A DOG'S DIARY
7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
11 pm - Oh boy!
Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!
A CAT'S DIARY
Day 183 of my captivity. My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre
little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am
forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the
hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the
furniture. Tomorrow I
may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to
kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking
almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs. In an
attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again
induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair - must try this on
their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in
an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to
try to
strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about
what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event! . However, I could hear the noise and
smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was
due to my powers of inducing "allergies." Must learn what this is
and
how to use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The
dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is
obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an
informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety
is assured. But I can wait; it is only a matter of time……
2006-10-26 01:04:52 · 15 answers · asked by marnibrown1 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
I wish I could give ya'all best answer... thanks for the comments..
2006-10-27 00:16:45 · update #1
That was very funny.
We have two inmates and one idiot in our house, and you nailed them.
2006-10-26 01:13:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When precise Musicians equivalent to Michael rather believe and get into the track, their frame simply does matters - it is like they cross right into a trance. I bet that is a type of matters! It changed into somewhat trademark of his and I bet it caught after that :-)
2016-09-01 02:54:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reason #172 why i hate cats! lol I know uv seen that movie Cats & Dogs.....yep cats are evil and vengfull! lol I never looked at a cat the same way after watchin that movie...this just confirmed my feelings of negativity twards them...Thanks ! lol
2006-10-26 01:23:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That was cute, considering I have 2 cats and a dog...
2006-10-26 01:22:45 · answer #4 · answered by Happy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Very cute!
2006-10-26 01:08:42 · answer #5 · answered by rebecca_sld 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first one is ok, but I couldn't read the 2nd cause it's so loooooooong, :)))))))
2006-10-26 01:08:14 · answer #6 · answered by bilezlatko 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This was VERY FUNNY!!! 10/10 *s A+++, I absolutely loved it!!! Thanks for sharing!
2006-10-26 02:00:58 · answer #7 · answered by Asterisk_Love♥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Funny......
thanks for sharing : - )
2006-10-26 01:13:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
very funny ha ha
2006-10-26 01:09:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hee hee
2006-10-26 01:06:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋