He doesn't want to rock the boat by asking her to have the baby take a paternity test- my husband is about 90% sure it's his and is negotiating child support-(out of court with her) he doesn't want to force a paternity and drive her to child support court if it is- he would rather pay the little bit she's asking for and be done with it. I need to know for sure, I think he needs to ask for a paternity test- He doesn't think so- Is there anyway to say for sure this baby is his- his family states it looks like him- neither one of us have seen it yet- just told by family members that it does look like him. Help
2006-10-26 04:08:06 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
The only way to know for sure it is take the test. He really needs to have a paternity test done, and he needs to go through the courts. He could pay her for years, and she could still go to court and say he didn't pay. He needs to do this legally through the courts.
2006-10-26 04:09:13 · answer #1 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There are websites that offer mail-in paternity tests that are relatively inexpensive. (I found one years ago for $75.) The only problem is is that those tests are not admissible in court. At least it would give you a piece of mind (cheaply) and you can then continue w/ the proceedings of child support. Just b/c he asks for a test, doesn't mean he's trying to be cruel, but he has every right to know it's his child if the mother will be accepting financial support from him. Without a paternity or blood test (which are very basic), there's really no way of knowing for sure. Good luck!
2006-10-26 04:15:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way to be positive is to take the paternity test.
He should have a child support agreement written up and signed by both parties and an attorney. Be sure the agreement states that if, at any time, the baby is proven not to be his, he will not be held responsible for child support. Also have him ask that the agreement states that she cannot revise it at a later date. She may be dumb enough to fall for it! If she is, then after the document is signed, have him do a DNA test.
He could also take the baby for the DNA test without her ever knowing about it. If it is not his, he will pay nothing! If it is his, she never has to know he did the test.
2006-10-26 04:16:15 · answer #3 · answered by Kailey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Outside of a paternity test, there's no way to tell for sure. Once he starts paying child support and admits paternity, there is absolutely nothing to stop her from going to court and demanding the full amount due to her for the child under law - for one kid it's usually something like 17% of father's income before taxes. And if he decides to get a paternity test then and discovers child is not his, he may be ordered to continue paying anyway as it would be in the best interest of the child.
Please note the following: When you consent to the entry of a paternity order, you consent for life. Most jurisdictions will not allow you to escape the consequences of that order, including the requirement that you pay child support, even if you can later prove that you are not the child's biological father. If there is any chance that you will resent the child, or wish to break off your relationship to the child, if you ultimately learn that you are not the child's biological father, by all means obtain a DNA test before admitting that you are the child's father. Some studies suggest a non-paternity rate for children born inside marriage of twenty percent or more. Outside of marriage, you have even fewer assurances. If you consent to being named as the child's father, be sure that you are willing to live up to that designation no matter what you may later learn.
2006-10-26 04:13:01 · answer #4 · answered by Pewds Fan 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Does he have any birth marks that the baby might share? Or does it look extraordinarily like him? He can ask to see the baby, especially if the mom says it is his, he has every right to see him/her.
Either way, nothing is proof positive without a paternity test. If the baby is his, the mother should have no problem taking the test. On the other hand, she has every right to be quite upset at him if he asks for one if she was faithful to him when they were together.
Either way, if he claims to be the Dad, then why force him to ask for a test if he thinks it's his? Maybe he wants the baby? It might be because you are uncomfortable with the baby by another woman and he is now your husband. Nobody can blame you for being uncomfortable with the situation, but don't make him resent this baby, because he could start resenting you instead.
Good luck in this trying time and blessed be!
2006-10-26 04:22:55 · answer #5 · answered by LadyMagick 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are married and share funds with your husband you have every right to request this baby have a paternity test. The child support is coming from your family. And when people say "but the baby looks like him" its the most uneducated idiocy I've ever heard. I don't look like anyone in my family but I am my parents child. The only way to know for sure is a test.
2006-10-26 04:13:00 · answer #6 · answered by AGNY 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm going threw the same thing my self. It is always good to take the paternity test to be sure, not just because of the money, for the baby sake. Because if he don't the baby will suffer in the long run every child deserves to know there parents. Good Luck!!!!!
2006-10-26 04:51:49 · answer #7 · answered by Sandy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why pay money for a child that is not his? because the mother is asking for a 'little bit' she may be hoping to get financial aid out of guilt to avoid a paternity test, proving the child is of a different father and possibly not getting support. protect yourself legally and have a paternity test done. if he has to pay more in child support, does it really matter? if the child is his, he needs to be responsible and pay accordingly. it is not fair to the child, not to mention your husband, to grow up thinking one man is his father when it actually isn't. do the right thing for everyone involved and avoid complications later and get the test.
2006-10-26 04:17:16 · answer #8 · answered by deathwishpussy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should know for sure too. Paternity tests are not difficult (just a little blood test) and if he is the Dad, then he should pay the child support.
2006-10-26 04:12:11 · answer #9 · answered by joeanonymous 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I are going through the sam thing and he is paying child support through DCSE. We actually went to court yesterday for paternity he has his test on Monday. It is also never a good thing to negociate child support w/o the state being involved. I work in Acct. and I have this case now where an employee was putting the money directly into her bank account and then she went and filed w/ the state. he gets no credit for the money he gave her because its not recorded. and now he owes back support.
2006-10-26 06:04:20 · answer #10 · answered by keyab 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋