can you share with me your feelings on losing a loved one around christmas?

Question

what do you feel like when Christmas comes along?

Answer 1

it is the most horrible feeling, every year you go back and remember how things used to be. The holidays are just a painful reminder of the way things were.

Answer 2

My best friends brother died on christmas eve, and being Italians that day was always more celebrated than actual christmas day. Now they don't even have family over and just usually order a pizza and sit together as an immediate family. No one talks about the brother though, it's been almost 10 years now and it's still a sore subject, he was only 26 and left behind a young wife and child.

Answer 3

Dec 03, my dad died, Aug 04 my only child, son died, Sept 05 my husband died. I was an only child. My mother has been dead ten years, My son left a month old daughter, her mom remarried and moved to another state. Christmas is not the same, will never be the same, I have wonderful memories that are bitter sweet. I know where they are, it is a better place. I know they loved me, that means alot. I have a fantastic man I met in my life, and he makes life worth while. The deaths leaves an empty void, that can shrink, but will never be filled, especially my son. Christmas though is about life and God's gift of salvation, through the temporal loss there is sadness, but the joy of knowing Jesus takes the tears away, peace on earth is with God.

Answer 4

My father died in February and I feel the loss everyday, but the closer Christmas gets the more fragile I feel .I still feel like I can't breathe sometimes the pain is so unreal .last Christmas was the first time in a long time that my dad stayed with my family on Christmas it was wonderful it was a gift from god that he came and we had that time together.he was only 54 and I was not ready to let him go. I talk to him often it helps.I am going to make a Christmas wreath for his grave and just try and remember the good times.

Answer 5

This coming up Christmas will be the first one that I will spend without my little brother who died in January of this year. He was only 21. Last Christmas was the last day that I saw him alive. I don't know how I'm gonna feel, I just know that Christmas will never be the same.

Answer 6

The first Christmas that we had after my dad died was really empty. We are a super traditional family and without every family member it just didn't feel the same
This will be the second Christmas since he died, and my number one goal is to not sulk around but to have a good time and remember him. He wouldn't want me to be sad every holiday he'd want me to celebrate Jesus and give gifts.

I've started new traditions like baking his favorite pie on his birthday, and going to the mountains on his death day. Anything that will help me remember him and celebrate the time I had with him is better than sitting around feeling sorry for myself that my dad died before he could walk me down he isle etc...

Believe me the first year is the hardest, but you have to remember that your loved one doesn't want you to be sad all the time. you aren't a bad person for not thinking of that person every second of the day and feeling sad. Live your life and be happy, they died not you. And on a different note, being sad isn't bad either, just make sure the sadness doesn't control your life.

Answer 7

My daughter is still tramatized after 20 years when my father in law died Christmas Day after playing Santa Claus. It was a sudden Heart Attack and all the children were there when it happened and the paramedic were trying to revive him. So I feel your pain.
It does take a very long time to get over.
Fairyglow

Answer 8

My father died on Dec 23rd in the early 80's & my mother in law died Dec 26th in the early 90's. We buried my father on Christmas eve & buried my mother in law on Dec 31st. It is always hard & after so many years I still find myself thinking about them daily. I think that is the reason now that we try to stretch Christmas into more then just one day. We always go out to dinner on the 23rd & have a big get together on the 24th. We do the big family thing on Christmas & always have a big party on the 31st. I think that it helps us from dwelling on it & celebrating what we do have with loved ones as long as we have them.

Answer 9

I lost my mom and dad this past year. I really wish this christmas was over already. I was just telling my brother that I wish I could be alone this year, and not have to act happy for anyone.But christmas wil be at my house again.

Answer 10

well,i lost my father a year ago,christmas was his fav time of year,even though me and my siblings are all older and have our own familys,he still made us all feel like little kids and it was GREAT.my 1st christmas without him was very hard and depressing.i tried to get into the christmas spirit,but me and my sister just couldnt do it,it just wasnt the same.but now with ALOT of prayer and all the good memories of my dad,i want this year to be just as if he was alive.i know that he would not want us to just give up like that.i want my kids to know the christmases that i had growing up and i want them to feel like my father made us feel.instead of being sad,i use the holidays to celebrate his life.its hard at first but it gets easier.PEACE

Answer 11

MY Dad passed away on DEC. 20th a decade ago. I'm the only son with 4 sisters and come from a large family with 28 cousins all female. It was hard on me but I can only imagine how much harder it was on my Mother. God Bless Her.