in times of crisis?

Question

if you read the question that i posted yesterday saying " i didnt do anthing" you can get the whole story. after the whole story happened i talked with my bf and told him what has happened and he was of course mad and furious. he kept on telling me how he is not mad since i did not lie to him but rather told him the truth but the problem that he has is that i should of thought and expected every single situation and that i could of avoided it except that i did not. he called me yesterday and twice today-that is good i guess- but there is so much tension between the two of us on the phone! to keep myself from crying or thinking that the relationship will be called quits or to forget everything i went and worked out and cleaned my dorm and did my homework and broke down into tears 4 times today! i have lost my appetite because of the whole thing, eat 2 vs. 4 meals a day, work out to take my stress out, and am so miserable! i feel like i am my lowest low and cannot concentrate for skool.

i have a busy week with monday and a quiz and more quizzes and tests but can barely concentrate and focus for my subjects! i feel as though i messed up bad times and i keep on crying and hoping that everything will be okay but it will not! at 22 you know that loving someone only to hurt them is th worst part of love! i never wanted to hurt my bf in any shape orform and if anyone out there actually believes that i love him thank you...i need some words of wisom in the time of crisis i am going thru right now! i know that others have it worse than me and am thankful for the life that i have and know that oter people in Africa have things like water and food to worry about! i just need some reassuring words...i cannot sleep, i am epileptic and lack of sleep=chance of having a seizure, i am miserable and sistant towards my bf..

Answer 1

Well, i read the other part, you need to find a place to relax, be it by yourself or with your bf. If with your bf (if you can), you need to let him know what stress you are going through, and the fact you DIDN'T cheat on him..i mean damn you TOLD him the situation in depth....would a woman who cheats tell? Besides you said you tried not to....he needs to understand that...i mean **** if my fiance told me some guy got too close and he kissed her, yea i'd be pissed, but i know it wasn't her fault, personally i'd rather know who the F*cking homewrecker is so i can whoop his azz. It's punkass mofos like that who ruin the good relationships that are so rare now.
And I know the whole bit about having guy friends, but i'm sorry, having guy friends will eventually give you this kind of probelm if you're with someone....cause you have many of the dudes that are you friend for the sake of something more..not just friends.
So right now your main focus is you, trust me i've been through it before, i was in college full time, had 2 jobs, and dealt with an asshole roomate....stuff gets stressful, and no sleep is a college thing love, 4 hours of sleep was the most i ever got.
But find peaceful spots, complete solitude to people, and if you can take your bf.....if he really loves you he'd understand, and suck it up cause you didn't cheat on him, you just ran into situations that can be better avoided if you AVOID hanging out with dudes by yourself all the time....at least go in groups, or go with a friend, but by yourself is ASKING for these kinds of things to happen.
As for your bf, you can't make anyone love you, and things happen for a reason i suppose, it IS his choice to be mature and deal with it, or just lost trust and end it. For YOUR sake, if he's gonna be mr. poutty face....then you might as well call it quits, that's unwanted stress that's unnecessary. Otherwise, you give him the benefit of the doubt, you did your part, you told the truth, you wanted trust so you kept nothing secret, so if he can't deal with it...it's not your fault, it's his....it wasn't like you just up and SCREWED the dude and he just so happen to catch you....no it was a mistake, you of course tried to stop it, and then you told the truth, as a mature and decent person would.....so don't feel sad or feel bad.....actually feel PROUD, cause a lot of women....hell PEOPLE can't say they can do that.....you are the rare few that actually have any ballz to take up for their mistakes and responsibilities, **** my hats off to you....he got issues if he can't deal with it as far as i'm concerned...i'd of appreciated the hell out of the fact you told me....and would've forgiven you as such.
So no stress, just tests, and your happiness....k? Good luck.

Answer 2

I hope you will feel better soon!