I just met this guy 3 weeks ago. I am 28 going to be 29 on Sunday (WHO-HOO!!), he is 22 gonna be 23 in a month. Since I met him things are super great. He doesn't act like he is that age, he acts way older. So he broke up with his X at the beginning of July. She lives in CA, she was living with him out here in IL. Before he came back to IL after he was done with the Marines he use to live with her. Now he tells me she was abusive towards him: yelling, hitting, and throwing stuff around the house. She is coming into town to get the rest of her stuff and I am not a happy camper about it. He is trying to reassure me that everything will be ok I like you not her anymore...BLAH BLAH. I told him if I was her I would be trying to get back with you.....now I'm mad cause she is here and feel like I shouldn't be but yet I can't stop being upset. What do you think..
2006-10-27 09:53:16 · 27 answers · asked by Rican Princess 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You guys are making things a little better thanks!!!
2006-10-27 09:57:14 · update #1
i think its natural...she's his ex, who shared a lot of the same things u guys probably share right now, and who probably liked all of the same things about him that u do, so i think its perfectly natural to be a little jealous.
just try to relax. he is with u now, afterall. and y would he want to leave u to be with someone abusive? (the answer is he wouldnt) so focus on that for a while...u have to believe ur relationship has more depth than that!!
best wishes!
2006-10-27 09:56:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Just calm down and breath. Think about it, if he is stupid enough to go back to someone that treated him like crap, do you really want him in your life? You're jelous, that's normal in a relationship, just don't have panic attack and wait for him to call, if he doesn't, you desearve better. I would think about the age thing though, 7 yrs is a big gap, you may be ready for kids LONG before he is and when he is ready you will be a bit old for that. Good luck, just sit and watch something on t.v. or read a book. Don't trip or he will pick up on it and walk away. :)
2006-10-27 09:57:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think jealousy is a self-destructive fire, and you're laying the kindling with your insecurity. It sounds like an opportunity to be supportive of your guy rather than attacking him. I'm sure he isn't to fond of his ex coming to town either. You seem bothered by her but yet you are taking it out on him. That doesn't make any sense.
You are tripping. A relationship HAS to be built on trust if it's going to last. If you can't trust him, you're wasting your time. A wise man told me a healthy relationship consists of a foundation of 15% trust, then 80% friendship and finally 5% sex. Cut your man some slack, it's not his fault you're insecure about losing him.
2006-10-27 10:09:12 · answer #3 · answered by ezenbrowntown 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
WOW That's a lot of emotion in a short time. Its only been three weeks so you really cant' be sure that he is the one for you. Back off a little and let him deal with the ex. Stay in the background for a while. He will get a hold of you when she is out of there.
2006-10-27 09:58:05 · answer #4 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your way too invested in this. Its only been 3 weeks. You should chill out a little. If he's going to get back with her all your worrying isn't going to change that. She has to get her stuff right ?
2006-10-27 09:58:03 · answer #5 · answered by JustMe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she leaves town after getting her stuff what is the big deal? Take a chill pill and trust that he is being honest with you.
2006-10-27 09:55:56 · answer #6 · answered by Tiffany 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are STRAIGHT trippin!
If you have no reason to be upset at this point, why are you? That is not the way a 29 year old should behave. Be mature and calm.
2006-10-27 09:55:31 · answer #7 · answered by Chris 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
if she moved out, and he wants her to get her stuff out, she will be out of your life soon enough. mine took about 9 months to get rid of her, but if he really doesn't like the way she is and the way she acted towards him, it's nothing to worry about. let her get everything out of the house that he would look at and think of her... it'll be great
2006-10-27 09:57:06 · answer #8 · answered by innocentkitty214 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok--first of all if he goes back to her --hes the one trippin...and you should be glad that you didnt waste any more time on someone that likes to be treated like crap. second--if you act like you jealous or whatever it makes you look bad....while shes in town act as if you are just going about your business-dont be callin every 5 seconds or whatever--make him be the one wondering what YOU are doin' while hes stuck with beeeotch--he'll be much more likely to come flying back to you ASAP.
2006-10-27 09:59:29 · answer #9 · answered by calebjohnsmom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be obvious about the way you feel. You make sure this B*I*T*C*H knows how you feel about your new man and her. Your new man will like that because he now knows you already marked your territory and she cant overstep those boundaries. Let it be known girl, and your man will fall in love with you.
2006-10-27 10:00:02 · answer #10 · answered by yagurlbubblez 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋