what should we do to help them through this and when should they try again??
2006-10-25 10:36:48 · 25 answers · asked by reggie8485 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I know that I have no say as to when they try again I just wanted some words form some of you that have been there before. She is heavy spoting and having cramps and is going to Dr. im the morning if not the ER tonight. Thanks For all the words of hope and help
2006-10-25 13:34:39 · update #1
Today is Friday and my son called last night and she did misscarry. She is doing great health wise but they are dealing with the loss. Thanks to every one for your support.
2006-10-27 06:52:57 · update #2
Take her to the emergency room to find out. If she has one and "any" of the baby is left inside, she could set up gangrene inside, this happened to an aunt of mine who was stupid (err, superstitious) she thought by "going" to the doctor she WOULD lose it when she already had. She set up gangrene and almost died.
2006-10-25 10:45:44 · answer #1 · answered by AdamKadmon 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry to hear that about your son and his wife, its a terrible thing to go through a miscarriage, you need to let them know that you will be there to support them and even though its hard it happened for a reason, and there was nothing they could have done to prevent it. Also tell them to go to the doctor to find out if they can what happened, and why, if it was an incomplete cervix or just not the right time, If she has an incomplete cervix then she will need to have a stitch placed in to prevent another miscarriage, They can try straight away but need to deal with there grief first to prevent not dealing with it at all.
I fell pregnant and lost the baby, I was pregnant again in 2 months. But I found it hard to bond with my baby as I wa so scared I would loose him to.
2006-10-25 18:32:05 · answer #2 · answered by mj_missi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give them space to grieve (if it does happen) give them time together and then when they are ready be a listening ear for them dont overcrowd them just hugs and maybe do chores for them if you are close by such as grocery shopping or any other mundane thing they may not feel like doing right now. Be around for them but dont over do it. Leave the "You can try again" bit til they are over the shock, and really a doctor will be the best advisor in this situation. good luck and hopefully this time next year you will have a health grandchild.
2006-10-25 17:54:04 · answer #3 · answered by . 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cant do anything unless they confirm this themselves and then you can only be there for them. if it hasn't happened yet the daughter in law should be resting and may need you to help out looking after the house etc. they wont try again untill they have come to terms with the loss of this one and depending on how far on the pregnancy was it is often a good idea to give the little one a name and go through the grieving process but i depends on what they want. one thing is for definate that is that your son will feel that he has to be strong for his wife and will hide his feelings from her often leading to the impression that it hasn't affected him as much and that he is coping with this. do not be fooled by this and be there for him to talk to and be a shoulder to cry on. he can't do this at home.this was his baby too.
2006-10-25 17:53:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had 2 miscarriages so all i can say to you as their family is be totally supportive and its really Important just to listen. i miscarried at 12 weeks and then at 5 but fell pregnant with my son straight away and he is almost 3. I would advice them to try when THEY are ready, my GP did not tell me to wait as i believe this would have caused more stress. it is a very sad time for all of you and you have my sympathy. Keep close to them and they will talk to you when they're ready and im sure at that time you will know in your heart the right things to say. wishing you all the health and happiness for future grandchildren xx
2006-10-25 17:45:45 · answer #5 · answered by louise 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be there for them. I have gone through this twice. My parents came over the first time and made dinner, just hung out. The second time I wanted to be alone but just to know that you have someone to talk to is awesome. As far as trying again, when they are ready. The first time I was afraid to try again and I hurt pretty bad at times, but the second time I was ready to go the next month. You have to be mentally ready though. Just don't put any pressure on them.
2006-10-25 17:49:02 · answer #6 · answered by kimntrent 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i had 3 miscarriages myself. I felt very isolated and just wanted to be with my husband alone for a while. Give them time to get through this. Let them know you are thinking of them. My parents sent me a lovely card which meant a lot!! They will get over this but it will take time and she shouldnt give up hope. Good luck.
2006-10-28 07:33:18 · answer #7 · answered by sarah w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it hasn't happened yet so just stay calm, my daughter-in-law bleed three times during he pregnancy ,and i mean bled ,and we were told one of her twins had died the day be for they were born then she gave birth to the boy twin and had a Cesarean for the girl they are two next month ,and by the way they were ivf twins so they were pests from the start, so just wait and see god willing it wont be nothing,on the other hand a lot of women loose their first baby's, give it a few months and they can begin again, but you will all need to grieve, hope your news will be good keep us posted good luck, just be there for them and keep your grief for when you are alone.
2006-10-26 05:14:55 · answer #8 · answered by twinsters 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be there for them for whatever they need. unfor tunately though, you are her mum in law...she will depend more on her own mum at this point. speak to her mum and say that you want to help and if there is any way you can...to let you know. your daughter in law will just be sad and will not know what to do to make herself feel better. she needs her mum.
as far as trying for a second time, she'll have to have a few regular periods first before trying again. her body will want to heal itself. maybe in 2 to 3 months.
2006-10-25 17:50:41 · answer #9 · answered by canada grl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You THINK !!!!
Well first I would suggest the lass gets medical advice. If she has miscarried ( depending on the term) she may well need Hospital treatment. The hospital / GP will have a list of local support groups.
2006-10-25 17:57:11 · answer #10 · answered by Brian 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
http://www.pregnancyloss.info/prevention.htm
Whatever you do DO NOT say you know how it feels if you have not experienced the loss of a child yourself. Just be them for them.Tell them you don't what to say except that you are sorry and if they need anything they can go to you. That's what I would do.
Oh and I forgot to add that she will need to go to the doctor to be sure she had a miscarriage BC she will most likely need to have a DNC done to prevent infection.
2006-10-25 17:54:33 · answer #11 · answered by mystique_dragon4 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋