Need your help ladies? My wife put on an act before our marriage. Help!?

Question

My wife and I were talking about our sex life the other day and I had asked her about certain things that she used to do and would do with me that she no longer does. Exp: giving me a BJ and also some mild bondage and letting me play with toys with her. I had asked her why this has all stopped and she starting to laugh and said that she was only doing these things to reel me in so I would want to marry her. She made me think that whaty she did was everything that I always wanted ina woman, and it was true. I think that is so wrong because she deceived me and I'm not happy about it and I'm not sure what I should do?

Answer 1

She is selfish! Love is giving...
She is probably the type that would get a divorce before trying everything and working stuff out. Therefore you don't have much room to work with. You could try doing the same thing to her....there are obvious qualities that she likes in you that she expects to stay the same, try with holding that from her. Better yet! withhold sex from her. It will be hard, very hard! She thinks she has all the power because she knows you want these things from her. You see women operate on attention. kinda like dogs and food. IF you give her all the attention she wants and then expect her to do things you want, you are going to drive yourself nuts and end up kicking the dog. But if you can show her that good behavior is rewarded and bad behavior gets her nowhere. She will understand. You guys are still a young couple so it is not too late.
You have had the conversation so she knows what you want. So now you need to just lose interest in her a little. When you typically go after her for sex....try staying up a little later and watching TV by yourself. Remember attention is what she needs. She married you thinking you will always be there for her and always want her, just like you think sex and everything should still be fun like before. Show her that you are still a man and have control over the situation.

There is a good little article on this in askmen.com about training your girlfriend.

You can do this my brother! Marriage does not have to be boring. But most importantly....if you get her to be the sexy minx she was before...don't take it for granted. You still have to give to. Don't take it for granted that keeping attention from her will get her to do anything. Show that her good deeds are appreciated. that is the big mistake married guys make. They hold too much back once they get what they want and the woman feels totally used and then you got a big big problem.

If she was that blunt about it she is probably just messing with you, but if not....you know what to do.


And to all you ladies that read this.... Lady in the Streets, Freak in the sheets.....live by those rules and you will keep your man happy. And a happy man is a loving man!

Answer 2

I have watched ladies pull an 'act' on a guy in order to get him. Not nice.
You do, of course, have the option of telling her put up or take the door.
Seriously sit her down and tell her that these things are very important to you. I would never condone forcing someone to do anything they aren't comfortable doing so if she doesn't want to you have to decide if the marriage can work without it.
It does seem to me that she really isn't a very nice person, she deceived you in order to trap you, purposely. Coniving b**tch comes to mind. I think that is the part that concerns me the most. Pretending to be somone you're not until the hook is firmly set. What else has she lied about? and perhaps more important, when is the next time she'll play you?

Answer 3

This is not uncommon that in marriage one spouse is more interested in sex than the other.
You need to discuss with your wife your needs.
When it comes to talking with our partners about sex, panic can often set in. Here are ideas on raising those hard to raise issues.
1. Clarify the Issue for Yourself, What would satisfy you and with what frequency.Remind her that the quality is more important of quantity. We all remember great moments and very few so so moments.
Game Mechanics are like positions in sex: if you only use one then boredom eventually will ensue.
2. Try to write it down. Writing down what you want to talk about is a great step to clarify your issues for yourself and practice the way you might communicate it to your wife. Some people actually write a letter, and end up giving it to them at a later point. Letter writing can be a powerful way to communicate your thoughts and feelings, and if done along with talking it can increase intimacy in a relationship in surprising ways.
3. Practice the talk If you’re nervous about bringing it up, practice.
4. Consider your timing one of the most important considerations is when to talk. This will depend a lot on what you are talking about. Raising your dissatisfaction with the sex fetishes of your sex life minutes before your kids are due home s not a good idea.
If talk will not help consider counseling. Be patient and tell her that you love her and that you want to love her more .
Masturbating will help to relieve sexual pressure 92% married man masturbate.

Answer 4

She definitely should've been honest with you. For some people (men and women) it's all about "tricking" someone into marriage. But really, is this such a big deal? There must be something you can do to get around the problem. Buy a sexy book and try out the moves....see a sex counselor....whatever. Don't write her off yet....she might be more willing when you're through!

Answer 5

Well I certainly hope she was kidding. I did those things with my husband before we met because I loved him. Honestly, now I don't do that so much anymore, but I believe it's because of the daily routines. One partner or the other has to put some spark back in the marriage. Try planning a special night just for the two of you but really focus on her, maybe she'll suprise you in the end.

Answer 6

Let me just say this- as a woman, there are few of us who would "act" (as in your example) like that to get a man to marry them. Those are extremely personal things that if you're uncomfortable doing- you avoid them. In short- I would not believe the "acting" part.
You need to have a frank and honest talk about this with her. Tell her how you feel about it. Maybe she for some reason doesn't like it anymore. Find out what is going on for real.

Answer 7

Great....that is all we need. Like we don't have enough problems in the US without an open border to every nutjob that wants to come on in. Get your life together and stop calling CONGRESSMEN to help you with a ridiculous domestic issue. our congress has better things to do than solve a spat between two immature people, let alone ones who were allowed to come in this country by our own grace.

Answer 8

I can understand that you are upset because you now see a side to your wife you never knew existed. If you have no children and think you made a mistake then now would be the time to get out. If there are children involved suck it up and be a loving father and husband, teach your children to be honest and caring and you will have accomplished something greater in this world.

Answer 9

women are like that they dont like to admit it most women are so scared to be alone that they well do anything to just get you where you are know. i think you should re-evaluate ur relationship. im not saying a divorce here i just mean is this ******** and sex toys all that the relationship is based on or is there more. Do you want to find other ways to satisfy each other? im sure that answer is yes maybe you should start doing the things she used to do yourself it may help and she may like it that you are iniciating it instead of her good luck

Answer 10

How long have you been with her before you married her? I would let her no how you feel and ask her why she won't do it anymore. She may not be interested in sex or even bored with you. I would ask her to try doing it again, maybe she will enjoy it as she did when before you were married.