my fella when i first met him seemed to be perfect, good looking, sweet, caring, romantic, funny. like in a down to earth way, so i trusted him. he got me to open up and to lean on him. but he turns against me. even the things that i try to do that i think are good, he says i've done something wrong. he wanted me to need him, to be dependent on him, do everything with him and live with him. when he's mad at me, he'll take the affection away. like instead of saying 'i'll see you later baby. i love you' he'll say 'talk to you later' and when i need to talk, he says he has to go. but when he needs to talk, i am there, even 4am. he wants me to get married to him. meet his family. sometimes he is sweet and funny, and others he is such an ***.
2006-10-27 13:01:51 · 8 answers · asked by sleepyme 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It sounds like he is a control freak and wants to have you in a submissive position. Don`t let him do that to you! Stand on your own feet and don`t depend on him very much because if you don`t he will let you fall. You should not be in a relationship where your emotions and feelings revolve around him and that`s what he is trying to do to you. He wants to be able to control when you are happy or not and by with holding affection and not listening to you or appreciating your feelings, he is doing that. He makes sure that you are there for HIM, but he isn`t there for you. You should start taking steps to get out of this relationship and get on your own feet, not needing his support. Things will not get better and the more he can get away with, the more he will do. It may be hard and it may seem like he really loves you and cares at times, but he doesn`t! Get out of this!!! Don`t even think of marrying this man! He is a mental abuser and WILL NOT change.
2006-10-27 13:03:44 · answer #1 · answered by Ex-Blondie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some guys, not saying yours, do that so they can feel needed. If its going on like this now and you are letting it continue, then it will get worse. You need to make him aware of this. And the you need to put a stop on it now. If wants to talk, don't, even if it hurts. If he asks, tell him why your doing this. See if he changes. It should be easy being that hes not doing what you liked about him.
2006-10-27 20:08:42 · answer #2 · answered by Keymay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds sketchy. Withdrawing affection and telling you that you are doing things "wrong" are forms of emotional abuse. Depends on the degree. But if he's doing it in a way to control you he might have emotional issues. I hate to tell you this, but often abusive people are very charming initally, then the honeymoon phase wears off and the real person emerges. Do you feel like you need to be on your best behaviour to please him? That's a telltale sign that you're being manipulated.
2006-10-27 20:08:48 · answer #3 · answered by NordicGuru 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you really pleased with your life as it is? when we first meet someone they are on their best behavior, we don't see the bad, all is so new and we are so eager to please that we often are in denial. but after awhile the truth does come out and we see that person as he really is. what problems you have, and allow now will escalate once your married, time to bail out, before you find yourself going through an unhappy divorce.don't comprimise yourself and your beliefs for him, you will only resent him later.
2006-10-27 20:09:43 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't walk down the grocery aisle with him, let alone during a wedding ceremony!!
He needs to realize that you want him and that you don't need him!! Walk away, you will save yourself alot of heartache.
2006-10-27 20:05:28 · answer #5 · answered by ajd1bmf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need someone like that, you want to be with someone who will treat you good all the time!!
2006-10-27 20:07:55 · answer #6 · answered by Joe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GIRL HES GOING TO FLIP THE SCRIPT ON YOUR *** RUN
2006-10-27 20:05:22 · answer #7 · answered by likewiseanu i 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Then he's controlling,is that what you want?
2006-10-27 20:05:16 · answer #8 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋