl, Sarah. She stands on her own two feet very well, thank you, and I admire her for who she is, her values, and her ability to speak out on a lot of things close to her heart. That's my girl right there...people should quit making fun of her. She's a righteous lady of character.

Answer 8

I wish I had some advice for you. I am at the other end of the 30 decade and the men get worse the older you get. They have more baggage, more problems, probably a divorce or two and some kids and money problems. They either are superficial players or so screwed up they project their acquired low opinion of women on every new woman they meet.

Answer 9

Honey it gets even worse at 40 all your peers in bitter divorces..all the men are bald and wanting 20ish girls and they cant even work their d i c k s anymore proably mostly from whacking to porn all their life or alcohol..find someone soon if you only 30...cause the pickens only get worse...finding yourself plz..give me a break if u dont know who u r by 30 u need a shrink..im sooo tired of hearing if u aint together.. u aint finding no one baloney ..you + him= 2 right..if u so damn wonderful and together guess u dont need anyone..and people who continously knock internet friendships ..well maybe they should stay out of yahoo questions then..if its not good enough for them ..honey u aint desperate your for real is all ...hope u find what your looking for....good luck oh by the way aint nothing wrong with lonely and horny all the men are....LOL

Answer 10

My advice is to start doing other things with your time and start going out by yourself. As women we never have that self confidence until we have a man. I do understand. Buy a good sex toy for the horniness. Date a guy would might not like. I did that and he need up being very good to me.