I am fourteen & i know I loved my boyfriend but I just couldn't act like it. He was so crazy about me &when he said he loved me i just couldn't say it because i felt stupid sayign "i love you too". I hated hugging him at school when he left or something because i just felt stupid--i'd see him tomorrow! what's the big deal?
i would make out with him & everything & he always wanted to be in physical contact with me but sometimes at school i stopped him because i know tons of people including adults at me school and he'd have his hand on my butt a lot &i know it makes other people uncomfortable sometimes.
so now he broke up with me because i treated him badly
now i have no idea why i was like that & i'm just wondering if anyone has ideas or if they have an idea of a way i can try not to be like that? because now he has another girlfriend but they're not working out. if they break up and i can change, he might take me back. so i really want to change. psychoanalyze me! help! thanks!
2006-10-28 15:38:37 · 7 answers · asked by Julia Q 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he didn't want to go any further physically than i did, and i can understand how some people would say i am still young. but that doesn't really help me. because i still feel the same way. i would never have sex with him or anything like that. but i had a real emotional connection with him--i told him pretty much everythign and he's the only one i could talk to about my real problems (when i was about 7 my mom had cancer). so this isn't just a little kid relationship, at least i don't think so.
2006-10-28 15:39:06 · update #1
Try something a little romantic, but it's a better idea to wait until he's broken up with this new girl, or she's going to hate you with a passion. Try a hadwritten letter. That way you don't have to do it face to face, but it's a hell of a lot more believable than just chatting to him over Yahoo or something.
And it's a nice thing to know that somebody has taken the time to sit down and hand write something for you.
But the most important thing I can say is don't change to suit his wants. He will have to accept you for who you are. Detail all this in the letter. Tell him that you really do care for him, but that you just feel a little uncomfortable in public. Many people do, so it's nothing to be ashamed of. I never got involved with anyone until I was almost 20 for that very reason, but now I have a beautiful daughter to speak of, and I'm only 26.
If he isn't willing to accept you for who you are, then he doesn't deserve someone like you.
If you need any more advice or support, I'm here for you. Check out my profile - You can contact me by email or instant message, and as you can see, I run a forum of similar use to Yahoo answers.
On it, you'll find a letter I wrote for someone to use in the relationship section. You can tweak that to your liking if you want, as that person ha slightly different concerns than you.
The forum can be found at http://www.phpbbserver.com/theconfidant/ if anyone is too lazy to go through my profile to find it.
2006-10-28 15:51:46 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Maul 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not an expert in relationships but, I can give you a little bit of advice. For feeling stupid by saying 'I love you too.' or hugging him before you left, find other ways to show that you love him. If you feel stupid, prove you love him in a way that makes you feel comfortable. Don't worry about feeling stupid or people watching you, just be in the moment with him. Though some things will make you feel stupid at times, you just kind of have to work through that to get to the other side. Good luck, hope it works out for you.
2006-10-28 15:49:59 · answer #2 · answered by angelchild130 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know the feelings you feel are very real. But did you ever stop to think why, you push him away? A little voice is telling you, you are not ready. If someone tells you they love you, and you simply cannot utter the words right back, you don't love them. You say he wont try to have sex with you, but he has puts his hand on your butt in front of everybody. You're only 14, you don't need boys to be happy.
2006-10-28 15:49:46 · answer #3 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i am in a similar situation where i loved my girlfriend with all my heart but she never acted like she loved me back and treated me bad so i broke up with her and she didnt realize what she had til she lost it. Similar to your situation. Well she called me up one day and said she was sorry and she promised she'd never act like that again and i still had feelings for her so of course i was willing to work it out. Simply stated: Call him. Try to apologize and start treating him good. If he loves u and still has feelings for u he will be willing to work it out. Trust me.
2006-10-28 15:43:38 · answer #4 · answered by Jae L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he broke up n u know why,,,,,, try givinh him another chance or get another with ur kind of attitude,,,,,,, n 14 to fall in love, that what i call puppy love....... U hv alot to learn rather than falling in love.
2006-10-28 15:43:47 · answer #5 · answered by harry d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grit your teeth and do what you have to do. If he means what you say he does, then you should explain it to him. If anyone would understand it should be him.
2006-10-28 15:45:53 · answer #6 · answered by Jack S. Buy more ammo! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's the one who's wrong. he has to understand that you don't like your butt touched in public.
2006-10-28 15:42:17 · answer #7 · answered by Toilet-Duck88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋