My fiance has an eight year old son and I think it's about time he knows about the birds and the bees. His mom hasn't said a word... is it too early? What's a good way to explain?
2006-10-26 05:59:19 · 40 answers · asked by liverlips86 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
1. He is asking questions
2. Smartass, I'm his stepmom for ***** sake!
2006-10-26 06:20:20 · update #1
That's extremely early. I didn't hear it until I was 10 or 11.
2006-10-26 06:01:07 · answer #1 · answered by CelebrateMeHome 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I just wanted to add in here that all these folks who are saying how young 8 years old is are right, but I don't think they are thinking about the world we live in today either. An 8 year old needs to know more than we did when we were that age. If there is anyone on yahoo answers who has never seen a teenage mom I would be surprised. Girls are getting pregnant commonly by age 16 now a days and I have personally known a few that were between 11 and 14 when they got pregnant the first time. My friends 9 year old daughter has hit puberty and has been having her period for 6 months now, Open your eyes, waiting to talk about any sort of sexual issues until a kid is 11 or 12 is stupid and irresponsible.
Don't get me wrong, I don't think you need to go out and start buying condoms, but I certainly think that this kid should know something. Hopefully he already knows the proper names for genitals, and should probably know that babies come from a man and a woman being together (though he probably doesn't need to know exactly how that happens). He should know that love and caring are important parts of a relationship, but I would leave it at that along with a much longer talk about respect for himself and others.
On a further note, talk to mom before you bring this up with the son, let her know what you intend on telling him and listen to her is she thinks some things are too much. Also make sure you are prepared to answer any questions he has, and also prepare for him to have none at all. Good luck.
2006-10-26 06:24:40 · answer #2 · answered by averyanne77 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that many of the people answering this question are not living in the real world. Children are having sex by the age of eight and even younger. AS parents we have to start education them from the very beginning. Every question they ask should be answered thoroughly and truthfully, don't use pet names for body parts etc. My son is eight and had lots of questions instead if ignoring him or telling him not to ask those questions( like many parents do) I told him the answers. I showed him the film the miracle of life and he has not been asking near as many questions. He knows what sex is and why I tell him he should wait until he is married. He also knows that I did not wait and my reasons for telling him to wait even though I did not. We have discussed all these issues and any others he might come up with. I have created an open dialog and hopefully he will continue to discuss these things with me.
2006-10-26 15:46:02 · answer #3 · answered by AlwaysRight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not too early if he is ready for it. Wait until the question comes up, and then answer. This "Where do baby's come from?" thing is a process that kids should start learning the moment the question comes out of their mouths. A 2-4 year old should be told as much of the truth as they can fathom (for instance "from a mommy's tummy"). By the time they are 8 they should know that ADULTS have sex, and what occurs when ADULTS have sex, and that the result of ADULTS having sex is pregnancy and babies. (If you didn't catch it, the word ADULTS should be emphasized) Withing a few years this young boy will be going through changes that he will either expect or be scared to death by.... and its probably best if he knows what the results are before he gets a chance to try them.
2006-10-26 06:09:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a little too early, My mom and I had the talk when I was 9 and had gotten my period. I did not understand any of it, could not comprehend at such a young age the complexity of it. I just knew that for some reason all females eventually start this thing called a period and it happens every month. I was 9 for goodness sake. 3rd grade. It was way too early. I would suggest at least another year or two. Why do you think it is time to dole out that information? Is he asking about it?
2006-10-26 06:04:47 · answer #5 · answered by Amber L 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would only explain this if he is asking questions. For an eight year old you should keep it as simple as possible, they don't really need any details. Usually schools give some sort of sex education starting in 5th grade, so if he isn't asking then there is no need to worry about it. And besides I think it would be better if you left this discussion up to his parents because if you tell him about it that could start a whole bunch of drama.
2006-10-29 00:12:25 · answer #6 · answered by mystique133333 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a book out there you can probabley find at a book store in the mall, but it is a cartoon book that clearly shows and reads very easy words for kids about sex and where babies some from. I wish I could remember the book and I have it at home but I am at work. I kept the book all my life and handed it to my 2 boys when they were ready and could read good. I think it is called, "where do I come from?" not sure but like I said it is a cartoon book which shows body parts and how babies are made. I highly recomment it. Good luck
2006-10-26 06:09:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it shouldn't be a talk, it should be a series of talks. whenever someone comes up pregnant and is unmarried, we would talk around our kids about how having sex before marriage risks having a baby with no family. over the years, the information increases.
when he's askingn questions, just answer his questions. very sparingly, because they are often not asking what we think they're asking. give a little detail to response to their question, ask if that's what they wanted to know, and move on if it is.
answer all questions honestly and with real words, not baby words. include your values, like no premarital sex, where it is appropriate in the answer.
how are you his step mom and his dad's fiance? if you're living together and not being married and he knows you are, you are messing up his sexuality big time.
2006-10-26 08:05:30 · answer #8 · answered by cassandra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just answer the questions that he has. This is the first phase of him getting to know the birds and the bees. Children will usually ask questions at this age that they usually can understand. Don't give too many details as not to confuse him...just start by saying / asking him what he knows and what kinds of questions he has before jumping right in!
2006-10-26 09:03:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should have the "eight year old" sex talk. Don't give him too much information or it will scar him for life. I know someone who over did the sex talk and now the kid thinks his dad is a monster whenever the bedroom door is closed and she is in there with him. Get age appropriate materials and ask him if there is anything he wants to talk about or confirm anything he's already heard at school. It's not too early to give him some information. Nothing too graphic and the parents should agree on how and when. Check at the local library for books and information on how to talk to kids about sex.
2006-10-26 06:06:15 · answer #10 · answered by eehco 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think i was probably 11 or 12 when my mom had this talk with me. I think the best thing you can do is simply tell them without it being weird. Alot of the time it's weird for the parent to explain things to someone so young, but simply be honest and do it in a way that is comfortable for you and your son. This is a very normal part of life and as long as he knows you are open and honest it will go just fine:) Good luck.
2006-10-26 06:05:23 · answer #11 · answered by leahpar77 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋