I am 5'7" and my girl friend is 5'8.5". She is quite cool with it but sometimes I kinda find it embarrassing to kiss her when she is in her heels. Would it be appropriate to ask her not to wear high heels?
2006-10-27 19:07:54 · 17 answers · asked by togo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This is not an uncommon situation. Those that are "macho" and need to feel superior to their female companion would not do such a thing. I will show you my bias here: this is but one way to separate the men from the boys. The latter would not take the social risk to date a taller woman.
It seems clear that she likes her heels, or she wouldn't wear them. However, why not tell her how you feel? You could even test the waters: "If I ever felt embarassed about the difference in our heights, would you want to know about it?"
Encourage her to speak honestly with you. After all, you wouldn't want her to change her style of dress just for you if she were uncomfortable with it, would you?
Perhaps this kind of discussion could bring you two closer, although there is a risk involved in such a conversation.
The great news is-- she's cool with it! Lucky you! Perhaps you might try to catch up with her! (:-> -- and not just regarding her physical height, but in her ability to transcend convention for the sake of happiness and love. Perhaps you can try to take a page out of her book by cultivating these "higher" values.
--Which is not to put down your feelings. However, as far as decisions go, it is all a matter of priorities.
Try taking an even bigger risk, and ask yourself what it is about this situation that is embarassing to you? Perhaps this is your chance to conciously CHOOSE your values, rather than simply being run by your "programming."
2006-10-27 19:41:25 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think so. She's a few inches above average for a girl, and you're a couple below average for a guy. She definitely does NOT need to be wearing high heels (and no one else does either, if you ask me). Just tell her that you feel uncomfortable when she wears heels. If she appreciates you, she will have no problem doing such a simple thing to make you comfortable with her. Or you could find a shorter girlfriend. I don't think I would have dated her in the first place either, because I'm barely taller than you. It's just way uncomfortable. But if you get along with her otherwise, you should stay with her because it can be difficult to find a woman who you can get along with. Good night!
2006-10-27 19:15:20 · answer #2 · answered by anonymous 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well in my family this is very common we are all very tall (I should say except me I am the shortest at 5'7.5", the next female that comes close is my sister who is 5'10"!) The woman in my family mostly range from 5'10" - 6'3" this happens all the time. I'm currently dating someone that is only 1 inch taller then me. He requested that I didn't wear heals, actually by saying (when I had flats on), "Wow baby I like it when you don't wear heals. makes me feel tall!" Didn't bother me in the least! I just stopped wearing heels around him!! My girlfriend married a man the same height as her she threw out every heel in her closet for the same reason. It's not that big of a deal but it's all in the delivery.
2006-10-27 19:34:24 · answer #3 · answered by Little Nell 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, I'd ask her if it bothers her that she has to bend down to kiss you. She'll probably be nice and say no. There's no shame in her being taller. How often does she wear high heels? If it's a lot, I'd just maybe say something in a joking way like, "Wow, you're harder to reach!" Play it off like it's funny, hopefully it won't be offending.
2006-10-27 19:13:43 · answer #4 · answered by irish_mick_25 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think so, pal. Get over it. If she isn't intimidated by you being short, just enjoy the situation. One of my fondest memories is of being with a woman who was not only tall but big-boned. She had as much as half a foot on me (I really no longer remember) but she was a lot of fun. While you might run into problems as a dance couple, intimacy is a whole new ball game. Get into the game, man. If you are a dancer, well let her twirl you or even lift you. That could really test how well you can dance, and personally I would think the attention that the two of you might draw could bring you closer together.
2006-10-27 19:23:18 · answer #5 · answered by OldMan1944 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Probably more common than you would think. I dated two different women that were taller, but it was a non-issue for either of us. Where there is a will , the is a way.... you'll get past this
2006-10-27 19:17:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't say something like "wow you're hard to reach" she will take that offensively. Just ask her if she could please not wear high heels because you find it hard to kiss her. She probably won't take that the wrong way.
2006-10-27 19:20:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I am only 5'6 and I've had girlfriends who were well over 6 feet tall. Hell there was no kissing standing up and only one was strong enough to lift me up while we were standing up so she could kiss me. Its an adjustment to make but its well worth it. Get over your feeling of being inadequate and show her much love
2006-10-27 19:42:40 · answer #8 · answered by felonyshobby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest you not to do that. Instead, get rid of your embarrassment with kissing her. She, obviously, sees something special about you. Exploit that specialty. You're the man!
2006-10-27 19:12:10 · answer #9 · answered by Mr. Main Event 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im 5' 6" and i dont see a problem. i had the same thing when my ex wore heels but it didnt bother me.
2006-10-27 19:13:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋