After receiving an e-mail from a total stranger the man that I am engaged to arranged to meet another woman for casual sex......
We had had a row and not seen each other for a week...... but does this excuse his behaviour?
Should I forgive him and give him another chance.....or should forget him??
2006-10-27 00:04:18 · 54 answers · asked by Jane E 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Somehow Jane I don't believe the whole story is shown here. Why had you not seen each other for a week? was there communication between you? Was the relationship over and if so who had ended it ? Why did he receive an email from a total stranger? How did you know about this email and his arrangement for casual sex? Did the sex happen? Could it have been a set up? He hasn't been interested in anyone before during your relationship and probably believed that the relationship was over, I am assuming of course that you had told him it was, over and over again, so the 'stranger' email sounds like a 'honeytrap'.
Not an easy answer this one but on balance I'd advise you to give him a chance, it probably wasn't quite as black and white as you've painted it.
2006-10-27 02:41:07 · answer #1 · answered by dermotsuks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would forget him, cos its cheating, i always believe in giving people 2nd chances but if you took this man back 1. his not going to learn from his mistake and 2. its always going to be in the back of ur mind when you are with this guy therefore its gonna make you stressed and maybe the trust will eat away at you tht much tht it will spoil your relationship ie, you wont be able to get along. If this guy is sorry for what he has done then m ake him wait a little while longer tht way he can see ur no soft touch and it also may give you time to deal with the way he has acted and when you do get back together you will have had time and it may not feel as bad and he def!!!will think twice about even thinking about doing something like tht.
good luck
2006-10-27 00:13:12 · answer #2 · answered by ice_castles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u can withstand heartaches then give the relationship a second thought, if not then kick him off. It is always good to marry someone u will trust even around ur sisters and friend or even ur daughter, that way u won't need to worry about his everymove. But this action of his put all that in doubt.
I will advise u think well b4 making a decision considering the fact that he's your fiance. There must be something good in him as well. Remember, men will alway be men.
2006-10-27 00:30:43 · answer #3 · answered by hottest 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you know already what you think of him ('the man that CLAIMS to love me'). You're clearly not ok with it, although I'm not sure from your posting whether you had agreed with him that he could go off with this woman?
At any rate, the fact he's buggered off for a week whilst knowing you were upset illustrates the kind of guy he is. If he's not willing to take your feelings into account, then what's the point of you two having a relationship? If you both want your relationship to be relaxed, then maybe it would be ok for him to sleep around. But that doesn't sound like what you want!
2006-10-27 00:20:41 · answer #4 · answered by Nikita21 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can live with the knowledge that every time you two fight he will just email some random stranger and arrange to have sex then marry the man and have a great life.
But if you have any sense at all you would be kicking him to the curb with the pointiest stilettos that you own.
2006-10-27 00:11:10 · answer #5 · answered by wickedly_funny66 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start as you mean to go on , if your happy to cook , clean and tidy after him while he goes out having casual sex then crack on ,
just make sure he wears a condom when he's in bed with you coz you don't want syphilis , herpes or aids and try to keep a spare bed available for when his bastard kids turn up out of the blue .
Have some respect for yourself and get rid , alternatively as you don't seem to be that bothered maybe you should suggest you both become swingers and so both enjoy casual sex while having the security of a relationship as well ?
2006-10-27 00:16:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
forget him, his action has prove that he does not love you. but is it for real ? or he just setting this all up to upset you? find out and if he did truly arranged meeting a woman for casual sex its not worth being with him because at the end of the day he will do it again and you might end up catching the std he catch in casual sex.
2006-10-27 00:14:11 · answer #7 · answered by whitetiger 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can find it in your heart to do so, forgive him, but NO! It does not excuse his behavior. He does not appear to be a good candidate for a second chance either.
ALL healthy relationships are built on fidelity, loyalty, trust, and mutual respect. As such, continuing a relationship that is below this standard is settling for less when more is required. Send him on his way.
2006-10-27 00:10:22 · answer #8 · answered by Mr. US of A, Baby! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At present you are only engaged to the guy, so get out now.
How many times will he go out for casual sex in his life, will you put up with that, I would call you silly if you allowed him.
Would he allow you to go and do what yopu want also.
Your guy is not worth the love, trust or anything at all. DROP HIM.
2006-10-27 00:10:36 · answer #9 · answered by ashok kumar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who is this stranger and why would they send YOU an e-mail??
If it is true he will do it again! Does he go out of town a lot for work, will you be able to trust everytime he leaves for a business trip?
This is a hard and very painful one if it is true.
I was somewhat engaged and was in denial of my boyfriend cheating on me constantly. I look back still to this day and say "yes he must of ****ed that one too".
Good luck!
2006-10-27 00:12:02 · answer #10 · answered by Angelcupcake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋