We had a falling thru after my junior year of high school...i was causing trouble and didn't want to face the consequences; so, i moved two states away and lived with my dad. (parents divorced) I graduated high school there and met a guy (cody). Mom and I started talking again, cody and i took a trip back to mom's and visited. mom offered to pay for college if i moved back to town. cody & i got engaged. i moved back to mom's. cody moved a couple months later, i moved out of mom's again and into apartment w/ cody. cody's dad was very sick, we wanted to be w/ his parents during thanksgiving. mom thru a fit and quit talking to me again. moved back to IN w/ cody. mom started talking again. cody & i bought a house. cody & i got married. mom refused to come to wedding, so had it without her: her parents and brother came. mom stopped talking. mom started talking. cody's dad died. wanted to spend thanksgiving w/ mom but stay half the week w/ gma. mom thru a fit, quit talking.
2006-10-26 19:52:27 · 9 answers · asked by vickygrrl05 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Need to have a talk with mum and tell her that this talking and not talking is no longer going to work she either accepts decisions that u as an adult makes or she needs to stay away for good explain to her how hurt you are and how much of each others lives u r both missing out on. Good Luck
2006-10-26 20:00:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you have a life and you want you mom to be apart of it. You have to remember that you are married and your husbands wants and needs come first. It sounds like you love your mother very much, but you can't let her control you or your actions. Try to preplan events with her like spending mother's day or things like that. Pick and choose what you tell your mom about what's going on in your life because if you don't, she will be mad at you off and on for the rest of your life. Somebody has to be the adult here and since your mom wants to play the roll of immature child, you be the adult you take the high road. When you mom is mad at you, you still call her, leave her messages saying you love her, invite her out to lunch,dinner,breakfast or shopping. You be you and live your life and make decisions on how you and your husband see fit, not what your mother my see fit. FREE YOUR MIND AND THE REST WILL FOLLOW don't worry every thing will work out, keep the lines of communication open with your mom but don't let it interfere with your marriage.
2006-10-26 20:15:32 · answer #2 · answered by sayj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mom doesn't know where she fits in your life. Make a defined space for her, like a fifteen minute phone call from 10:30 to 10:45 Monday morning. Have an agenda (safe things you can talk about) and an exit plan ("Got to go, Mom. I'll call you next week. -- or tomorrow, or Wednesday...) During that period, don't expect anything, just try to survive. Make a mental note of anything she does. (You don't have to respond to it. Just notice.) I don't think you'll ever be able to trust her or depend on her. But you can enjoy loving each other. You'll see.
2006-10-26 20:08:53 · answer #3 · answered by shirleykins 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry sweetie, but I think your Mom is just fed up with you and your antics! I think you have peed her off just too many times that it will take a long time for her to forget and forgive.
Maybe give her that time. Start by sending her nice cards with a short sincere message inside once ever few weeks. Don't push just have some patience and let her absorb and appreciate that you are trying your best to make amends and be her "girl" again.
If I'm reading you "all wrong" then I apologies.
Cheers
Carole
2006-10-26 20:01:34 · answer #4 · answered by rentongal1958 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call your mom & tell her that you want all this bickering between the two of you to stop. Tell her that you love her and want to make things right with her again. If you have to make some concessions to please her, then try to do so. She sounds like she is childish. You sound more like the more mature one, so try to humor her to get her to accept you again. You only have one mom and you will be happy that you did everything in your power to keep her in your life after she leaves this world. So for now, just cherish her as your mother and you will both be happier people. God bless you.
2006-10-26 20:15:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like if you do e/thing she wishes, it may work out between you. But apparantly it appears that she prefers things to be her way, or she stops speaking with you.
Perhaps if you make it clear that you are an adult, and you'd like to have an adult relationship with her. If that's not possible, than
you live your life for and with the family that you and cody have already, and continue to create.
2006-10-26 20:00:53 · answer #6 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can also put yourself in your moms shoes, every thanksgiving she becomes the afterthought. How important she must feel in your life. You two need to sit down and talk (without Cody). your hurting and so is she. I wish you two the best
2006-10-26 20:26:15 · answer #7 · answered by bizzyboneissexy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your mother to grow up and stop being so jealous... If your mother cannot accept you as the adult that you have become than its only her loss... Good luck with your life, its your mums decision to not be apart of it not yours.
2006-10-26 20:07:28 · answer #8 · answered by mumzie04 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask your dad to write to your mom.
it's time they made contact.
I really think your mom needs someone to talk to, just to get stuff out of her system. I hope your dad is relaxed and friendly to her.
2006-10-26 19:56:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋