im trying to get in touch with my sons dad, who he has never met, for many reasons. Am i doing the right thing or should i let sleeping dogs lay?
2006-10-25 09:07:59 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
What ever is the best for your son...does he want to meet him....do you know where to find his dad?
2006-10-25 09:10:25 · answer #1 · answered by graciegirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, contact him. Your son has a right to know his father. I have a on the East Coast that I have never met and I regret it everyday of my life. I let his mother "scare" me into not having a relationship with my son. Every Christmas or his B-day (01Sept) I think of him and he doesn't even know it. He is 31 yr old now. I stopped and called him while passing through his home town and he said he didn't want to meet me. That was his decision.
I really do understand. I am a total stranger to him.
Let him know his father.
2006-10-25 16:14:44 · answer #2 · answered by Prince Thom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel that you are doing the right thing.You son should not blame you or he should at no time think that you kept him away from his father.This is a tough decision that you have to make. You got to do it now rather than repenting it later on. No matter what, we tend to be guilt even though we are not in fault. Do not let the guilt eat into you.
My very best wishes in finding him and everything works out well.
2006-10-25 17:00:05 · answer #3 · answered by stewart j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it is the right thing to do,at least if he doesn't want to know you can tell your son you tried, if you don't try your son could end up blaming you for his dad not being around.but remember he is your son an if you don't trust the dad around you son on his own there are other ways for them to stay in touch an see each other.good luck
2006-10-25 16:18:42 · answer #4 · answered by sarah t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,it depends on if your son is old enough to want to see him.Is it for you or your son? Just because he is his real father doesnt mean he will be a positive thing in his life.If it going to cause you and him alot of heart ache then why?i am sure you are bringing him up just fine without him and doing a great job.Men are not always a good thing in a childs life,especially if he has not been there for you or him.good luck though.
2006-10-25 16:41:58 · answer #5 · answered by Lucy A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are as he will want to meet him one day,and you are not doing him any favours by keeping anything from him,so why not talk to him about how he feels if he is old enough,also maybe the father will come in search of him one day,so i would get in there first so you can lay down ground rules etc but good luck in whatever you decide
2006-10-25 16:18:57 · answer #6 · answered by amber_xx66 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this man was abusive in ANY way, then don't bother. But what I think you are saying is that he was an okay guy. If this is the case, then he deserves to know that he HAS a son, and his son deserves to KNOW his father. It is not your choice to play God. Not trying to insult you, I just know from experience. I kept my daughter from visiting her father when we split. At the time I thought it was the wise choice. But, he passed away at the age of 30, and now I regret keeping her from visiting. She should have known him better....and basically, I robbed her of that. Please don't make the same mistake. You will regret it and it will haunt you for the rest of your days...
2006-10-25 16:18:30 · answer #7 · answered by moonbaby3504 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i would think it matters how old is you child and is he asking to see his father if not wait until your son is ready. Does the dad want to see the child because beleive me if he doesnt want to see his son it would be more damaging to the child to have his father popping in and out of his life then to not know him at all. But When your child gets to an age to understand i would explain it to him.
2006-10-25 16:14:22 · answer #8 · answered by lovable110 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should try to find your sons dad.It is good for your son to feeling the normal hummen .Let the future do as he can do ,only you will do your duty about your son and his dad.
2006-10-25 16:24:51 · answer #9 · answered by abotraka777 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he paying for his son? If not then yes. Do you want him to have a relationship with his son? Did he abandon you and your son? Tough one, only you know the answer to this.
2006-10-25 16:11:04 · answer #10 · answered by the woo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋