Im only 16 and just found out that i am pregnant with my ex bf's baby! he's 16 also and i had told him the news and he freaked out! he wants me to have an abortion but its against my religion to do so! i dont kno what to do! my parents are upset cause the baby will be mixed (black & white)! I need some big time help please!!!!
2006-10-25 08:25:13 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I hate it when people on here tell you to put your child up for adoption or to abort the fetus just because you're young... sweet heart; You got yourself into this and Now you need to be an adult and take care of that baby growing inside of you... It's gonna be hard but YOU have to do it... You need to finish High School...And You need to be a Great Mother... Especially if the Father will not be around to help *and if he is around*.... I got pregnant while in high school... I had a beautiful baby girl... Everyone told me to put it up for adoption or to abort it... I knew I had made a mistake by getting pregnant and that I needed to take Full responsibility for my actions... I started working part time at my local wal-mart *I worked after school*... I had talked to my school counselor and he helped me apply to an alternative High School where I could attend and graduate in 2 years instead of 3... I had to work my but off But I did graduate... For day care I applied at Family Services *also known as DFS* which gave me free child care while attending school... You are going to have a Long , Hard life ahead of you... I missed out on alot of things but I wouldn't change my life for anyone or anything... I had to Grow up fast, I didn't get to hang out with my friends or go to the movies; I didn't get to have those rebellious years.. It will affect everything you are use to doing... I'm now married with 2 children and 1 on the way... I love my life... Good Luck on whatever you decide is best for your baby and you .... There is nothing wrong with having a mixed baby.... Any financial and medical help you need you should go to a Family Services office and apply for assisstance... You should also see if you can apply for W.I.C. ... W.I.C. is a program that is available in most states it not only helps provide you with food but they will give you great advice on how to care for you and your baby....If you have any other questions feel free to email me...
As for your parents, My b/f's mother *now my mother in law* hated me and she always shoved abortion and adoption in my face... Now she apologizes for being so rude... Your parents have every right to be upset with you but their anger and upset emotions will more than likely change once the baby arrives...Just give them time...
2006-10-25 08:44:29 · answer #1 · answered by secret agent lady 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a hard solution but if your man won't (and probably can't anyway) support you, the best option for you may be adoption. This way you do not go against your religion and get an abortion but your parents don't get stuck raising a child they are embarrassed about. If your parents have a serious problem with the baby being mixed (sad in this day and age that this still an issue) they won't raise your child like they would have raised you. I say they won't raise, because at 16 you are still dependent on them for everything, it might be your baby, but it will end up being your parent's financial responsiblity. Even if your guy chooses to stick around, he won't be much help at 16. Adoption might be the best way to go without harming an innocent child, and to make sure he or she becomes a part of a family that does not care about mixed races. Talk to your parents about it, see what they are willing to do, it is probably not worth trying to pressure your ex into anything, at his age all he will do is run. good luck
2006-10-25 08:32:37 · answer #2 · answered by manderstwin1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to decide if you r ready to have a baby. If you decide to keep the baby and not give it up for adoption, i applaud you. My best friend got pregnant at 16 and today, (we are 26), she is still a wonderful mother. But she was mature and could handle it. She also had a great support system who helped her a lot. If you don't have that, then consider adoption or something. Don't be one of those young girls who lets their parents raise their kids, raise your own. On the black/white dilema, get over it. It's almost 2007 and no one really cares about that anymore. If you do decide to keep the baby, definetely get child support from the father no matter what! He may try to say he wants you back just so he don't have to pay, but take him to court, it's usually a lie. Protect your child!
2006-10-25 08:43:46 · answer #3 · answered by colleen b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First and foremost...regardless of what the father thinks or says...you must follow through with collection of child support. Your baby deserves it. And second, your life is about to change very dramatically. You really do need to consider all of your options. There are many couples out there who cannot have children and while adoption may be a difficult thing...you need to consider the life that you have created and the life that you will be able to provide for this child. If you would like to, please, contact me directly and I will give you some advice and some good places to start to get help if you decide to have the baby. I was a mother at age 17, and it is much harder than it sounds!
It was also much harder than I EVER thought it would be...But I survived and my daughter is now 12. I hope to hear from you...and if not..good luck.
2006-10-25 08:38:53 · answer #4 · answered by Sunshine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not let your son see this guy. You should not be dating him. If he is suicidal, aggressive, and abusive, then that is not healthy for you baby. You should be communicating with your parents & talking with a counselor. It sounds like you have some issues that you need to talk out with someone. I think that would be helpful, especially if you are going to bring a baby in this world. Remember that once you bring this baby into the world, that it's no longer just about you. It is about both of you. That baby deserves a healthy life and no matter how much you may like this guy, he doesn't deserve the time of day with your child.
2016-05-22 13:23:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your parents first off to get over the black white part its 2006 i have a beautiful mixed race baby and another on the way ! yes i was the first to have a mixed race baby in the family but nobody has batted an eyelid to that fact! and if you dont want an abortion dont there are other options you can put the baby up for adoption or you you will have to grow up very quickly and bring the baby up yourself even though people will say you are not capable but anyone can be capable if they try!if the your ex doesnt want to be there dont worry you CAN do it on your own so dont worry! you do what ever feels right its your body and your baby! the best of luck to you chick xx
2006-10-25 08:31:44 · answer #6 · answered by mummy of 2 boys and a princess x 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
there are many help centers that you can call to ask advise. being that young and pregnant isn't going to be easy. you said abortion is against your religion...(mine too) call your Pastor/Priest and just talk to them....after your parents calm down, talk to them too. No one can say if your ex will be there or not, he's young too and may not at this time know where his heart is. Many people are going to tell you to do many things with the baby...I can tell you that adoption is an option, I'm adopted and I think I turned out pretty good and I know my biological parents. You just have to think of whats best for the baby, not what's best for anyone else or how it'll make them feel. don't let guilt of any kind sway you to make a rash decision....think only of the baby and the kind of life you want for him/her.
2006-10-25 08:39:26 · answer #7 · answered by sred 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do not have an Abortion, that is murder, and you will regret it for the rest of your life.
Get to a good Adoption Attorney and select parents for your baby. Go as soon as you are able.
You can get through another 8 months and give your baby a chance at a good life. Then you can get on with yours as can your ex-boyfriend. You and he are not old enough to begin a family on your own.
Be strong one day at a time. Usually the adoptive parents will pay your medical bills, attorneys fees and I think you get to make the choice and meet them.
My Son is adopted, his Mother was young also and not married to his Dad. We were blessed she chose us.
He has always been a true joy to us. He is now grown with a daughter of his own.
2006-10-25 08:38:58 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL - he already told you he doesnt want the baby.
And why are your parents upset that the baby will be mixed? It says right in the bible that the way of things is to have mixed breed babies to make the next evolution of mankind come into being.
So far you did the right thing by having sex and having a kid. Its your parents, your ex-bf and society that's screwed up.
Well, you have two choices - get an abortion, or have the kid. That about sums it up. The guy will NOT be there as the father - forget about it - you had a loser for a bf. Look for someone else in the future.
2006-10-25 08:36:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
First dont end that childs life just because a non good father wonts to be a dick, if anything you can put it up for adoption. I got pg at 16 also, and my parents did the same, but as soon as there granddaughter was born you couldnt pri them away from her, they are just upset right now, it will pass in time. That is there grandchild and one time of seeing it will fix everything, dont give up on your baby, and stay strong. God does things for a reason and he wont give you something you cant handle.
2006-10-25 08:33:26 · answer #10 · answered by Brandi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋