Situation: My parents want me to date people that are only of my same race. I currently have a different-race girlfriend that they do not know about. She and I are extremely happy and want to stay together. Of course, I could've handled things myself by confronting my parents, however they support me (a lot) financially and things such as that.
I could keep it secret forever, however Her parents wants my parents to know that I am dating their daughter.
What is it I should do? Tell my parents and get disowned and become a bum, or keep it secret forever?
2006-10-26 09:24:30 · 14 answers · asked by pertinential 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You can't hide it forever, so get that out of your head. If you care about this girl you will eventually have to tell them, I would suggest making sure this is who you want to be with, if your parents are still supporting you I would be careful and I would think you are still young, this will probably not be the person you end spending the rest of your life with. So just weigh your options. Now her parents wanting your parents to know, that is a racial thing, they want to see how your parents will react to that.
I would just be careful, you don't want to hurt your girlfriend or your parents, but in today's time people are getting more open about something other than The Clevers.
2006-10-26 09:31:31 · answer #1 · answered by kirsten215 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
- hey I am also in an interracial relationship so I kind of know where you are coming from. On the other hand - what the heck- yes tell your parents and maybe by doing that you'll prove to them that you need to be respected as a person- those kind of decisions gain respect. The fact that you are so dependent on them obviously reduces their respect for you as a person and makes them think that they can control you even in your personal life- what it comes down to is not bum status or hypocrite status- it comes down to acting like a free and mature individual- and there often is a price to pay for freedom- you have to work for it- or you can just remain hiding and ashamed of things you dont have to be ashamed of - the right thing to do would be to tell them....good luck - I know how hard it is but you will feel way better if you do
2006-10-26 09:32:51 · answer #2 · answered by carinamusae 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How do you know that they will disown you? You can't keep it a secret forever, then it's not a real relationship. You have to figure out if this girl is worth fighting your parents for, and if so fight them.
2006-10-26 09:27:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tough situations like this often require tough decisions. Do you love her enough to show her you are proud to be with her? Enough to show her that you are serious and committed to her? Enough to show her that you believe the two of you can be strong enough together to work through hte hard times?
If those are yesses then it answers your question. I'm not saying it will be easy or pleasant at home as you deal with this. IF the two of you really love each other and are really serious though, then you have someone that will be with you every step of the way.
2006-10-26 09:30:02 · answer #4 · answered by toff 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you try bringing her around as a friend first and letting them meet her and see how sweet she is. Then if they seem to like her, ease them into your thoughts of dating her and being in a relationship with her. You can only do so much. It's a tough situation, but you are your own person.
2006-10-26 09:29:17 · answer #5 · answered by Dr. Kat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whether she knows it now or not, your girlfriend will eventually resent you for not standing up to your parents on her behalf. You can keep the whole thing a secret if you want, but I don't expect your relationship will last very long.
2006-10-26 09:27:19 · answer #6 · answered by Ms. Roberts 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be a man and tell them, your parents need to get over this racial thing and you need to please yourself for a change and not your parents. I think that if you like this girl great, besides I doubt your parents are really gonna put you out on the street. You sound like a spoiled rich boy, who is afraid you might have to work like the rest of us.
2006-10-26 09:31:21 · answer #7 · answered by wesgirl 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Duh, Tell your parents and let them know they can either accept your relationship (an extension of you) or step aside. If they have an issue with that and you depend on them for anything maybe you need to reevaluate yourself (become independent and then), let them know this is what you are happy about. Don't allow others to steal your happiness. If they don't like it then tough!
2006-10-26 09:29:51 · answer #8 · answered by souljagirpart2 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know your parents better then us...If you feel strongly about this lady and you feel she could possibly be the one then I would sit down and explain to your parents how you feel...The worst thing they can do is tell you they disapprove of it...or they could flip the script and tell you how they love you and honor your decision...whatever they do atleast your not disrespecting them and telling them how you really feel...Good Luck!
2006-10-26 09:29:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I say tell them and get it over with. Your parents will finally get use to the idea,your their son no matter what. Good Luck!
2006-10-26 09:27:34 · answer #10 · answered by Backwoods Barbie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋