I've met new male friends who are always teasing each other about being gay or having gay-like attitudes. This is just a game among them, but I feel very unconfortable because I am gay, so I just can't decide if I should remain silent or make a stand and tell them I'm gay.
2006-10-25 18:37:00 · 26 answers · asked by Santi Pazmi 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Make the stand. If they can't accept you for who you truly are, then they simply aren't worth it. The truth is, they might be uncomfortable.....at first. But if you can't be honest then the friendship won't last.
On another not if the friendship lasts and they make fun of you....reply
"You're just jealous cause you can't get a piece of this!"
2006-10-25 18:39:56 · answer #1 · answered by WILSON 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A couple of choices:
1) Keep silent. Depends on if you think they're being malicious or not. Some people 'tease' about gays and mean no harm, although it may make you uncomfortable. I'm not saying it's right, but it happens. If they are seriously bigoted, though, then you might want to step up.
2) Speak up. Say 'hey guys, that's not really that funny' and if they accuse you, be cool, say no, you're just more mature than that. And be the mature one. This is the best method; however, the fact that you actually are gay means you'll have to come out after saying no . . . so I don't really like it.
3) Come out. It's hard, but worth it in the end.
2006-10-26 01:46:32 · answer #2 · answered by cando_86 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes you should tell them you are gay. if you want to be a good friend you will be honest from the beginning. that is the very best thing to do when starting friendships; that way you are more likely to build long term strong friendships. of course i don't know how old you are or if you live in some small country town or not, but if you are mature and you feel comfortable in your surrondings you should not be in the closet at all if you want to live a happy truthful life. if they are real friends they will accept you for who you are and then just be sure to make it clear that their jokes make you uncomfortable. if you are a young and still in school then please beware of coming out and try to find out what other peoples opinions on gays are like. kids are so mean and you might get hurt. good luck.
2006-10-26 02:57:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh i know what ur talking about... so childish, and not even! I know many 5 - 10 year olds with a smarter more positive attitude and ideas about the issue. There will always be dumb people, kinda hard but if you wanna do something about it, just say it, you dont appreciate those kind of comments period! (although u will probably start them TEASING YOU and ONLY YOU after that) but trust me it only takes a smart comment to fix that, and not because these people start or actually want to respect but they wont understand what u mean and will not feel like dealing with that anymore! gooood LUCK!
2006-10-26 01:50:44 · answer #4 · answered by antoni_m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Laught it off. Coming out will prolly send a very awkward vibe within the group. If the gay jokes get more and more frequent and more and more hateful, maybe you got the wrong friends.
On the other side, you could counter attack.
Something like: "You sure love to talk about gayness a lot, closet case?" See how they react, and make your next move from there.
2006-10-26 01:43:47 · answer #5 · answered by GigGLeS! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should tell them that you are gay and then you will see if they are your friends or not. This is the healthiest choice you can make and it will save you allot of mental anguish and problems in the future. It's your life and it's ending one second at a time do you really have time for these games?
2006-10-26 01:40:34 · answer #6 · answered by Roger89 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would come out to them. I went through the same thing when I was younger, and it always paid off beneficially to me. When I would be around some condescending bigot, my friends would stand up for me too. They can't help the cause of acceptance if they don't know!
2006-10-26 01:43:05 · answer #7 · answered by Cub6265 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what I do (I'll make it opposite for obvious reasons) When they call each other gay, just say, "Well, thank God. I'm getting tired of pleasing all the men on my own." Assuming they know you're gay, of course... you didn't say. It worked for my friends, now they just leave it alone. If they don't know you're gay, there's not much you can do wthout outing yourself.
2006-10-26 09:52:47 · answer #8 · answered by Phedre D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every person who has the guts to walk out of that closet has family, friends, neighbors, teachers, employers, and colleagues who have the potential to change their mind on gay issues to a stance in our favor once they actually know/love/respect a gay person themselves. We fear what we do not understand. Put a face on their fear, so their fear no longer makes sense. Have your voice heard, help make us stronger—come out, come out, wherever you are!
Hugs!
2006-10-26 01:43:48 · answer #9 · answered by Bearable 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
i'm all for being out and proud, but make sure it's safe. guys are weird they may just decide to kick your *** to prove they're men. so make sure you play it smart. that said, i tell straight men who try to tease me or give me ****. "don't worry about it honey, i'm a size queen and you don't meet minimum size requirements" that usually shuts 'em up because the only way to continue that argument is to whip it out and prove me wrong , and thats never gonna happen lololololol
2006-10-26 01:52:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋