What is the best blond joke you have ever heard??

Question

I am trying to find one I haven't heard....thank you all in advance!!!

Answer 1

Blind Man In A Lesbian Bar

A blind man enters a lesbian bar by mistake. He find his way to a barstool and orders a drink.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender in a loud voice,

"Hey bartender, you wanna hear the best dumb blonde joke ever?"

The bar immediately falls deathly quiet. In a deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things . . .

"One: The bartender is a blonde woman.

"Two: The bouncer is a blonde woman.

"Three: The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional boxer.

"Four: The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.

"Five: I'm a 6-foot, 200 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate and a very bad attitude!

"Now, think about it seriously, mister. Do you still want to tell that joke?"

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and says: "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times!"

Answer 2

sooner or later their replaced into 3 ladies. a brunete a crimson head and a blond. they have been in this opposition the place a comedian tells one hundred jokes and the guy that doesnt snort at any jokes wins. so the brunete laughs at humorous tale 5. the crimson head laughs at humorous tale 37 and the blond laughes at humorous tale ninety 9. after the competition the brunete and crimson head ask the blond why she laughed on the final humorous tale and the blond reported... i in basic terms have been given the 1st one lmao i laughed truly frustrating once I heard that. yet another one is.. a brunette crimson head and blond r robbing a shop. the police come so as that they each cover in a sack. the police kicks the 1st bag that the crimson heads in and he or she says meow so the cop says oh its in basic terms a cat. so he kicks the 2d sack that the brunetes in and he or she says ruff so the cop say oh its in basic terms a canines. so he kicks the sack the blonds in yet he doesnt pay attention something so he kicks it back and the blond says OUCH cant u see im a sack of potatoes? lol thats humorous too wish i helped

Answer 3

y did the blonde have tire marks on her back?because when the sign said dont walk ,she crawled LOL

y couldn' t the blonde call 911? because she couldnt find the eleven

a blond walks into a shoe store looks around for alligator shoes after not seeing any, she ask the shoe lady if they had any alligator shoes. the shoe lady says to her "no, why dont go look for some alligator shoes?" then the blonde says "ok then fine " and goes away. after a while the shoe lady closes up and goes home. on her way home she passes a swamp and spots the same blonde wrestling some alligators. she goes up to her and before she says anything, the blonde yells "dammit ,none of these alligators are wearing shoes"

Answer 4

What's more funnier than a blonde itself? A blonde trying to tell a blonde joke.

Answer 5

How do you confuse a blond? You stick her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.

How do you drown a blond? You put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

Answer 6

A blonde and a brunette are driving down an old dirt road surrounded by fields..........suddenly the brunette gasps "LOOK!" The blonde turns to see another blonde in a rowboat in the middle of the field rowing her heart out. "What an idiot!" Yells the Brunette. "I KNOW!!!" says the blonde, "If I could swim I'd go out there and smack her silly!!!"

Answer 7

there were 2 blonds in an elevator and the 1st said iam so tired being in this thing. the 2nd said whats that spot on ur dress? the 1st blond said i dont know what do u think it is? the 2nd blond said hell we have been working all day in here i bet i know what that is. the 2nd blond lick her dress and said oh its the vice presdent *** i rember the taste from 2 days ago

Answer 8

I have two.

1) What do a blonde and a turtle have in common?
A: Once they are on their backs they are screwed

2) What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito will stop sucking when you slap it.

Answer 9

What does a blond and a screen door have in common?
-the harder you bang it the looser it gets.

What do you call a blond with pigtails?
-a bl0wj@b with handle bars

What is the difference between a blond and a trampoline?
-you have to take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline

Answer 10

Blonde invention: A book on "How to Read"
A waterproof towel...