when we first met i asked him what type of relationship we were going to have. he suggested that we become friends and see what happens. i feel that the relatioship is not going anywhere and only is a means to get his needs met. do i stick it out and see what happens or do i leave him alone altogether?
2006-10-26 17:16:53 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Its a fact that physical intimacy is a key focal point for men, while women prefer emotional intimacy.
However, in your case it appears that this man is manipulating your emotions to get your body.
Healthy relationships are based on setting (and living upto) the right expectations from both sides. He seems to have conveniently set this expectation with you that 'physical intimacy' might be a part of the relationship game. And you played along....further endorsing this expectations.
You are paying the price for playing along with this expectation. Chances are, he might just be using you for physical gratification with little emotional investment.
IF YOU STILL LIKE HIM, the best way to counter this situation is to 'renegotiate' the expectations. Tell him you are not interested in sex and would like to wait for some more time till you are comfortable. If his attraction is exclusively physical....he'll drfit away automatically (as he never had emotional investments anyways). If he genuinely loves you beyond your flesh, he'll mend ways and respect your desires.
Give him few weeks and watch things unfold. Take care and don't get emotionally blackmailed into doing something you don't enjoy
2006-10-27 02:03:07 · answer #1 · answered by cucumber_cool 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel this way and you have been seeing him for 9 months you need to be open with him and ask him what he wants out of the relationship. If he tellls you something you don't want to hear then maybe it is time to say goodbye. On the other hand if it is what you want to hear stick it out with him and see how it goes. Either way he needs to be open and honest with you. If he won't be or you think he isn't being open and honest with you then you need to dump him. You will know at that point that he doesn't really care about you or love you he is just being selfish. As we well know a relationship is about compromise not selfishness.
2006-10-26 17:26:44 · answer #2 · answered by lita ozzy bear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say leave him alone altogether...a friendship does not mean be intimate, of course the relationship is going nowhere because you are giving him all he want without a commitment. leave him alone and you'll see if he's really a friend by his reaction, its 1 thing to be "friends with benefits" but you want something more,allowing him to sex you isnt the way for you to get what you want ...let him, his sex, and his friendship go
2006-10-26 17:24:26 · answer #3 · answered by huneygrl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he just want to become friends with you,then it's better you stop intimate each others.Why should u satisfy his needs when your relationship is going no where???
I apologise for the following statement,it might hurt you but still i have to say it to you :
Is he treating you as a prostitute???But you are worst than them cos at least they get paid for thier services and you don't.He's using you to meet his needs.
So it's better you leave him now..
2006-10-26 17:25:25 · answer #4 · answered by eZY jOHn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him again where the relationship is going if he still answers the same way then u got ur answer u r just a piece of meat whenever he needs u.
2006-10-26 17:22:33 · answer #5 · answered by papabeartex 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you asked him recently where the relationship stands? Guys tend not to change things if it's working in their favor. Bring it up and see what he has to say. If he tells you to keep things the way they are, then get rid of him.
2006-10-26 17:22:31 · answer #6 · answered by jadelily78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I may suggest something to you, once you are friends, you might feel like you don't want to lose your friendship over a sex or a relationship. He might feel that he wants more than just being friends.
2006-10-26 17:20:58 · answer #7 · answered by Jazz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he doesnt make the commentment then he is just in it for the booty and probably has others just like u. i would leave him and tell him y but if he decides to make a commentment after u tell him this then u really need to lose him!!! sry
2006-10-26 17:23:51 · answer #8 · answered by kjokinen06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what do you think? Should you or should you not. Sometimes that decision is up to use and you have to choice what to do. Unless you want that to continue then continue but well good luck.
2006-10-26 17:22:22 · answer #9 · answered by Luke 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've played the fool long enough,now move along.
2006-10-26 17:22:18 · answer #10 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋