My boyfriend is dabbling in New Ageism. It's getting more and more serious. To the point where when I'm upset, he won't contact me or hear me out because he believes in the Law of Attraction (where negativity attracts more negativity). I don't know what to do anymore. Whatever happened to in sickness and in health? We've been together quite happily for a year now and he's a wonderful guy, but he's just too gullible and easily influenced by other people's opinions. Should we try to work it out? I care deeply but I really need someone who's going to be there for me and there are others willing to, if he's not. But of course, I love him enough not to jump ship just like that. Help!
2006-10-26 01:31:59 · 24 answers · asked by janicebks 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Jump ship. It sounds like you got other guys on hold in case something goes wrong with this relationship you're in.
2006-10-26 01:40:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is not going to support you when you need it, and only be around for the good times, he is acting selfishly. I do not care if it is because of "New Ageism" or something else.
Tell him that there is a corollary to the law of attraction, where support attracts support, and the lack of support causes collapse. If you really care about him, you may want to try to work it out, but someone who is "just too gullible and easily influenced by other people's opinions" is never going to change.
If it were me, I would limit the relationship, if not totally end it. Tell him that it is his choice, he can be there for you when you need it, or you will not be there for him when things are good!
Good luck whatever you decide!
2006-10-26 01:40:36 · answer #2 · answered by fire4511 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl you need to move on. If he is so easily influenced by others its just gonna cause problems your whole life. Be live me I know.
My situation was not as bad as yours but I had been dating this guy for about 3 years and he was always so worried about what his mom thought and wanted that he forgot about my feelings alot of the time. It took me a while to get up the courage to get out of that relationship because I loved him. I did though and I have been happily married now for 6 years with 2 beautiful babies. I wish you the best of luck.
2006-10-26 01:40:48 · answer #3 · answered by wesgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you have a lot of hurdles to a life of happiness with this man:
1-he wont contact you
2-he wont listen to you
3-he views you as negative energy
4-you dont practice the same spirituality as him
5-he is too gullible and influenced
6-he doesn't give you the feeling of security and permanence a successful relationship is built on
You have a few strengths:
1-you have a year together
2-you love him
I know from experience that you can love someone who isn't right for you. If you don't want to live your life the way he wants to live his, you owe it to each other (and to YOURSELF) to find someone else. Trying to stay with him will only lead to frustration and anger, which will build resentment. He seems unwilling to compromise and you will lose on everything if he is so unyielding.
Good luck. You're in a bad spot!
2006-10-26 01:37:47 · answer #4 · answered by DivaDynamite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to talk some sense into him, bring him back down to earth. Being easily influenced, you can possibly use that in your favor! It would be very difficult to give up, since you know you guys can be very happy together. Give him some time, and get a few other folks with some good sense on your side as well, can't hurt. Good luck.
2006-10-26 01:37:56 · answer #5 · answered by janet r 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like hes already out of the relationship to me! You know what you want to do so do it. He wont listen to you and a gullible and easily influenced guy probably isnt good news in the long term. Follow your heart.
2006-10-26 01:36:15 · answer #6 · answered by huggz 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell him what you need out of the relationship, and if he can't give that to you, its time to look else where.
I'm like you, I don't like it when people are so easily influenced by others opinions. Just try to tell him how you feel, and hopefully you two can work it out. Good luck.
2006-10-26 01:38:04 · answer #7 · answered by Kbailey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your fella wont ever discuss anything bad, fight with you or discuss issues that he doesn't want to because " negativity attracts negativity " wow!!! that's great I won't ever do any ironing cos ironing will attract more ironing.
Now you can see how stupid that is why waste any more of your time with a guy that wont sort things out & prefers to just stick his head in the sand.
Dump him at least until he matures
2006-10-26 01:37:07 · answer #8 · answered by madamspud 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hhmm.. i understand wat u r going thru.. it's really tough when the one whom u love so deeply change... anyway, like u said, he's easily influenced by others. y don't u try to influence him back? u should try to bring him back to the 'correct path'..... if he's still like tat, u should ask him whether is he still serious abt u.. if his answer is yes, then tell him tat u got to work sth out or else the relationship won't last long... and if he doesn't, then girl u haf the answer.. leave him n find someone who will treasure n cherish u more than him... it will be easier for u knowing tat u haf tried to save the relationship..
2006-10-26 01:41:39 · answer #9 · answered by SyaKiRa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, "in sickness and in health" is for married people, not boyfriend/girlfriend. Kick him to the curb; he sounds to me like he enjoys the "laws" of New Age-ism more than your feelings. Good luck to you.
2006-10-26 01:34:07 · answer #10 · answered by DMBthatsme 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋