Iv been seein him for about 6 months and he`s absolutely wonderful and he adores me dearly and the feeling is completely mutual.But when my ex found out he went crazy, but thing is he dumped me coz he wanted to be with someone else, and i learnt to accept that (after crying my heart out for ages)and moved on, and now im happy.And to make it worse, i havnt told my best friend coz i dont know what her reaction will be.Should i feel guilty for being with this new guy coz of what people will think or should i not care, and do i tell my best friend???
2006-10-26 12:05:35 · 25 answers · asked by missbird 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If that loser dumped you to be with another chic it is HIS LOSS!
He didn't care about your feelings, so why care about his. Let his best friend-your new man deal with your ex. If they are truly best friends then your ex will get over it. If your ex continues to act crazy, hopefully your new boyfriend likes you enough to stick it out and put your ex in his place. Your ex already made your heart once, don't give him the power to do it again. And if your best friend is really a "best friend" she'll support you no matter what. Don't worry about other people honey, they are not the ones making you smile, holding your hand, and making you feel like a princess. You do what makes you happy right now because no one is gonna look out for you like yourself!
2006-10-26 12:11:12 · answer #1 · answered by alugo_19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not feel guilty at all. You and your ex has already finished, and he has not right to get upset with you. People around you may get surprised, but it doesn't mean you are doing a wrong thing. After all all that matters is that you guys are happy together, and if so then everyone will be on your side at the end.
Don't be afraid to tell your best friend about it. She might give you some opinions, but if she does that is because she's worried about you, not because she want you to feel bad. Remember, friends are supposed to be there to help. So once she knows that you are fine, then she will help you. But you can wait if you don't feel comfortable telling her yet.
I have been into the same kind of situation. It was a really bumpy ride in the beginning, because we were afraid to tell anyone about us. But it settled down when we did. And we are still together 3 years after that.
Good luck.
2006-10-26 15:23:34 · answer #2 · answered by ono 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By him breaking up with you, he has allowed you to be with whoever you choose IMHO. If you were with your ex and fancied his friend, then it would be a fancy you/moral issue and you would have to break up wih your current partner (now your ex) first. It then comes down to guilt and whether loyalty is with friend or need to be with you.
Just make sure you are not doing this to get at your ex. If you are not, what's the problem? You have done nothing wrong, if anything it is your new guy's dilema. But even so, your ex has even given your new partner permission by dumping you (he has said he doesn't want you).
He has no grounds to be angry (except with himself) for it is his own fault and seems like now regrets it, but you cannot allow yourself to be at his beck and call as he decides. So tough.
I think your friend should see this the same way as me.
2006-10-26 12:27:45 · answer #3 · answered by The Mole 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
speaking from experience id say thhrow caution to the wind (but make sure you aint spitting into the wind first lol) and go for it becuz i started dating my best m8s ex about 6months after they split i jut went for it wether i was in the wrong....i dont think so because although i lost a friend in the following months i also gained one not only that we have been going strong for just over 5years n now its our daughters 1st xmass this year. imple answer YES you neva know wots round the corner n never will unless you take a look good luck
2006-10-26 15:53:01 · answer #4 · answered by maverick66555 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Normally I would say NO, this is wrong. But since your ex screwed you over, then go for it. This guy treats you way better obviously, and your ex dumped you for some other chick.. so who cares. Do what makes you happy.
I'm confused about why it matters if your best friend knows...
2006-10-26 12:08:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
A good childhood friend of mine always talked about how mad she would get if some of her friends dated one of her ex's. Now she has been married for 15 years to her ex's best friend. They are all good friends today but it took the old boyfriend/friend a while to get over it.
If they are really serious about each other and in love, I say go for it. If they are just fooling around it's not worth losing your best friend over.
2006-10-26 12:14:19 · answer #6 · answered by IC 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm on the same boat, my ex actually introduced my boyfriend to me, but he never intended for us to start dating- but we are!!! And very happily. My boy still hasn't told my ex, but then again it's only been about 2 and a half months... I don't see anything wrong with it. You and your ex are not together for a reason, and why shouldn't you be happy together? Your ex needs to accept the fact that it is reality and get the f*ck over himself! It's your business, not his! Go on girl, be happy!
2006-10-26 12:12:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing wrong with what you are doing, it harms nobody and helps two people be happy.
The only down side is that you current and ex may now have a new topic of conversation.
2006-10-26 12:11:36 · answer #8 · answered by Clive 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it might be different if you'd dumped the guy to go out with his best friend, but as it is he blew his chance and has no right to complain. tell him to shove off as politely and nicely and in as friendly way as possible ^-^ and definitely tell your best friend, because if she's really your best friend she will definitely understand. your ex sounds like a possessive jerk, but i don't know him. good luck ^-^
2006-10-26 12:09:03 · answer #9 · answered by fireflower413 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go with your instincts. I am actually engaged to my ex's best friend. Of course, I dated my ex over 10 years ago...so it wasn't a huge deal. But apparently my ex had words with my fiancee that I was still his. hmmm. whatever. do what makes you happy.
2006-10-26 12:08:41 · answer #10 · answered by any p 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋