I live with my boyfriend who I totally adore and I am 6 months pregnant with his child. The trouble is that even though he treats me well and says he loves me, his behaviour is driving me nuts. He hides his mobiles and pda from me. I wondered why this could be so I checked out his phone bills. As well as calling a female friend at least 5 times each day that he has told me he hardly ever speaks to (this female friend also happens to have fancied him for the last 18 months), there is another number that he always calls, late at night, and has video conversations with. I have questioned him about this, and he gets very defensive and won't speak about it. There are lots of other things too that have happened, too many to mention. If I wasn't pregnant I would have left by now, so now I don't know what to do because if I leave I will have to move out and move back in with my mum who lives 200 miles away, which would mean losing my job and maternity pay. I need advice
2006-10-28 12:12:17 · 14 answers · asked by Sophie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think you answered your own question, in that you said if you were not pregnant, you would leave. I think it's pretty clear. that he's cheating on you. Leave him. You may be able to find a roommate in the same town so that you don't have to move back in with your mother, and you can keep your job and maternity pay.
As for the other person who suggested that you may be reacting the way you are due to your raging pregnancy hormones, don't buy that. You are reacting the way anyone would act when the person he/she loves is being dishonest and unfaithful. That he is chatting with other women is not a figment of your imagination, and has NOTHING to do with your hormones. It's a fact, and doesn't bode well for the future
Good luck to you and your baby
2006-10-28 12:31:03 · answer #1 · answered by asil64 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Keep in mind you are 6 months pregnant, so you have raging hormones........don't make any major decisions until you have thought long and hard about it. Don't jump to conclusions. If you are absolutely sure there is something wrong or if he admits it then that is different. You say you love him.....give him the chance and try to work on things before giving up. You shouldn't necessarily stay with him just because of the baby, but the baby should make you think about things alot more before you do decide to leave. 200 miles is along way from a daddy.
2006-10-28 19:19:17 · answer #2 · answered by Michelle G 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Lets seriously take a moment and think about what you just wrote. Ok, why don't you just read it yourself a few times, as if it were another person asking, and what would your advice be? As I always say, what you tolerate, you cannot change. What are you willing to tolerate? Seriously! So your pregnant?! You have some serious things to think about. If YOUR child came to you with this exact same question, what would your advice be as a parent? Make your child proud, and he/she will do the same for you one day!
2006-10-28 20:30:36 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dont waste your life! You can do much better,,just think of you and your baby.
If he can lie to you while you pregnant, He,s no good.
Talk to your mum.
This should be a happy time, you shouldnt be worrying.
He,s not worried is he.
You will be mummy soon, the last thing you need is stress.
You got years of that to come! (only joking)
Be strong x
Good luck x
2006-10-29 01:02:06 · answer #4 · answered by NIcole 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl, am sorry to say, but you need to leave this guy! I can understand your worries about moving out and such, but you need to find a trusting and caring place for you and your baby.
You don't have to move in with your mum and lose your job, please don't panic!
Check the adds, see what kind of appartment is available and affordable for the next few months. After your child is born, you still have time to look out for something better.
Tell your boyfriend that he is supposed to support you, not getting you in worries or doubt......... and move out.
You may email me if you need a long-distance friend.
2006-10-28 19:25:38 · answer #5 · answered by Endie vB 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
dont stay with him jus bcos ur pregnant something dodgy is obviously goin on, leave him go live wi ur mum she will understand, and i'm sure no matter wat happens money isnt ur biggest issue, its the fact tht u dont wana leave him, first tell him ur goin t leave unless he tells u wats goin on if he doesnt admit to anything, he aint worth it, if he's goin t lie to u while ur 6 months pregnant wi his kid am sorry t say but hes a wanker, an ur best off leavin as soon as possible, he'll realise wen he as to travel t c his own kid, if he can be arsed cos he sounds lyk a rite un, u an ur baby will manage an ur mum will help u, ur baby will b betta off wi out a dick like tht in his life, jus go down out of his way. if he eva cared bout u . he'll soon come runnin
2006-10-28 21:11:23 · answer #6 · answered by kelly_louise_88 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Obviously, your boyfriend is not ready for a real relationship and he is a coward. I believe that men will be men and they will cheat no matter what! Don't give up! Move to a friends house or try to find a room for rent just for a little while, show him that you don't need his cr#*. If there is a will there is a way!
2006-10-28 19:21:04 · answer #7 · answered by lady93534 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I suggest you go to see this woman and tell her that yo need to know whats going on..you dont need this stress..its not fair on you and the baby.
2006-10-28 20:02:34 · answer #8 · answered by fajita 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
leave there is obviously no trust between you when he hides his mobile and you check it when you find it. finda flat/apply to local housing authority. keep your job put the maintenance from him towards childcare so you can keep on working
2006-10-28 19:16:31 · answer #9 · answered by enamouredphoenix 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋
HAVE A BREAK AND LET HIM KNOW HE NEEDS TO CHANGE HIS WAYS... LIKE GROWING UP AND BECOMING A FATHER. YOU DONT NEED 2 KIDS LOVE. X
2006-10-28 20:11:56 · answer #10 · answered by emz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋