what should i do? she always been my best friend.... do you think i should take it furthur??

Question

my best friend and me(im a guy, shes a girl, but thats it)went for a movie the other day. on the way back home,we stopped at a cafe. while we were there, it started to rain. so we ended up staying there a looooooooooong time.... we started to chat about the coming months and she told me her parents were taking her and her brother to europe for a 2 month tour. i told her id miss her and we started talking about something else. when the rain finally stopped, i walked her home. when we were on her porch, she put her arms around my neck, and sang the chorus of 'im leaving on a jetplane' softly to me. then she kissed me on the cheek. and skipped off inside
ive never had 'those' feelings for her before.... and i dont know if i will in the future. do you think i should take a chance? she is really sweet, and if it works out i know i wont regret it. my only problem is, if it doesnt work, we may lose our friendship; i could never deal with that cos shes my best friend in the whole world.......

Answer 1

Whatever you do now, it will be with you for the rest of your life. So let's rephrase the question a bit:

Do you want to always wonder what 'might have been' if you had only taken the chance?

Even if you don't try a romantic relationship, you may STILL not be friends in a year. You have no way of knowing. People grow apart sometimes; accidents happen; misunderstandings occur. What you are risking is NOT a life-long friendship. For all you know, she may stop being your friend BECAUSE you don't show any romantic interest in her.

To go further, what kind of friend ends a friendship because a romantic relationship doesn't work out? I suspect that any friendship so fragile wasn't much of a friendship to begin with. Real friends sometimes step on each others' toes because they're too close, or don't communicate because they're too far, but they're always pulled back again. Surely you're already been through SOME trials of your friendship with this person... do you have any reason to believe your friendship won't survive another trial?

So I say go for it. Just be reasonable about it. If she's not interested, back off. That's okay. If you try and it doesn't work out, you can agree on your differences and go back to a more casual relationship. That's what friends do!

Answer 2

If you don't have feelings and might not, then no, don't try it because you will lose her if you break up. It sometimes happens that people stay friends, but it takes a lot of maturity and it is rare. If you think you can, talk to her, make sure she agrees if it doesn't work out, you will both try to act mature and be friends. I would wait till after the Europe trip though, being away may clear up those feelings, you may meet someone, she might meet someon.

Answer 3

I think that you should take the chance. If you two are good enough friends then even if it doesn't work, you'll still be able to remain friends. Actually in my past experiance a being with a friend can be the best relationship ever, and when or if it does end it always works out.

Answer 4

Aww, I imagined something from the movies.

Maybe she didn't realize (till now) she had these feelings for you . I would wait for her to come back from Europe to reveal those feelings for her. See how you really feel when she returns - she will too.

You're on point! The hardest part will be losing the friendship if things work out. Just remember, this is always a risk in getting romantic with your once "platonic" friendship.

Answer 5

i'd wait until after the europe trip. see how you feel then. that'll give you time to actually miss her, and figure out if those feelings are true or fleeting. sometimes a moment is just a moment. but when she gets back, telling her how you feel is within perfect reason. the time might give her an opportunity to think about how she really feels too. you never know, she might end up making the decision (one way or the other) for you.

Answer 6

well first of all talk to her and ask her what she really thinks about the (friendship) relationship between you guys if she agrees that there is something else other than "just friends" well talk it out and if you two decide that it's not worth it losing your best friend over a faulty relationship as boyfriend/girlfriend well don't even go there. it's just only a communication thing that only you two have to figure out. so good luck my friend and hope everything comes out for the best.

Answer 7

be around her again and see what u feel if u still feel that way tell her. i think her kissing u even on the cheek i a sign of something more. take a chance cuz if u don't u will always wonder if it could have been more.

Answer 8

I think you should wait it out and think about it more while she is gone. You're right in that it could cost you your friendship. Perhaps this is the sweet beginning of something more. Almost seems like it, but wait and let your gut help you decide.

Answer 9

I think you should fgo for it if yout hink she will take it well. After that, relationships may or may not work. It is a fact of life.

Best friends can be the best spouses... Good luck!

Answer 10

Oh my goodness, how exciting for you! I'm a chance taker, and I would so put myself out there, you never know she could have the same feeling for you! Listen to your heart if it's telling you to go for it then I think you should!