Assume your daughter is impregnated would you accept it,seek redress action against the boy,or be happy.
2006-10-26 10:57:07 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
It depends how she feels about it. the only thing you can do is support her or you will lose her.
2006-10-26 11:05:03 · answer #1 · answered by R C 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well.....my niece has done just that. We are a family of values...and she made a mistake. We didn't let her get an abortion, She did it...she has to except the responsibility. It's not the babies fault.
She is still in school, and working, part time for the things she needs for her baby. We are teaching her the hard way. We do help in the way of taking care of the baby when she has to go to school. That we couldn't tamper with. Then on her days off from school and work...she has her daughter. Every once a a while she gets a break, Someone will baby sit so that she may go out to the movies or something. As far as the father goes...well thats between my sister and him...I guess he was older...but my niece never told him how old she was...he never asked...but he's 19 she was 17 then...But He takes care of what needs to be done. So in no way...was it easy for her...and we are letting her do everything she needs to do....to be a good mother and get her education.
2006-10-26 18:07:28 · answer #2 · answered by Chocolate_Bunny 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You want my honest opinion.... You have her adopt that child out. We have been told in our church firmly that if a under age girl is pg and not going to marry the father and take responsibility then they are to adopt that baby out.
Children deserve to have both a father and a mohter in a marriage. If not, there is no question.......there are MANY infertile families out there, including myself who am 41 and have no kids. I can't afford a 30k adoption at this point and I am too old to wait around for infertility treatments to work.
If the boy is over 18 by all means prosecute. It is against the law. Further, encourage her to adopt out the child. It is not for the grandparents to be burdened down by this child coming- and for selfish reasons many grandparents do end up encouraging their children to keep the babies. It is not your place to take that child. You are being robbed of your retirement and often this encourages yet again, the same mistake with the child to go ahead and get pg again.
She made a mistake that can be made better if she did the right thing for the child, your family and herself.
It sickens me that parents do not take responsibity for this instead let their babies keep their babies....
Do the right thing Mom.
2006-10-26 19:50:19 · answer #3 · answered by SunValleyLife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends. I would make her deal with it and make her pay for everything (food, clothes, diapers, etc.) up to a certain point. If my daughter was unable to pay for it physically, I would step in and pay for a portion of it. However, if my daughter were more than capable to get a job and buy everything, I'd let her pay for it. I wouldn't spoil her by doing what most parents do nowadays. I would tell my daughter's boyfriend that he has to help my daughter, or else he would be no longer welcome in my house or around my daughter. My daughter would learn from the experience (hopefully), and would gain responsibility earlier than everyone else.
Most parents nowadays would say that they'd feel sorry for the daughter and would pay for all of the expenses, but I say, "Why should parents pay for something the kids did?" As a teenager, I strongly disagree with this perspective.
2006-10-26 18:23:02 · answer #4 · answered by randkcarpenterfan 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What action could you seek against the boy? You pretty much have to accept it, unless you want your daughter to have an abortion. Different people feel different ways about abortion, but really you should probably just accept it, be happy, but tell your daughter that she is going to have to support her baby, and don't do everything for her.
2006-10-26 18:00:29 · answer #5 · answered by crazydavythe1st 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I got pregnant with my daughter at 17, and I'm sure my mom felt the same way you do, but she was wonderful. She was there for me and listened to me. We became very close. She told me that she wasn't mad, just disappointed. Anyway, I married her father when I was 18. We've been together for almost 10 years now and our children have a wonderful life.
2006-10-26 18:47:40 · answer #6 · answered by sympatheticmom 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you don't "solve the problem" you wait 9 months and love your grandchild. I also think to many parents take action against young men, accusing them of statatory rape when the girl was just as much a participant. yes, he should have to take responsibility but not punished by law that is of course unless the father is like 30 or 40 years old- then i would have to say he is a sicko and deserves jailtime.
2006-10-26 18:03:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
My parents excepted it when it happened to me. You may be disappointed but the girl who is pregnant is really scarred. I am glad that my parents delt with it...the last thing you want to do is push away your daughter and your grandchild. It is hard, to be in either shoes. Now that I am a mom I know that I will be disappointed in my kids at times but nothing they can ever do will make me not be there for them. Good luck to the both of you.
2006-10-26 18:18:08 · answer #8 · answered by ♥just me♥ 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would accept it in that situation. After coming to terms with it I would talk to my daughter about the options she has such as keeping the baby and raising it, adoption, and abortion. Let her make the decision after she understands all the responsibility and joys that come w/ parenthood b/c in the long run she is the one who has to live w/ the decision. You as the parent should also provide support and make sure she seeks good prenatal care. About the boy I would discuss the pregnancy w/ him and his parents if he is underage to make sure that he upholds his responsiblity in making the child just as much as your daughter.
2006-10-26 18:08:34 · answer #9 · answered by pinkjet 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
IN FRONT OF HER,,,,Love the life of your grandchild.
Let her know you do not like her choice of becoming pregnant and doing something so irresponsible
Tell the "BOY" to grow the hell up and you demand that he financially support the child....Do not expect him to be the father to the child or a man.... but the first time he does your daughter WRONG again.........YOU be the man and teach that walking hormone a lesson about being responsible with your "fatherly physical advise"
2006-10-26 18:31:20 · answer #10 · answered by e_guanajuato 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
WELL YOU NEED TO TRY NOT TO ADDRESS IT AS A "PROBLEM" ITS HARD I KNOW BUT ONE DAY THAT WILL BE YOUR GRANDBABY! AND LABELING IT WITH NEGATIVE NAMES DOESN'T HELP ANYONE. YOUR DAUGHTER MADE A CHOICE AS WELL SHE HOPEFULLY KNOWS THE BOY A LITTLE BETTER THAN YOU WHAT KIND OF PARENTS DOES HE HAVE WILL THEY HELP OR EVEN CARE IF YOU THINK SO TALK TO THEM EVEN IF NOT MAYBE YOU SHOULD GIVE THEM A CHANCE SO YOU DON'T FEEL ALONE. BUT LET YOUR DAUGHTER KNOW THAT GOD AND YOU STILL LOVE HER AND SHE IS NOW GOING TO HAVE TO MAKE SOME LIFE CHANGES B/C SHE IS GOING TO BE THE MOM AND BE HAPPY ANY BABY IS A PRECIOUS GIFT JUST REMEMBER THAT ON THE HARD DAYS
2006-10-26 18:05:03 · answer #11 · answered by snaggles 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋