he is 44 and i want to have sex or should i say oral sex but by 10 at night he is fast asleep and it is really ruining our relationship and he has no idea its to that point....and have thinking of what he dont know wont hurt him and am wondering if maybe he is straying????
2006-10-25 17:23:52 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You and I are in much the same situation. I am 36 and my husband is 43. My husband works really hard all day (He owns a construction business and does manual labor with it). When he comes home, he is beat. In his thirties he used to could work like that all day long and come home and Scr*w all night long. Things have changed a bit now and if you grow in your relationship you will grow with it. My husband and I have. Everyone knows that women in their thirties want it more than women in their twenties. We are more comfortable with our bodies and know our bodies better and we know what we want.
So what you have here is just like what we've went through. He's older and tired when he gets home and we are ready to rip. There has got to me a medium. Talk to him and tell him that you have to compromise. You may not get it everytime you want.... please see his side too.
Also, go online and find some different things to do. I just did a search in yahoo on Erotic massage techniques and really found some good sites. It gave me some good ideas. Maybe if you spice things up, he won't get sleepy,...wink, wink. Also pick nights that you know he might not be as tired. If he's home where he belongs and you see no other signs of an affair, he's probably not having one. Good luck gal! Been there and it worked out good.
2006-10-25 17:41:31 · answer #1 · answered by sugarbud 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm...not sure I'm totally understanding your question. It sounds like you want to have sex, primarily oral, and he isn't willing to do that because he is asleep by the time that you get to bed? This is making you think that he might be straying?
It sounds to me like your man is having some sexual issues. He's at an age where a lot of men go through mid-life crises and start to have problems with thier sexual arousal. I wouldn't automatically think that he is straying, unless he has given you other indications. It sounds like you need to sit down and have a serious talk and figure out what things you can do to make sure that you are both feeling fullfilled in the relationship.
2006-10-26 00:29:08 · answer #2 · answered by missapparition 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ummmm . . . start getting up earlier in the morning and going to bed earlier at night? Morning lovemaking is good, too. Set his alarm a few minutes earlier and slip into the shower with him. Where there's a will . . .
Also, I wouldn't automatically assume cheating. He may have a tough job, work long hours (at work and at home), and need his 8 hrs. of sleep. If you are thinking about cheating shame on you!
2006-10-26 00:30:17 · answer #3 · answered by greyrider 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By 10 at night I'm usually tired too. Geez. Pick a better time already. Ever hear of morning or afternoon sex?
2006-10-26 00:26:34 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is there a magical fairy that only lets him perform oral sex after 10 pm??
2006-10-26 00:25:30 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When would he have time to stray? If he's bushed at night... Hell, wake him up!!! Staying up an additional 30 minutes for sex wouldn't kill him... Hell, he may sleep more soundly afterwards since it relaxes you so...
2006-10-26 00:31:42 · answer #6 · answered by James B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Comunication, Comunication, Comunication. Thats the key to a good relationship. Do you think he can read your mind? Tell him what you want and he might perk right up.
2006-10-26 00:29:35 · answer #7 · answered by sweetkooky 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm 38yrs.old..... been married for 22yrs.... have the same
problem...... but he works till 7:00 at night..comes home
eats supper and goes to bed....6 days a week............ then
on Sunday after he sleeps till noon........ he wants to spend
time with me.........by then his brother is down......... they
do what they want to do and I cook my supper.......FOR
my kids....... that's really the only reason were together......
my kids are my life.......
2006-10-26 00:44:52 · answer #8 · answered by jojo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he has a serious problem. Maybe you should try and nail him earlier in the evening.
2006-10-26 00:26:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you and him need to talk about this as far as . him not knowing belive me he will find out as well is it wort the . trust that is in your marrage to do what you are talking about . there is a old saying when you play you might get burined . this means that in tthe end you will be the loser. not him . in my opion?
2006-10-26 00:53:38 · answer #10 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋