yo momma!!?

Question

has anyone made someone cry or get really made using a mamma joke

what was the joke

Answer 1

haha yeah! oh i've got lots too, heres some yo momma jokes:

Yo mama is so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the bathroom scale.

Yo Mama is like a bus, she's big she doesn't smell very good and it's only a dollar to ride.

Yo Mama is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a species will be extinct.

Yo Mama is so stupid, she bought a video tape on how to fix your VCR!

Yo Mama is so fat that she got baptized at Sea World!

Yo mama's so dumb, she stuck the phone up her a** and thought she was makin' a booty call.

Yo mama's underwear is so full of holes that every time she farts they whistle.

Yo Mama is so fat, the highway patrol made her wear ''Caution! Wide Turns!''

Yo mama is so hairy that she has to part the hair on her butt in order to go to the bathroom.

Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!

Yo Mama is ugly she put the Boogie man outta business.

Yo Mama is ugly she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt

Yo Mama is uglywhen she wobbles down the street in September, folk say, "Damn it, can't believe it's Halloween already..."

Yo Mama is uglywhen she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'

Yo Mama is ugly she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure!

Yo Mama is ugly minutes after she was born her Mother shouted 'What a treasure!" and her Poppa said "Yes, now let's go and bury her..."

Yo Mama is ugly they push her face into the dough mixture when making Monster cookies.

Yo Mama is ugly when they took her to the Beautician it took 10 hours....and that was just for the quote!

Yo Mama is ugly yer Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesny have to kiss her goodbye...

Yo Mama is ugly she put Marilyn Manson out of business.

Yo Mama is ugly she was a guard at Snake Mountain

Yo Mama is ugly they knew what time she was born cuz her face stopped the clock...

Yo Mama is ugly even Harry Knowles refused to date her.

Yo Mama is ugly they embalmed her face on a box of super-strength laxatives and sold it empty!

Yo Mama is ugly she gets 364 extra days just to dress up for Halloween.

Yo Mama is ugly Tony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday.

Yo Mama is ugly you papa throws the ugly stick and she goes fetches it every time.

Yo Mama is uglyshe scared the stitching outta Frankenstein.

Yo Mama is ugly we had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her.

Yo Mama is ugly I heard yer Father first met her at the Zoo.

Yo Mama is ugly her shadow gave up.

Yo Mama is ugly people at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her...

Yo Mama is ugly her mom had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her.

Yo Mama is ugly when born, the doctors had to fit her incubator with tinted windows.

Yo Mama is ugly hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats.

Yo Mama is ugly instead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck.

Yo Mama is ugly they gave her a middle name...'accident'.

Yo Mama is ugly she fell out of the Ugly Tree, hitting every branch on the way down.

Yo Mama is ugly when she walked into the Haunted House, she came back out with a Job Application!

Yo Mama is ugly even Slicky Willy Clinton refused to sleep with her...

Yo Mama is ugly when she was born the Doc smacked her face.

Yo Momma so Ugly that she's got her very own Crazy Pranks & Hilarious Gags named after her...

Yo Poppa so ugly he turned Medusa to Stone.

Yo Postman so freakin ugly he made the guard dogs **** themselves.

Yo Dentist so ugly they don't need anasthetics

Yo Boss so ugly people go as him for halloween.

Yo Priest so ugly that he have to give his Sermon from inside the Confessional Box.

Yo Teacher so ugly when she walks into the Building Society they turn off the CCTV cameras.

Yo Sister so Ugly that George Lucas cast her in Star Wars 3 as Jabbas wife - without the need for a costume.

Your kid bro so ugly that for Halloween he tricks or treats on his mobile phone!

Your Kid sister so d**n ugly that when she sits on a sand dune at the beach, the cats try to bury her.

You cousin so ugly that when he threw a boomerang, it refused to come back.

Yo Driving Instructor's so ugly he has to wear a ski-mask when teaching.

Your Girlfriend's so insanely ugly that I can screw her in any position and it's still Doggy-style!

Yo Girlfriend so ugly they put her in the Chimp enclosure to stop the Chimpanzee's from jerking off!

Yo' Father so ugly that his American Express card left home without him...

Yo Sister's so ugly that she must been conceived on the Motorway - ain't that where most accidents happen?

Yo Dog walker so ugly that he once took your Mutt to Crufts and WON - oh, the dog came second...

Your sister so god awful ugly that Durex want to use her as a poster child.

Yo Father's so ugly his hairline ain't receding...it's his hair that's running away from his ugly noggin.

You Grandma's so Ugly her Shrink makes her lie face down on the couch.

Your Grandpa so freakin ugly that when he gets up in the mornin, the Sun goes down.

Yo' Mum so ugly that even Prince Charming refuses to kiss her - he'd rather live as a frog.

Yo older sister so ugly that Mommy had to feed her with a fishing rod.

Yo Uncle so astonishingly ugly that whenever he comes over and goes to your bathroom, the toilet flushes.

Your Dog's so ugly as yo Momma that I had to shave its **** and make it walk backwards...

Yo mama's so ugly, hold on....you got a mirror handy???

Yo Mama's sister so ugly that Blind men refuse to have s*x with her.

Yo Uncle so ugly, Spielberg wants him in Addams Family 3

Your kid so ugly the Doctor is STILL smacking his ***.

Yo Mother in law so hellishly ugly, that president George W Bush is considering making ugliness a crime, punishable by the electric chair

Yo Momma's so ugly that she hurt my feelings...

Your doctor's so ugly she manages to give Freddy Kreuger Nightmares!

Yo Mama so old she left her purse on Noah's Ark.

Yo Mama so old Jurassic Park brought back the memories...

Yo Mama so old when she ran the 100 metre dash, they timed her with a sundial.

Yo Mama so old she still owes Moses a dollar.

Yo Mama so old when she was at school...there was No history class!

Yo Mama so old she uses her hot flushes to heat her cup of Tea

Yo Mama so old she co-wrote the 4th Commandment.

Yo Mama so old when I asked for her ID she handed me a rock

Yo Mama so old she even made Yoda jealous.

Yo Mama so old she recalls when the Grand Canyon was a ditch.

Yo Mama so old the fire department are on standby when you light her birthday cake

Yo Mama so old when she gave birth, You came out with Dentures.

Yo Mama so old she sat in front of Jesus in 1st grade

Yo Mama so old her first job was as Cain and Abel's baby-sitter.

Yo Mama so old her birthday expired.

Yo Mama so old when Moses parted the Red Sea, he found yo momma fishing on the other side!

Yo Mama so old she got the first copy of the Ten Commandments.

Yo Mama so old she invented these Crazy Pranks & Hilarious Gags

Yo Grandpa so old his social security number is 000-000-001

Yo Priest so old he's got Adam and Eve's autograph

Yo Archeology Professor so old we found cave drawings of her.

Your Wife getting so old she startin to fart out Mummy dust

You Postman so d**n old his zip code is 00001.

Yo' geeky Star Wars friend so old he used to baby sit Yoda

Yo Doctor so old he uses chewing gum as a bandaid.

Yo hairdresser so old she used to cut Betty Rubble's hair

You so old you used to gang bang wid the Flintstones

Yo' home helper so old she was once a waitress at the last supper

Yo Grannie so old Spielberg hired her as historical consultant on Jurassic Park

Yo Nana so old she the only Creature in Jurassic Park they never had to animate

You Gardener so old she uses T-Rex dropping as fertilizer.

Yo History teacher so d**n old he was co-author of the Dead Sea scrolls

Your Aunties so old that when God said 'let there be light', she was the one flicking on the light switch.

Yo Math teacher so old he baby-sat for Pythagorus

Yo Minister so old he used to get sermon tips from Zeus.

Yo Bookie so old he offered odds of 4 to 1 on Adam eating the apple

Yo Poppa so old and ugly they call him Captain Caveman

Yo sister so old she's more ancient than everything seen on the Antiques Road Show

Yo Mother in law so old she the only one at the old folks home with a senior citizens discount.

Yo Papa so ancient that Mel Gibson hired him to offer insights on what life was like with William Wallace

I told yo big sister to act her own age...and she died.

You Dog so old it farts out dust.

Yo Boyfriend so old his birth certificate says "Expired" on it.

Yo Computer geek friend so old he used to babysit Pascal

Your Girlfriend's so old, she invented the term 'oldest profession in the world'

Yo momma so ancient she's in Jesus's yearbook!

Yo Gardener's so d**n old he remembers when the Garden of Eden was just a plant

Yo big brother so old, he used to run Track with dinosaurs.

Your mother-in-law so freakin old she's got Roman Numerals on her birth certificate

Yo Mamma's feet so skanky that when your family wants jam pieces, she gets yo brother to run a loaf of bread between her toes.

Yo Grannies neck so d**n wrinkled, I use it as a cheese grater.

I got notin bad to say about Yo Momma - heck, her face says it all...

Your pet Cat so freakin nasty it bit my dog and gave it rabies.

Yo Auntie so stinkin that a skunk smelled her butt and passed out.

Yo mama's so poor, TV dinner trays are her good china.

D**n it, just realised that last yo is as old as the crust in yo Sister's knickers...

You liked that mama joke didn't ya? Good?...well, nowhere near as good as Yo Mama was last night :)

But, hey, if I wanted a comeback, christ, I'd just wipe it off Yo Mamma's chin...

Yo Mama like a television - even a 2 year old can turn her on!

You brother so hairy Big foot is taking his picture..

Yo Mother in law so stinky she use Right Guard and Left Guard.

Your Grandpa's so hairy, Jane Goodall follows him around.

Yo Star wars geeky friend so d**n hairy, she's a stunt double for Chewbacca and her baby daughter played the leader of the Ewoks (no makeup needed).

Yo English teacher so d**n stupid, she failed a kindergarden spelling survey...

Yo Sista like a mailbox, open all day and all night...

Yo mama's so clumsy, she got tangled up in a Mobile phone.

Yo mama's like an elevator - blokes go up and down on her all day. Yo Mother in law so dmamnd Dislexus when I told her to go get some Head and Shoulders...she jump on top of me Shoulders and gave me head!!!

Your IM buddies so d**n stanky, I can smell them over the interweb

Only job yo ever gonna get is as a blind bird-watcher.

Yo idiotic Doctor so d**n greasy that he uses Bacon as a bandaid

Yo Dog so short it's best friend is an Ant.

Yo Auntie so flat chested she jealous of the wall.

Yo girlfriend so cheap I threw her a penny for s*x and she gave me change...

The first line in the Bible was mistranslated - it actually reads - 'In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth and yo' fat ugly Mama'

Yo Grandpa's house so d**ned cold, the Roaches ice skate around the kitchen.

Yo Momma house so small that I put my Key in the doorlock and broke the freakin back window!

I heard yo mama got fired from her job at the sperm bank - the boss caught her drinking on the job...

Yo baby sista's nose so long, it make Steffi Graf jealous...

Yo Mam so d**n ugly, look like the ho was hit by the whole freakin Ugly Tree!!!

Yo Mama so old - heck, the first line of the Koran was mistranslated - it should read 'All praise is due to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds and Father of Yo' Mama'...

I heard that yo Granny was so disgustingly ugly that on a holiday to Egypt she looked up a Camel's a** and scared the hump off of it!

Yo Driving Instructor so d**n old he got hieroglyphics on his Driver license.

Yo Cousin so old she drives a chariot to High school

I took yo Mama to the Doctor's - I tell him that she feeling poorly and that she only got 1 toe and 1 knee. Doc tells me she's contracted 'Tony'...

Yo Boss so damn ugly that when he leaned out the window the Police arrested him for attempted murder

That Grandpa of your's so stupid and poor that when I came over for Dinner he read me recipes...

Yo wee brother so damn hairy that he went for a short back and sides and lost 30 pounds...

Yo mama's chest hair so d**n long, it growing all the way down to her willy.

Yo mama's so nice, she offered me the hair off her back.

Yo Mother in law so nasty, she got more clap than an auditorium.

I's apologise for talkin bout Yo Mama...I should know better...hell, I don't even know the Man...

No seriously, under all that hair yo Mama is really a Saint....a saint Bernard!

But really, yo Mamma is just like a golf course - everybody gets a hole in one!

Yo Nana still so fat she wears a Microwave as a beeper.

And yo Mother-in-law so huge she stole my pillow cases when she ran outta socks.

Yo mama should be locked away, cos every time she moons people they turn into werewolves

She nasty too ya know - yo daddy just got out of hospital after eating her out - he caught food poisoning...

Yo'momma so ugly she actually is very good at her job: Being a scarecrow.

Yo mama so stupid and clumsy, she got tangled in a cordless phone.

Yo Moma sooooo ugly, I could have been yo Daddy but the dog beat me under the fence!

I heard that Yo mama is on the warpath - she lost a finger and now can't count past 9...

Yo sister is so stupid - I just aks her about her X-Men and she said: "Well, my first baby's daddy was Jimmy...and I still see Johnny on Fridays...."

Yo Papa's like an old arcade machine - toss in a quarter and you can play with his joystick.

Yo mama such a b**ch, she interned for Clinton.

Answer 2

I did, i was the one crying, it was a Yo Mamma's so old, she was born i black and white... but i cried because my mother is old...VERY old, and sick.. and it's not funny if it's true.

Answer 3

Ya actually i made a boy cry. I didn't know he was that sensitive.

Answer 4

i just wanted two points