If attending a funeral with a friend, but you don't really know the deceased, should you put money in a card anyway? Or is a card sufficient?
2006-10-26 16:23:19 · 13 answers · asked by Lake Lover 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I don't think that money in a card is appropriate for a funeral. A card is plenty, but if you want to do something nice, bring a dessert for the wake or if they are having a gathering after the funeral.
2006-10-26 16:26:09 · answer #1 · answered by The Nag 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cards or flowers would suffice
Money is usually given to the deceased's family, applicable for Chinese only. The tradition started as a way to help the family cover the costs of the funeral, which can be really expensive
2006-10-26 16:48:15 · answer #2 · answered by warasouth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Money is not expected at a funeral. Sometimes there is a request to donate to a charity in lieu of flowers, or there may be a fund set up at a local bank, if the deceased left behind young children. These things are optional as well.
2006-10-27 04:01:29 · answer #3 · answered by Tiss 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never heard of giving money at a funeral. I'd bring flowers with a card attached. When my grandmother passed, we asked everyone "Please, no flowers. Instead, we would appreciate donations to the scholarship fund in her name."
Flowers can be very pricey, so let's say everyone who was going to spend $20 to $50+ dollars (for a small arrangement - figure way more for a large arrangement) put the money toward a fund instead. That would be a lasting way to remember the deceased.
Anyway, to answer your question, I'd get a small basket of flowers with a sympathy card.
p.s. - it's okay that you didn't know the deceased. You're there to support the family and friends in their time of loss.
2006-10-26 16:27:01 · answer #4 · answered by locolady98 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've never heard of money for a funeral. Flowers seem a waste. I usually give a donation to a charity in the deceased person's name.
2006-10-28 20:54:56 · answer #5 · answered by ebonyruffles 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A card with condolences is sufficient. If you would like to handwrite a special thought that would be nice, but also not necessary. But here are a couple I have used you might want to consider; " God never closes one door without opening another." or "The sunset need not be less beautiful than the dawn".
2006-10-26 16:27:49 · answer #6 · answered by Caper 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A card is sufficient. I've never given money. When I've given a gift it has always been flowers.
2006-10-26 16:33:01 · answer #7 · answered by CurledWolf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've never had money given to me for my dad or my grandmothers funeral. Just a card, and your support will be enough.
2006-10-26 16:26:17 · answer #8 · answered by BAnne 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, money can be weird. Bring flowers if you feel like it. Your attendance should be enough though.... you can sign the guest book and leave your message there too.
My mom is Chinese and when my dad passed away (who was white) she actually made little envelopes with lucky candy and a brand new dollar for everybody who attended the services as a gesture to wish them good luck, so the bad fortune we experienced would not go to them.
2006-10-26 17:26:03 · answer #9 · answered by M 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
A card is sufficient.
2006-10-26 16:29:06 · answer #10 · answered by missingora 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋