English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

I'm not a parent, but I do know how afraid of my parents I used to be. As an adult I actually am still quite afraid of them, its better to just stay away.

2006-10-26 16:46:23 · 31 answers · asked by pumpmar 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting Parenting

31 answers

smacking or slapping never had never have and never will teach a kid lesson..when you hit a kid,it shows him that his parent have lack of self control on them..and what it also shows that being a mature is all about spanking your lil ones instead of loving them...thats why you are scared of your parents because they used to hit you and FEAR is not parenting parenting is love and respect..now if your parents wouldnt have spanked you,you wont stay away from them instead of it you would love them and spend time with them...thats why its not ok to teach a kid by giving him pain of spanking or slapping..

2006-10-26 21:18:22 · answer #1 · answered by cool k 2 · 1 1

I believe there are times when discipline should involve a spanking. I don't believe slapping is necessary. At times parents need to get a child's attention and punish them at the same time. A spanking does this. But some children will learn to hit or be aggressive if that is the only means of punishment they get. Parents should learn how to discipline in various ways without striking a child. And it also clearly depends how strong the spanking is. Too strong and you hurt the child physically, and emotionally. Not strong enough, and probably it would make nearly no impact.

2006-10-26 16:57:26 · answer #2 · answered by wellab76 2 · 0 1

I know that this is a many sided issue, and I do believe that spanking can be carried to far. However, as a parent, I can tell you that children will push the limits of what they should and should not be doing. How are they to know the differance between right and absolutley wrong if you do not teach them? I want to be crystal clear when I say that no parent should hit their children anywhere other than the rear and and with nothing but their hand over the pants. I used to be hit as a child, and I know the differance between right spankings and wrong spankings. I can say this though, I rarely have to spank them because they know to listen to me when I ask them not to do something. I have very well behaved children that are a pleasure to be around, because they are respectful and polite, and I think that it is because they know to listen to me. Does that mean that I spank all of the time? Absolutley not. I cannot remember the last time that I have had to spank my kids. They usually get sat in the corner. However, when they are doing something that is very very naughty, like something malicious,or something that can kill them, i.e. running into the street when I am telling them not to, they get spanked, because that is a lesson that they need to know.

2006-10-26 16:54:32 · answer #3 · answered by The Nag 5 · 0 1

I was a very rebellious/belligerent child. Everyone spanked me... my grandfather said that he spanked me more than all his children and grandchildren put together. I believe if they had not spanked me, I would have ended up in prison or worse. As it is, I have had zero infractions of the law in my life (not even a speeding ticket). But, they also gave me lots and lots of positive reinforcement (that is just as important). I love them with all my heart and I'm so glad they wailed on my bottom... I really needed it.
Those people who give those rubbishy arguments against spanking don't have a clue. I have a super high self-esteem and spanking didn't teach me to hit... I got spanked for hitting people. Look at how the children are ending up these days. Just how many school shootings, violence, rebellion, etc. have we had from children who were not spanked? As people quit spanking more and more, these things will continually go up more and more. Just look at the statistics from back in the days when people spanked. Spare the rod...

2006-10-28 08:52:58 · answer #4 · answered by Questioner 7 · 0 0

I'm not a parent, but I am heavily involved in my niece's and nephew's lives and personally I think that spanking isn't effective because I believe that violence or using physical force shouldn't be used (especially on a small child). No child should have to be afraid of their parents. I think that if the child has done something wrong you need to talk to them so they learn why it was wrong and so they know and won't do it again because they know its wrong, not because they will be hit. In my opinion a child is so much smaller and when a parent forces them to be spanked it is teaching them that the bigger person can use physical force and win.

2006-10-26 16:58:55 · answer #5 · answered by Karen G 1 · 1 0

i in my opinion don't love spanking, yet I also imagine that if grounding or taking a toy/interesting holiday/and so on away doesn't artwork to modify the habit, if achieved correct, spanking can prepare the lesson you want your youngster to study. yet it really is something i'd want to percentage with you because i imagine you're being a touch one sided about this difficulty : my husband became spanked as a baby. My 3 siblings and that i have been not. My husband has an extremely good activity, seems after himself and my son and that i and is the most to blame guy i have ever met. I have 2 youthful brothers. One became in contact contained in the molestation of our sister. he's narcissistic, a bully and likely quite of a sociopath. He has been decrease out of my existence and could not in any respect meet my son. My different brother has been in problem with the regulation, even passing a even as in Juvenile corridor for armed robbery. So if spanking is unfavourable to a baby and is not ok, how come my husband is the more effective perfect guy out of the three i have defined? there is an endless distinction between a good achieved spanking and "hitting". Spanking isn't meant to really scare a baby and in case you've been scared as a baby, possibly you're describing certainly abuse, not spankings.

2016-12-05 06:48:57 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

It will teach them what it feels like to be slapped or spanked.

I was beat often and severely as a child, usually for no reason other than my mother felt like it. Spanking or slapping a child isn't the first course of action I would take in disciplining them, but there are circumstances where I wouldn't rule it out. As I stated above, it shows them what it feels like, and if they are physically hurting someone, then sometimes the only way to have them empathize with what they are doing to that person is to put them through some physical distress as well.

When my nephew was four one of his preschool classmates had gotten a gold crown and he wanted one. His mother and I tried to tell him that you only get things like that done if there is something wrong with your teeth. He kept insisting on wanting one, even when we told him it would be painful. I spoke with his mother and we told him that we wanted to give him an idea of how painful it would be, so if he could take me pinching his arm for ten seconds that would give him some idea and he could get the crowns then. He agreed and I started to pinch his arm, not very hard but in a spot I knew would be sensitive. He lasted about a second and I apologized for hurting him, and he understood that I didn't do it to be mean. This gave him an idea, though, of the very real pain he would have had to face and he never spoke of wanted gold crowns again.

2006-10-26 17:06:29 · answer #7 · answered by marklemoore 6 · 0 0

I think the only lesson it teaches children is that physical violence is a good method to use to resolve situations, and that it's okay for someone who's bigger to intimidate someone who's smaller. And I've noticed that generally speaking, parents who use spank or slap their children have kids that are far less well-behaved than my own. I don't know how many times I've heard a parent say "He/she just won't LISTEN" after spanking their child. I think there's always a better solution, but you have to take the time & initiative to find it. But that's just my personal opinion.

2006-10-26 16:49:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

No I do not believe spaking or slapping a child teaches them anything useful... It does teach them that physical violence is an acceptable means of getting someone to conform... It teaches them that someone bigger than them can control them through the use of physical violence.. It teaches a child that because someone is bigger and stronger than they are that person can get them to comform through pain...

No I do not believe is spanking, slapping, swatting, smacking, or in any other way using physical violence as a form of behavior modification... If I am not smart enough, creative enough and in control of myself enough to reason with a child and teach them right from wrong without physical violence and fear I have no right being a parent in the first place...

I have 3 children ages 19, 17, and 9 who have never been spanked (other than teasing birthday spankings by thier grandfather all done with comedy and laughter the kids never afraid and never spanked more than a tap just like setting your hand on something) They are well behaved children who know right from wrong and who are delightful.... It doesnt take fear and physical violence to raise children if the parent is willing to put in the time and effort to teach with communication rather than pain...

2006-10-26 19:23:22 · answer #9 · answered by Diane (PFLAG) 7 · 2 1

I'm not a parents but: It depends, that would be a case by case decision. By nature, humans have violent instincts, you even see babies taking swings at people. But everyone reacts to it differently. I was a mild child, and rarely spanked, and I am not a violent person, and have never been in a physical fight. But I have known and seen some children that a good spanking could be effective for. Some people take it too far, and the result becomes negative.

2006-10-26 16:50:21 · answer #10 · answered by DumBlonD 4 · 0 1

I was hit as a child myself and understand your fear of your parents. As a single mother of a 10 year old and a 7 year old, I know exactly hoe frusterating things can get, but that is when I take my "time out" calm down and talk to them about what the problem is. It works great, they understand they have done something wrong, they see how we talked it out, and they saw me take the time to calm myself down. They are learning a great lesson, far better a lesson then if I were to just smak or spank them. Good luck

2006-10-26 17:02:26 · answer #11 · answered by pinkhopper2003 2 · 1 0

fedest.com, questions and answers