Ok so last week was my b-day My then boyfriend took me out to a nice dinner bought me a nice present and wrapped it in paper he made on the computer of all of our pictures put into a collage. Sounds great right? Until yesterday when I get this email.
I'm sorry I haven't been around the phone too much, but... I've been doing a lot of thinking about us, as I do on the weekends it seems, and I think that we need to be apart. When I really analyze "us" it just seems like we both want different things. I've enjoyed our time together very much, but beyond....I can't really see us being together for a long period of time. I think that if we continued to see each other (going to concerts, etc.) it would further lead to feelings being hurt even more in the future. I'm soo sorry if I hurt you, but I feel it's for the best.
Okay guys - I really like this guy. Do I just leave it like this? Do I try to go to him and talk to him? I tried calling him yest. and went to voicemail Help
2006-10-26 06:53:31 · 32 answers · asked by T C 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's going to be VERY hard, but just let it go. Do NOT call him or email him or anything. Seriously - don't!!!! That's what he's expecting you to do - call, cry, beg, etc.. You'll make a much bigger noise about the whole thing if he doesn't hear a peep from you. In fact, you may hear from him because he's wondering why he hasn't heard from you!!
I've been through this before and I promise that what guys respond to the most is NO CONTACT. Even if it hurts and he was a total jerk by sending you an EMAIL breaking up with you, try to move on and know that what he did is about HIM and not about you. Do you really want to be with someone that didn't have the consideration to talk to you about that in person? Sounds immature to me.
Be the person with integrity and just brush this rude guy off. You're better off without him!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-10-26 07:00:13 · answer #1 · answered by atxtallchick 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know it really sucks to get this kind of message from an email.
He is telling you how he is feeling. You just need to accept that it's over. For what ever reasons he has, he feels that there is not future between the two of you.
Maybe you should accept it and be thankful that he is telling you how he is feeling. I'd suggest you respond to him and telll you that you respect him and how he feels and would like to say goodbye.
These things happen ALL the time. Look, people grow and change all the time. Sometimes we are with someone and realize one day that I'm a different person and I have different needs.
His message was not mean or said anything negative. He was probably just trying to be honest about a difficult situation. It's hard to tell someone something when you know it's going to hurt.
Seems like he did try to do the right thing here. You just have to respect that he is changing and moving on in life and it has nothing to do with you. It's just that people are people and do what they feel is best for themselves.
2006-10-26 07:07:28 · answer #2 · answered by Jerrid 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but it's time to let it go and move on. After receiving that message, have some self respect by accepting it and not trying to force a relationship, which in the end you'll be sorry you did.
There are a lot of fish in the sea. You never know what's around the next corner, so look ahead, not back. If it was good, then leave it that way. If ever he decides to contact you again, then you will be in control the situation. Maybe you'll decide he missed out on the best thing he ever had.
Relax, enjoy and good luck!
2006-10-26 07:04:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow... Talk about mixed messages with this guy.One minute he is extremely thoughful,caring,and romantic and the next minute he wants to take a "break".
Im almost positive he is afraid of falling in love with you.It sounds like once he started to open himself to the possibility to a caring relationship.Something in him shut off.I think he got scared sweetheart and this is the only way he knows how to handle this fear.
My best advice to you ... would be to sit down and think of every reason why you guys shouldnt end it.Take notes if you have to.Because you may only get one chance to express how you feel.If you do not get a hold of him after you have thought it out.Leave it on his voicemail and then let it be.The more you try to call him and he does not take your calls.Will strengthen his resolve to end it.If he wants a break then you give it to him. But......... There are definitly other ways to get his attention.Such as accidently showing up were you know he will be.Dressed to kill.And completly ignoring him.Not only will that show him that you can move on without him.But your rubbing it in his face that he wants something he cannot have.Until he decides he wants you back.Start seeing people socially so that it will get back to him.Of course do not do anything you do not want getting back to him.But go on with your life.That's what made him attractive to you in the first place.
If none of this works.Remember that it is not your fault it didnt work out.Honestly, he sounds like a minipulative jerk.Nobody goes from hot to cold like that for no reason.Keep your head up if he is not the one.Mr right is out thre I promise.Good luck
2006-10-26 07:09:58 · answer #4 · answered by serena 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
T ry to get in touch with him face to face if u can. i think u deserve an explanation to ur face instead of through some e-mail. if u get the voice mail leave a message telling him to call u back so u can sit down and talk. what he did seems like it came out of nowhere it was ur birthday then he broke up with u. something tells me he was waiting for ur brithday to pass first. if he really wants it to be over then after u hear what he has to say leave him alone. a woman should never appear desperate or in need of a man show him u don't need him and u can find better. it might take a while to get over him but u will eventually. who knows he might come crawlaing back and when he does u can have the upper hand as to whether u want him or not but for now if he doesn't want u just leave him alone don't keep calling. thats prbly what he wants anyways. but i suggest move on with ur life he's prbly not man enough 4 u
2006-10-26 07:01:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He has decided that he doen't want to continue the relatinoship.
It would have been better if he had the balls to talk to you about it face to face, but he didn't. In either case he has made a decision and you should respect that.
What I believe he is really saying though is that he has found someone else that he wants to date, but he needs to break up with you first so that he isn't cheating on you. Personally I'd rather have this happen than have someone cheat on me - it still hurts but at least he is being somewhat honest about it.
So what can you do? Start having fun and looking around for others to have fun with. Someone will come around and you will find them and then you will once again have a partner to have fun with!
2006-10-26 07:00:46 · answer #6 · answered by .... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should give him what he wants... TRUST ME!!! Guys find out what they want through pain and suffering. I know this leaves you with nothing but giving him times will make him realize that he likes you just that much. Another possibility is that he is trying to make sure you don't get hurt badly if he chooses something else. Whether its being single or dating someone else. Either way the one thing you can do is leave him be until he contacts you again and realizes in his own heart what he wants. That way you can both be happy and have time to think.
2006-10-26 06:58:39 · answer #7 · answered by Angel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I personally would have went into psycho mode! However I must say this he didn't have enough respect (balls) to tell you face to face. I say let him go, and I know that it hurts and what's even more disappointing is that you didn't have your "say" in the decision. So what I suggest you do so that the questions of "why", and "how could he" fester inside; leave him either a detailed voice mail, email, or letter that allows you to get whatever you felt was left unsaid on your end and let it go. Worst case scenario is...............you'll find better. So with that said I would also suggest that you rid yourself of anything that will keep you "attached" to him asap!!!!!!!
2006-10-26 07:08:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let him go. If he's got it set in his mind enough to try and break up... then let him. Chalk it up to lessoned learned, have yourself a good cry and move on. Who wants to be with someone who obviously doesn't want to be in a relationship with you? Besides, once you let him loose, he may come back realizing he was wrong. If you beg and plead and fight it all the way.. he'll never consider coming back.
If you do get back together, you want it to be because he honestly has feelings for you.. NOT because you convinced him to come back by crying or whatever. It's gonna suck but you will live, and heck.. the next Mr.Right might be just waiting for you to become available ;-).
2006-10-26 07:01:34 · answer #9 · answered by Y knot 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would not call him. It may be his loss but he'll realize it eventually. In the meantime you will have had a chance to get over it and meet someone else. Although it seems at this point like you'll never like anyone else as much, the truth is there are plenty of others out there and you will find happiness again with someone else.
2006-10-26 06:57:21 · answer #10 · answered by auskan2002 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋