Finding it hard to deal with
2006-10-27 01:55:26 · 31 answers · asked by october 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Suicide is such a hard thing to deal with because committing suicide is really selfish for the victim. They probably weren't thinking of the family they left behind....
Just remember that your father was obviously not mentally well. A mentally healthy person wouldn't choose to end their life. Don't blame yourself. He made a choice. Unfortunately, his choice has really left its mark in your life.
2006-10-27 02:00:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry. Unfortunately,when someone decides to take their life,they are obviously in such a depressed state mind that they aren't thinking of the devastation they are leaving behind them for their relatives to live with.
I don't know the reason your dad decided to leave this world and the people he loved.but he must have been very desperate.Taking your own life is the hardest thing anyone can do,it really takes so much courage.
I know you can't understand this perhaps,some think it's a cowardly thing to do,as so many people are hurt.
Your dad obviously couldn't find his way through the depression he was suffering from and decided it was his only way out.
I know it's hard,but don't stop loving him he may have thought this act was the best thing for you and your family. May he be in a happier place now,there is nothing worse than being that depressed and that feeling of total hopelessness.
You will in time learn to live with his decision and go on with your life.Make as good job of it too,he will be so proud of you.He did'nt do this because he did'nt love you believe me.
I wish you well. Please try and talk to someone about the way you feel it will help.God Bless.
2006-10-27 09:11:41 · answer #2 · answered by animalwatch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is important to know the reason why he did it. It helps a lot in understanding better. The more you understand his motives, the better you can deal with it. Suicide is almost always a very personal issue and has nothing to do with feelings towards other persons. It is something in the head which makes it that a person can no longer proceed with his or her life. I don't want to generalize of course. It is only the impression I have.
2006-10-27 09:05:43 · answer #3 · answered by Avatar13 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aww I'm sorry for your loss x You're not alone though, and there are many thing you can do to cope. First, find someone you trust to confide in perhaps a friend, relative or maybe even a shrink if you're that upset. Write a diary and try and let out your emotions through pen and paper. Keep busy to take your mind off it. Surround yourself in people you like and will cheer you up. Do something fun. Take up a new hobby. I hope you feel better really soon. x
2006-10-27 12:47:34 · answer #4 · answered by katem1992 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the loss of a close family member is devastating, however it happens. and we run the whole gamut of emotions,anger denial and whatever new categories they have these days. its quite normal. we all want answers, we want to know why, and a million other things, and theres no answers, just acceptance, and maybe some understanding of the whys and wherefores.
the bible is no use, unless youre religious, science doesnt hold any answers either... well, it does, but only if your a scientist.
obviously a self termination is something which happens to other people, we never consider its our turn in the barrel. and yet it does happen. im sure your dad had his reasons, and i will not speculate on them, suffice to say, this wasnt a spur of the moment thing... and it happened, we cant change it, all we can do is try to understand it...and get on with our lifes. im sure your dad didnt want you to to suffer like this...
my dad died and i had a breakdown..i persudaed him to have the op (heart bypass) whhich 3months later killed him.. thats guilt. 10 years down the road, im sort of back to normal..but for 3 years i stared at a wall and wrote.
it does get better as time passes... life goes on.
2006-10-27 09:13:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear that
My father also commited suicide he was 37 it was 19 years ago last friday ..
You just have to remember they obviously had a reason for doing this and that whatever the reason was it was enough to send them over the edge . Just remember it had nothing to do with you and that im sure if things could of been different and that your father could see the hurt that he caused it would never of happend
Try to talk to people about it as much as you can
Please feel free to email me if you need a chat you can contact me on my profile page
xx
2006-10-27 09:10:24 · answer #6 · answered by kirsty d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have managed to carry on with your life for 3 years after the event so you have some mental strength. Remember about the good things in your life and concentrate on the positive things in your life, friends, hobbies, favourite TV or whatever makes you smile. It isn't easy, life throws things at you and you have to deal with them, it will make you stronger. Summing up suicide is the cowards way out[I'm sorry] and it hurts the loved ones the most,so remember that and keep on keeping on. I wish you the very best of luck and hope that you will be able to cope with your tragedy.
2006-10-27 09:07:28 · answer #7 · answered by Tws 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my sweet.
There is nothing more painfull than to loose your Dad....but to have the extra burdon of him choosing to leave you is an almighty double blow.
You have a lot of grieving still to do...and a lot of what ifs....but you cannot change what has happened...you can only live on...Please ask for help from professionals....they can help you to explore your own feelings and keep your own grieving on a healthy path...
I lost my Dad twenty years ago and I am sorry but you never get over it...the sadness just drifts away very slowly ready to return at a moments memory but less painfully.
With all my thoughts for you. XX
2006-10-27 09:08:21 · answer #8 · answered by SALLY D 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is a natural feeling but the time is coming when you will find another person to fill the need for a dad. Know this that some how all of life is not wasted and you will find dad again. Your dad had his dad but it was not enough to help him find the answers to survive. Are you surviving and finding happiness?
2006-10-27 09:11:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My father died three years ago Oct 28, 2003.
I have wondered if his was a suicide to, its something I will never know for sure. I have become more of a spiritual person due to my own disappointments in life and truly believe we go back to a better place when we die. He probably feels guilty for your sake but you should forgive him because it will all make sense one day. Don't give up.
2006-10-27 09:22:34 · answer #10 · answered by Kris 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋