more jokes fro you, (2nd 1 is rudish). lol?

Question

Dave works hard at the plant and spends two nights each week bowling and
plays golf every Saturday. His wife thinks he's pushing himself too
hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin?"
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, "How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"
"I recognize her; she's the waitress from the golf club. I always have a bud at the end of the first nine, honey.
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, starts to rub herself all over him and says, "Hi Davey.
Want your usual table dance, big boy?"

Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab.
Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.
Dave tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.
She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in thebook.
The cabby turns around and says, "Geez Dave, you picked up a real ***** this time."

There's nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.

An 86-year-old man walked into a crowded Doctor's Waiting Room. As he approached the desk, the Receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?"

"There's something wrong with my dick," he replied.

The Receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded Doctor's Room and say things like that."

"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.

The Receptionist replied, "You've obviously caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and then discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private."

(continued below)

The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people things in a room full of others, if the answer could embarrass anyone."

The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes?"

"There's something wrong with my ear," he stated.
The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?"

"I can't piss out of it," the man replied.

The Waiting Room erupted in laughter.

more jokes, click on my pic, told a few before see "my questions". sithy

Answer 1

so funny, i'll remember it when i next pay a visit to my GP, thanks for making me laugh xXx

Answer 2

Nice one for a friday. Prefered the second one though, heard variations on the first before

Answer 3

Yes your right they are very good well done LMAO here and i am on my own to

Answer 4

I have heard both of these before but they still make me laught so thank you!

Answer 5

very good Sithy i bloody nearly ckoked on that last one

Answer 6

your right the first one was no good but the second one was hilarious

Answer 7

i thought the scond one was the best lol

Answer 8

lol 2nd joke,thumbs up

Answer 9

funny

Answer 10

LOL i like them lol