I don't even know where to even start! I have known my friend for a year now. We have both had a topsy turvey year and thats how we ended up getting close to each other.
Of late I have developed very strong feelings for her, but I am not sure how she feels. Having been in a similar situation 2 years ago and lost some one dear to me after I finally told her, I don't want to fo through the same thing again.
Thoughts?
2006-10-28 03:58:37 · 21 answers · asked by Never learnt a thing! 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Easier said than done isn't it. You need to get some sort of vibes to do something like that.
But how do you know you are not confusing them with her feelings for you as a mate?
2006-10-28 04:01:27 · update #1
Well seems like she is acting bit strange as well... for someone who I met atleast twice a week as spoke to every day, I haven't seen her in 2 weeks and hardly spoken to her
2006-10-28 04:06:53 · update #2
best of friends definitely...
but again past precedent was I waited for 4 years to tell the other gal and only brought it up after she said she was thinking about it as well. however decided against giving it a go as we were in diff countries as we had been for the majority of the period earlier. never thought i would see her just once in the ensuing 2 years though we must have been in the same town about 8 times!
2006-10-28 04:14:13 · update #3
Friends with benefits can be cool, but just keep in mind where you want to relationship to be and stay. Love can growth stronger with this, thus emotions will take place...follow your first mind(the one upstairs). Good luck
2006-10-28 04:01:21 · answer #1 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough one.
Especially since it has happened to you once before, I can understand why you would be weary of making another move.
You know her well enough. Does she like someone else? Is she steady with someone else? Is there a close friend of hers you could trust in asking? And, when I say trust I mean that the friend does not go a blab it to her.
If not just plan an evening out together having fun. After you have had a great time together, laughing and doing things you like to do just mention to her that you really enjoyed the evening more than you ever thought you would. Tell her that you are experiencing feelings for her you have not experienced before and let it go from there. Explain to her that her friendship has made it possible for you to feel this way and you would not want to loose it for anything.
Chances are it would not happen twice, ya think?
Good luck.
Now, get going and plan a fun evening!
2006-10-28 11:00:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell her yet. Give the two of you more time to become best of friends and then see what develops. I married my best friend and we are going on 21 years. If he had come to me with his feelings before I was ready, I probably would have pulled away. He says he knew he wanted me from the beginning, but it took me awhile longer as I had had a couple of rough years and it just took me time to be ready for love again.
On the other hand, if she comes to you with feelings for you then be honest with her and tell her how you feel. If you are meant to be together, the two of you will figure it out together.
My mom used to use the cliche "When in doubt, don't." I teased her about it, but she was right. If you are not sure, wait until you are.
2006-10-28 11:09:08 · answer #3 · answered by Kate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi. Also sounds you are a little vulnerable as well after not the best of times? Perhaps lonely or not feeling so good about yourself at the moment?
Either way, I suggest you both just enjoy eachother at the mo. Have some good times together and don't try to think too much! Relax and just see where it goes!
Happy Times
2006-10-28 11:14:06 · answer #4 · answered by Ade Babe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yah I know what you mean. It can be frustrating when you have feelings for someone and you dont know what they are thinking about the situation. I would just say dont rush into any questions or anything. Let things happen on its own time.
Example: I have been dating my boyfriend thats in the military for almost 6 months. I movied up to idaho and he is down in Diego. It was really hard having a long far away relationship. He called me up one night and just wanted to be friends and wanted all his stuff back. He also asked for his cell phone back. at that time I didnt call him I didnt text him like at all. just in the morning to say good morning and in the afternoon to ask how he was doing. and thats all. when it came to send his phone back. I text him say.
" Im going to send your phone. So you wont be able to text me at all tonight because it will be on its way to you.
after a long wait with no response. He text me back by saying, just keep it so I can text you. So I still have the phone. weeks later the longer I didnt really write him. He started writing me saying he missed me and that he did love me and he couldnt see himself dating other girls. Now his coming up for christmas and he says he has something really big to give me.
I know its not your situation but Im just saying, Let things take time and things will start to fall into place
2006-10-28 12:00:35 · answer #5 · answered by allie laught alot 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a difficult question. You need to determine if how you feel is worth risking your friendship. Most likely your friend is feeling the same way about you, but scared as well. Is your friend understanding? If she is your best friend you should be able to talk to her about any and everything, right? I'd say go for it. Carpe Diem!!!
2006-10-28 11:11:36 · answer #6 · answered by TRUST_ME 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not rush in and say something, i would give it a few more weeks and see if your feelings have changed, if they have not than i would do something, perhaps write a letter and tell her how you feel, but i would highlight that if she does not feel the same for you than you would not want this to affect your friendship.
It something that you may regret by not asking her but than if she says no than you know that you have tried and hopefully you will have no regrets and your friendship wont be affected.
good luck
2006-10-28 11:06:53 · answer #7 · answered by blondegirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell her. Let the relationship develop and become the best of friends. She has to trust you and totally feel comfortable around you. If it's meant to happen over time you'll know.
2006-10-28 11:00:40 · answer #8 · answered by Stella Bing 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Wait it out and see if she conveys her feelings to you more.
Sometimes you just gotta put your feelings out there and on the line to get what you want.
Go for it. Live your life.
2006-10-28 11:00:50 · answer #9 · answered by PrInCeSs P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is a sure fire way of knowing if there is any chance of more then friendship. if she talk about others guys she like, been with, is with, or wants to be with, there is no chance. you are simply a friend. if she hasnt, dont waste anymore time. go for it!
2006-10-28 11:01:57 · answer #10 · answered by marcvialli 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋