My parents are Baptists and they raised me to be a Christian. How do I tell them that I don’t believe in God?
2006-10-27 21:58:58 · 29 answers · asked by zaradulce02 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I'm 23 and I don't live with my parents. We don't even live in the same state.
2006-10-29 16:19:33 · update #1
Why do you feel the need to break their hearts? I don't believe in God but become "saved" over and over to make my mother and fanatical brother happy. It keeps peace and I know who and what I am.
As a non-believer, I don't have any need to hurt people. A friend once asked me..."Do you know what is true?" And the honest answer was, "No, not always...I get it wrong sometimes." Then he asked me, "Do you know what is kind?" I could absolutely say, "Yeah, I know what is kind but sometimes being kind isn't honest." My friend said, "Well...do what you know."
Maybe the Japanese philosophy is right...politeness is more important than honesty. Honesty isn't always honest but often rude.
I wouldn't tell them...they'll figure it out and begin making your life miserable soon enough anyway.
Just a little aside, I sort of feel the same way about gays "coming out of the closet". Why hurt people? ...you know what you are, are happy with it and content with yourself...why bash people over the head with it if they aren't ready for "enlightenment"?. Don't rush people to catch up with you...if they don't get it, they don't get it. Let them be. It just seems kinder to me.
NOW, if you're asked, that's a different question...Tell them if they ask. If they ask, they are ready for an answer. (My mother and brother would NEVER ask me, "Are you an athiest?" because they know they could not handle the truth of the answer, so I don't volunteer the answer unless they ask.)
2006-10-27 22:14:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
You could try this.
"Mom. Dad. I'm gay."
Let them freak out then say "Kidding, I'm really an atheist!"
Maybe not. Um... may I ask your age? No disrespect, but what does it matter how your parents are affected by it? If you think they'll never speak to you again because of it, weigh whether or not your confession is worth losing your parents. It might be easier to pretend, just to keep the peace. I know that sounds unfair to you, but it's your folks you're talking about here.
2006-10-27 22:06:07 · answer #2 · answered by ReeRee 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, I've managed to avoid this one myself for many years now. Is it necessary to tell them? My parents know that I don't go to church. I think they secretly hope or pretend that I still believe on some level. If that's what they choose to believe, then why tell them otherwise? Do you think they really need to know for some reason in particular? Maybe you're closer with your parents than I am.
2006-10-27 22:02:51 · answer #3 · answered by Jon M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is no reason to tell them. If you want to tell them, just tell them if the conversation brings it up. If they are very sad, tell them that you are still a good person, you do want to live with the christian principles (helping people, etc), but not because god says so, because of your personal humanistic beliefs.
2006-10-27 22:02:50 · answer #4 · answered by cpinatsi 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Explain that you've learned enough about science to make a decision on your own. Tell them that you feel as if they had made the choice for you prior to your choice.
Tell them you know right from wrong and what it takes to be a good person. Tell them you appreciate all the morals and values that they and christianity have taught.
You can also ask them how they'll find Bliss in Heaven knowing that that you'll be burning in hell for denying the holy spirit. Then maybe they will open their eyes toward atheism as well. :-)
2006-10-27 22:01:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
There is no easy way. Just tell them that you are grateful for the upbringing, that you still believe in doing what you feel is right, and that for you this includes not believing. They may cry, complain, and rail but in the end they will still love you. You will never cease to be their child.
2006-10-27 22:05:42 · answer #6 · answered by Debra M. Wishing Peace To All 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, sometimes it is just best to leave well enough alone, and not tell them. If you feel it will interfere with your relationship with them, don't just straight up tell them, that's a hasty choice. Just either slowly ease into it, or don't at all, it is your personal choice, so keep it personal, nobody needs to know, unless you really want/need them to. But lol, good luck if you do decide to.
2006-10-27 22:04:32 · answer #7 · answered by Fuzz 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why do you have to go and tell them? Wait for an occasion and play it down.Keep in mind that belief or non-belief is just belief, not a matter of argument. You never know when and how the a would drop.
2006-10-27 22:02:30 · answer #8 · answered by Rajesh Kochhar 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why should you? It's none of their business whether you believe or not. It's the same reason I don't go broadcasting to everyone that I know that I'm a witch (only two people in my entire family know for sure). Because it's no ones business but my own.
2006-10-27 23:51:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
This really isn't that easy to answer, not knowing about you or them? Are you an adult? Are they elderly? Are they trying to force you into relgious activities? How close you are to your parents? Etc.
Consider whether telling them is the best thing for ALL involved, yourself included, or whether just not saying anything at all is better.
2006-10-27 22:07:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋