WHT should i do? plz be serious?

Question

me and my guy hav been going out for mo than a year now....(1 year and 4 months) i have told my family abt him. even my aunt & uncle, my close cousins all know.....but my guy has never told abt me to his family...he's such a great guy...90% of wht i expected my guy to be....and all that...

now my parents are causing trouble because they dont accept this relationship. and im always being pushed arnd abt it...and i argue alot with my parents and we have many problems at home...but my guy is totally cool with his family and is doing very fine...

my prob is...y is he doing this....? he has asked me in marriage and i accepted it...but still, he hasnt told his family abt me... I asked him several tyms to tell his family..me being a gal had the gutss to talk to my family...he's 6 years older than me, but he doesn't... I told him if he doesnt talk to his parents abt me within this week, i'd let him go...
wht do u think of this situation

im 20 and he's 25

Answer 1

I must admit that I would not want my daughter with a young man who has not introduced her to his parents. After all, marriage adds you to that family and if they do not know about you or you about them, that could cause a difficulty before the marriage gets underway. Perhaps this is why your parents are "causing trouble and won't accept the relationship."

As a mother, I had a hard time accepting one of my son's girlfriends due to her character. Because I am an open minded parent and want my son to be happy, I did not interfere and they ended up having a child together. My theory is if he is happy, who am I to interfere. So far, they are doing well. Most parents always have their child's best interest at heart. They are only concerned for your happiness and probably fear trouble down the line with his parents not knowing about you.

Typically, when a couple gets together and takes the path towards marriage, they usually have already met one another's parents. This makes it easier to tell them of the engagement and upcoming nuptials. Your guy is going to have a double task of not just introducing his family to the woman of his dreams and the fact that he is marrying her.

Perhaps you can talk further with your guy to understand why he will not introduce you to his parents. He could also be afraid of recrimination from his parents, especially if they are strict and he has had bad experience introducing special people to his parents. Sometimes parents over react and get involved in their child's (adult or not) life, when they should allow him/her to make their own decisions. So try to talk more in depth with him about this before you make your final decision.

Also, talk with your parents with the hope that you can understand where they are coming from. ;)

Answer 2

Focus on this goal, to become serious in life. Its fun to to not be serious at times, to joke and laugh, yet like you said, there comes a time to be serious. Try, getting a job, where you must be serious, when working. That can get you into a good habit. When you want to not be serious, always ask yourself is it worth being funny right now, or should I be serious this time? The more you question and ponder on things in your head, the more you yourself will make the right choice on seriousness. I hope this helps. As for being a fun loving guy, who smiles alot, thats Great! Never quit that, thats a GOOD thing to have.

Answer 3

That he s hiding something.
He could easily still be married to someone else, or he has a criminal record or children from someone else or he is just a plain and simple liar.
There are lots of more reasons i could mention but you get the picture.
It is important that a female should know the guy's background or at least where he comes from coz at the end of the day it all boils down to honesty,security and trust > you have given him all that but got none in return from him.
you have already made the decision about what you going to do stick to it and be strong. rather find out what you need to know now then months or years down the line.
Good luck

Answer 4

First of all you should stop arguing with your parents or relatives.Secondly you should ask your guy weather he is interested in you or not?
If yes then ask him to talk abt you with his parents in a specific period of time (which you desire) & if not then push him away.
Friend if you don't like my suggestion then just calm down and think over the whole situation again.BEST OF LUCK!

Answer 5

I don't know what to think because I don't know how old you are. I'll make it simple for you. If he's not telling his family about you and you're supposed to be getting married there's something wrong. Also, if you're still living at home you are probably still too young to be contemplating marriage anyway. A harsh reality to face may be that he's taking advantage of you because you're young and stupid (don't be offended, we're all stupid just at different degrees). Don't depend on him to make you happy, make sure that you're working towards your own goals. That way if this guy doesn't turn out to be what he seems to be, you still have your own career path and life plans to follow. Good luck.

Answer 6

i know EXACTLY how you feel. Is your boyfriend close to his family or is he distant?i know you said he was "cool" with them, but what i mean is, does he see them often? i met my husband almost 3 years ago and i immediately introduced him to all of my family, who i am very close with. But he never would talk about his family or go see them. i mean he sees some of them on a regular basis...but others, it was like they were not even his family. it really hurt my feelings in the beginning b/c i felt left out. but now that i have gotten to know him a lot better...i realized that he isn't doing it to hurt me, he just doesn't care to see his family. there is even one of his brothers that i have only met once in passing and i have never met this brothers wife or kids. so dont end the relationship until you find out the real reason that he doesn't introduce you...good luck!! P.S. I know you said that he was 90% of what you want your guy to be, but unless you feel that he is 100% then dont agree to marry him, you'll regret it.

Answer 7

One before you go any further sit down and have him tell why the reason, not lying and no beating around the bush of why he will not tell his parents about you.
Second of all the deal with your parents, you are twenty years old, while they have some say in the situation, you are twenty and can pretty much do as you like.

Answer 8

there is reason why he does not want his family to know about you, and you need to get down to the bottom of it...b/c it's disrespectful and it makes it look as if he's hiding something...my guess is he is afraid of what his family might think of you....they must expect others to live up to their high expectations....it's almost like he's saying to you that your not good enough for his family to meet....i wouldnt take that off of anyone and it's a good thing you gave him an ultimatum but you need to mean it....b/c if you don't then he won't take a word you say serious and you'll end up never meeting his family....so please mean what you say b/c that is degrading rather you know it or not....however i hope everything works out fine...good luck!!!

Answer 9

If he hasnt told his parents about you then something is wrong. You know it in your heart too. Dont you?

What are your ages and what is it that your parents dont like about this relationship? That will help in giving the best answer.

Answer 10

Well, I wonder why this guy hasn't told his family about you and asked you to marry him. Have you even met his family? These actions don't seem to me like a true person in love. When some one is in love they want to tell the whole world including his family.
(One note: Please don't use text shorthand it is very hard to follow.)