We lived together for three years before we married and I thought he was divorced. We married September 9,2006 at the Dunsmuir in Oakland. Colors, black and purple. We spent a whole month on our honeymoon in places like Arizona and New York, it was wonderful. I was led to believe that he was divorced and now I find out that his wife of fifteen years, not only thought they would reconcile but instead HE has filed for divorce. His wife and children lives in GA and he states that she is an unreasonable, and controlling person; she won't allow the children to speak to him (at least that is what he states ). Can I believe anything he says! Is my marriage built on this foundation worth anything?
2006-10-25 21:51:37 · 15 answers · asked by ilovemychildren 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When we married, I thought he was divorced but HE IS NOT! Are we really married? Why did I not see the signs? How do I expect my marriage to turn out if he does this to someone else? He is Black& Asian, I am White and the 1st wife is Black.
2006-10-25 21:55:41 · update #1
Obviously you aren't married. He is a bigamist (which is illegal) and a liar, so obviously you can't trust him. You have issues here which you might want to discuss with a therapist.
2006-10-25 21:59:51 · answer #1 · answered by maigen_obx 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Beyond the color thing, no u r not legally married to him as long as he has a legal first wife and children on top of that. It's hard to concieve that a man doesn't know whether he is married or divorced before he marries again. In the US bigamy is a crime punishable by confinement and fines. Should his first wife decide to charge him he is cooked and u would be out everything u've put into the marriage and the time u've spent with him. Get out while u can and take all that belongs to u before the court gives it to the true and first wife and u r left on the streets homeless and penniless. What a mess, good luck getting out of it. Protect ur interests.
2006-10-26 05:02:10 · answer #2 · answered by papabeartex 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
WOW, you've been living together for three long years and your just now getting this information? Well take it from someone who been there, NO you are not legally married. So I hope your on about 10 doses of birth control, because you got yourself a con man. Who paid for the month long honeymoon? Hope it wasn't you! Are you also saying he has NOT seen his kids in the past three years? Real nice dad! Must also mean no child support has been paid out? Yea, you have a winner on your hands..Oh yea, when I called the Police on the loser I thought I was married too in the state where he was from to bring charges against him for bigamy, they said "bigamy,it's no big deal, same as not using a cross walk!" The story only got uglier! Call HIS wife, I am sure she'd like to give you details, sure can't do any harm now. Good luck!
2006-10-26 05:50:53 · answer #3 · answered by sue d 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not married! Well if he has filed for divorce maybe, just maybe he is trying to rectify something. But he knew all along he was still married. He lied to you and is now blaming her which sounds kind of standard. So when they (if) get divorced all that you two have now will belong to her and part of his pay for support as well. So aside from the exs issues he still knowingly lied to you. You need to start squirreling some money away as you will need it. The only foundation in a marriage is trust...... and you will never have that again.
2006-10-26 11:32:58 · answer #4 · answered by jackson 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You were never married. You can get it annulled and sue.
Everything he says is a lie.
He is a user. Don't trust him
You may not be the first nor the only. If you do marry him he will do the same to you.
Call the authorities to see if you can have him arrested.
Run. He may be after your money, house, car, insurance etc.
At least let him work out his current marriage situation first and take a break, see if he comes back.
Get away then ask your self the whys
2006-10-26 05:12:42 · answer #5 · answered by Red 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girlfriend, hate to say it but you are just his mistress who got played. he obviously was filling the REAL wife's head with thoughts of him coming back. no you can't believe a DAMN word that comes out of his mouth. he is obviously a LIAR and a good one at that. i don't know why you asked this question, you are going to believe his lying, cheating, no good a** because that's what you want to do. HELL NO you are not really married so therefore don't worry about a foundation. better cut him loose quick.
2006-10-26 05:02:52 · answer #6 · answered by sweettee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are married but in my country he would go to jail for having 2 wives.The whole relationship was built on lies and deciet he cant be trusted sorry but it is true there are cases where a male has had up to 5 wives at one time without any knowing about the others is your man like that ?hmm i wonder.!!
2006-10-26 05:01:30 · answer #7 · answered by john h 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
He is a bigamist, you are damned in the eyes of the Lord. You are an Adultress and should be stoned....there that said it all for you religious twats...so what you are not martried Big Deal it is only a pieceof paper like a list to Santa, you still hade a great day so stop whining and watch that weight
2006-10-26 04:54:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Why did he lie to you? Is he leading a double life maybe? If he has been lying to you all along..I don't think I would ever believe a word he says. If he wants to see his children he can go to court and let them deal with it..This guy is handing you a crock of ****.
2006-10-26 04:58:07 · answer #9 · answered by Shortydeb 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You r NOT married!!! He is legally married to someone else!!!! U r gonna believe anything he says??? He is a BIGAMIST!!!!!
2006-10-26 18:26:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋