My current bf is great. I don't compare him to anyone else...however, I'm scarred. I need to erase the feeling that I'll never be good enough. I need to stop having the anticipation that eventually he'll do me wrong, just because that's how it's supposed to be. I look for things...even little things, and analyze it. I don't want to mess it up. He wants to marry me someday and have a family, but until that actually happens, I'm just a mess. I've already made an appt. to see a doctor, hopefully that helps. Anyone have any suggestions on how to stop being such a paranoid idiot??
2006-10-24 20:02:43 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I've even had thoughts about just letting him go because I don't wanna hurt him. Save us both the trouble, you know? I wanna trust him, I really do, just very very scared. I couldn't handle being hurt again.
2006-10-24 20:10:24 · update #1
You arent alone hun. My fiance is the best thing to ever happen to me. God knows I love him to death and without him.. I cant even imagine life. Everyday when I wake up next to him I think how gorgeous he is and how much I love him. He gets up and has to go to work. The minute I am alone I start to wonder why is he with me? He's so great and I'm so plain. He has an awesome job, yet I hate him leaving me for it. He'll call me sometime during the day, and when we get off the phone I think about everything he said and sometimes take it the wrong way and fight with him when he gets home about it.
He's asked me to marry him, and while I said yes, I cant even set a date with him for I think too much that we shouldnt do it.
I start to think that he deserves someone better, and then I will get into fights with him the minute he comes home about something really stupid. Trying to force him away. Then I cry and say im sorry, just to wake up the next day and think about something new that isnt going work out between me and him.
I wish you the best of luck hun.. Its hard. Just have to take a chance.. trust in someone and believe it.. and if he does eventually turn out to do you wrong sometime down the line, you'll just have to pick yourself back up again. You dont want to live your life all alone and not being able to be wtih anyone. If your boyfriend deserves you, he will be patient enough to do whatever it takes to make you feel comfortable.
2006-10-24 20:15:56 · answer #1 · answered by Barbara Faye 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its a very normal feeling to feel scared nd negative whenever things change in life, the more the experience the best it is. so, what can be done in this situation is be patient and have faith in urself. just trust urself and relax. take things slowly. it might be difficul at this point but try to talk abt it with ur bf and be positive. if he loves u he'll understand and maybe his reason of choosing u as his luv might help u feel better. so communication is the answer.
2006-10-24 20:20:11 · answer #2 · answered by sakshi 7 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to relax, enjoy each other for now. It's a good idea to see someone. However, try to relax and stop analyzing 'cos if he feels pressure by the way you behave, he may leave you so becareful. Also if you know why you feel the way you feel, let him know. Talking things out with him will help a great deal.
2006-10-24 20:06:20 · answer #3 · answered by teddytrin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell this to your doctor. Let him/her know that you feel incredibly insecure. It's OK to be scared... What in your life has told you that it's "supposed to be" that he's going to do you wrong? Find that, and tell your doctor that, too. Be straight with the doc, let him/her know exactly what's going on in your thoughts. Follow his/her recommendations. Good luck... sounds like your guy is great, and like you're being very normal in your fears given the kinds of things our current society is promoting. Follow your heart, and follow your doc's advice.
2006-10-24 20:10:20 · answer #4 · answered by pair-a-docs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how you feel. I'm not even dating yet, but I get extremely scared of everything that might come my way when I like someone. So I decided not to let myself like anybody, so I don't get all messed up like that. It usually works, but not always. Sometimes I end up crushing on somebody in the worst possible way. Last time it happened it literally made me sick to my stomach.
2006-10-24 20:12:49 · answer #5 · answered by Desert Rat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
glad to know i'm not the only one :) i have a great bf too, and i treated him like s*** for over a year. it's now 2+ yrs that i've been with him and i've learned to loosen up and enjoy his company--still think too much, though...
i would suggest you keep on telling him how you feel--he sounds like a good guy too. then ask him for reassurance once in awhile. but make it a point to build up your self-confidence. when you're confident in yourself you won't always be so fearful of everything--it's a growing up process, a stage. you can do it :D
2006-10-24 20:36:57 · answer #6 · answered by wat_more_can_i_say? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thinking too much about the future can make "today" fade away!
Just live with feelings that's all!
2006-10-24 20:55:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
chill out. Life is meant to be lived, not feared.
Remember that a life lived in fear is a life half lived.
2006-10-24 20:05:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Zoloft..
To be serious for a minute, maybe a doctor is your best bet.
2006-10-24 20:05:12 · answer #9 · answered by . 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
face ur inner demons first..ur trippin just go with the flow..
2006-10-24 20:17:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋