i was in a long term relationship for 6 years. She was my first g/f and we were together for a long time. We were engaged and were getting ready for marriage when I stopped having feelings for her and ended things. That was a year and a half ago. I've since met other women and none of them have really done anything for me.
Only one other girl ever ignited any kind of emotion within me but she's made it clear her and I will never be.
Other than that, I can't ever see myself in a relationship with anyone but my ex. I can never see myself kissing anyone else. I can never see myself singing a song to any other bride at my wedding. I miss putting my hand around her waist. We never had sex, but I can't see myself having sex with anyone but her. I can't see myself having kids with anyone else. But I still don't think i'm back in love with her.
2006-10-27 07:52:09 · 18 answers · asked by tell_me_whos_sleeping_with_who 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes we never had sex....there are still people who prefer to remaining virgins till marriage
2006-10-27 07:55:59 · update #1
I can relate to you, I had a bf of 4 years and we are also willing to wait til we get married before having sex. I can say that this might be one of the biggest mistake of your life (breaking up with her).
All relationships will have a "down" side like feeling bored or suddenly seeing all the negative things about your partner but loving is a choice, making it work is a choice. You chose not to.
Obviously you still love her, so go ahead and win her back before its too late. and next time before breaking up , think about it 100 times before doing so.
2006-10-27 09:40:57 · answer #1 · answered by Keepingmycool 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you see yourself having sex with someone that you do not love? It sounds like your head and your heart are not in sync.
It sounds like you are comfortable with your ex and how she does things and what she looks like. You are also comparing all the other girls to her.
It does not sound like your ex is the one for you. Comfort is not a reason to stay with a person. Once you have true love, you will have comfort, but not the other way around.
You say that another girl ignited emotions in you, but how did those emotions compare to the feelings from your ex? Were they the same emotions? If so, that is still not love.
Examine a relationship that you have where you truly and completely love the other person or animal. Look at that love and use it as an example of how you want to feel about a girl. There will be more feelings than that, but love is a primary part of a real relationship.
Take care,
Troy
2006-10-27 08:03:15 · answer #2 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think old habits are hard to break.. Many times people stay together for reasons other than love, which really isn't fair to either person. I would take a little more time getting to know other women. Perhaps you are just not ready for that type of relationship now, which leads you to go back to something that was comfortable for you. There is no hurry to get married, in fact this is one part of your life you should be absolutely sure. A good marriage takes alot of work, but the most important ingredient is love, if you are not in love with your ex, don't marry her, you both deserve more.
2006-10-27 07:59:59 · answer #3 · answered by june clever 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear about your relationship problems - Consider this - I once got caught up on a great lady - When it all fell apart I was really cut up and spent about 3yrs fretting over it. That was before I met my fantastic wife around 16 years ago. My question to you is this - How much time are you prepared to waste hanging on to the past and what was? Only you can answer this but in the nicest possible way - Get over it - if you do not ditch these negative feelings you will give off the wrong signals to all those wonderful ladies out their who I am sure are vying for your attention.
Life is too short.....Enjoy it while you are young.
Si
2006-10-27 07:59:33 · answer #4 · answered by Simon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aha. Yours is a classic case. Something inside you changed, so you blamed her, & ended the relationship before you discovered just what it was that had changed. Before you go running back to her, or starting up a serious relationship with anyone else, you will need to go on a mission of self discovery, & figure out what it is with you that changed, & if it was something for the better, or if it's something that you want to change back.
Your longing for your ex at this time could be just a longing for things the way they were before this self alteration.
If you can, talk to her (your ex). She was there when you changed, maybe she can give you a hint as to what it was. Otherwise, start with a councellor, or therapist, or a self-help book. Otherwise you could be destined for a life of dissatisfaction.
2006-10-27 08:02:57 · answer #5 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is all caused by two things: First, you haven't been with any one else. How can you picture something that hasn't occured. Second, you aren't ready to move onto your next long term relationship yet. Estimates that I have read state that it takes half the time of the relationship to be ready to completely move on. In your case three years. It isn't always true but in my experience it seems to be.
2006-10-27 07:56:50 · answer #6 · answered by sschro9131 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are having trouble living life without her a full year and half after your break-up but don't think you are falling back in love with her? Either you are the saddest person i've ever met or your still in love with her...you should call her, at least, to get closure or see if she feels the same way
2006-10-27 07:55:50 · answer #7 · answered by violet1656 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many relationships become "boring" after a while. I guess it will never be what it used to be in the beggining. A good marriage works when two people like you said, can't imagine without being without the other person. You can't imagine life without her, maybe try to catch up with her and see where it goes?
2006-10-27 07:56:11 · answer #8 · answered by maya 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were together for 6 years, then it probably is hard for you to imagine yourself with anyone else. That's a normal feeling. But why do you feel you have to have someone? Learn to enjoy the time you have to yourself. You don't want to get back together with her if you don't love her. Just let things happen on their own. Love always happens when you least expect it!!!
2006-10-27 08:03:10 · answer #9 · answered by November 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do still love her, but u're in denial and that's what probably made u ended things up and holding u back.Move on,get on with your life and go with the flow,see what happen.If both of you were meant for each other,soon or later maybe both of you will remain together again.Who knows really...
2006-10-27 08:06:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋