My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 5 years. I found out a little over a month ago that he cheated on me last year. Since I found out, he's told me that he regrets everything that he's done. He tells me that he's sorry everyday. And he's told me that this is the worst mistake he's ever made in his life.
I was just wondering if there's anyone out there that has been cheated on, and stayed with the person, that might be able to help me. I've never been cheated on before, and my boyfriend is someone I NEVER would have even THOUGHT would do anything like this to me!!
We've been talking about it pretty much everyday. I want to know EVERYTHING that happend(which I kinda don't cuz then I think about it more!?). He told me that he doesn't want to lose me and that he'll do anything to help us get through this. I really love him and this just ******* SUCKS!!! I would just like someone to talk to that has been cheated on and stayed together. Is there any hope at all!!?
2006-10-25 09:19:33 · 11 answers · asked by Kristin K 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have had a similar situation except I was the cheater.. Sometimes even when you truly love someone you get confused. Another person comes into your life and lust kicks in and you soon forget how wonderful your relationship with the one you love is. The lust is just that... you think the grass looks greener on the other side but then you realize your mistake, and that building a relationship with someone takes time, trust, etc.. I think you just have to work through it. If you belive your bf is truly sorry and really does love you and you love him back then just try to forgive him and move on. Work on the trust issue that will obviously be a problem and pray! Realize that everyone makes mistakes though and try to remember that!
2006-10-25 09:27:36 · answer #1 · answered by Candacexox 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If it was a year ago, and you were married 4 years... probably courted 2 or more.. It's probably not that abnormal. Men and women cheat for different reasons. It's hard for you to understand, but for you there would be emotional attachment, for a guy it's all about the sex, and of course cheating is kinda of a thrill to people. but after you commit you act of infielity, reality sits in, the guilt consumes you. You realize you have a loving spouse who doesn't deserve this. In some cases, not all. If you think this is a case like that, the question isn't should you forgive him, the question is can you?
Divorce is hard and it sucks, but that's no reason to stay in a relationship you think is gonna be devoid of happiness, it's not like there's something wrong with you if you can't forgive and move on. At the same time it would be really special if you could. Your gonna have to battle those emotions alot, and alot less as time goes on and heals what has been damaged.
2006-10-25 09:30:05 · answer #2 · answered by ~MB~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow i no how u feel well for me,i never got over it i always had a suspision in the back of my mind since,she did it to me and ill never forgive her theres no moving on w it love would never be the same between u 2,its completely ruined my self image and esteem,(IE)she cheated on me w my brother while i was @work so the choice is hard look @how ur relationship has been and see if u think it is strong enough to overcome this
2006-10-25 11:44:13 · answer #3 · answered by strykemded75 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wel I am sorry. But that hasnt happened to me yet but i hope it never does either i bet it hurts and I am sorry for what you r feeling but I suggest that if you really want to get somewhere if u r gonna fogive u need to forget and if u think u cant do that i think ur gonna go through some tough times in ur relationship...
2006-10-25 09:53:50 · answer #4 · answered by JAZY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating IS terrible. But, IF he's a boyfriend, and not a husband, he couldn't cheat, because only a married person can cheat. Only married people have made the commitment to be faithful. Single people can shack up, or play house- but it isn't marriage.
2006-10-25 09:29:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
My husband cheated on me about 5 years ago. We are still together and tho you'll never forget, I do believe its possible to forgive and move on. If that's what you want. I know it hurts and you'll probably have trust issues. But I think its possible to change and still be together.
2006-10-25 09:34:00 · answer #6 · answered by ilvtnt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry, this can't work with me. Just wouldn't enjoy the relationship knowing my wife cheated on me. If you are a forgiving person, it could work actually but for me, not sure I can. But thats just me!
2006-10-25 09:24:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. And here's why: once someone cheats that means they broke their commitment to you - that means they don't really love you or respect you. If you allow that person to remain in your life, you are enabling them to keep cheating - and believe me, they will cheat again.
2006-10-25 09:22:26 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
NO....DONT. From ur writing i know that u can never forgive him....so let him go......
2006-10-25 09:22:48 · answer #9 · answered by rahim_al_kajai 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's only your boyfriend - not your husband!!
Move on .....NEXT!!
2006-10-25 10:04:36 · answer #10 · answered by brenny_boo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋